Hi I am so happy that your still on this site. God bless you and your family, this is a huge loss for all of you. One thing I can tell you from my experience with this is, it never goes away but in time all the good memories fill your heart and makes it easier to bare. There is always going to be something that will stop you and make you think of your loved one, a song or phrase or the way someone else does something that your husband would have done. There is always going to be that, but you replace all the hurt and anger with happy thoughts and the love you shared.
Just today my friend called and said that my son's cross on the side of the road, was broke. So went and took a look and it had rotted so we are making a new one. We built a big cross where the accident took place, and I go there on special days and put flowers and balloons.
It use to make me angry in the beginning to go there but I had to change my thinking and on his birthday or day of death or holidays or whatever. I had to replace it with thoughts of joy and all the memories of him loving life, and just honoring him. So doing that I was able to heal and forgive and it really does help you get through it.
I know that it does not happen right away but give yourself time to heal, and just know that your not alone. If I can be of any help to you in any way I would be happy to do so.
My prayers are with you
1984 Tubligation 1992 Diagnosed with Thyroid tumor
1993 Gallbladder Removed 1997 Hysterectomy 1998 Carpol Tunnel
1999 Spinal Cord Surgery for a Anacroid Syst
2001 Lower Lumbar Fusion L4-5
2003 Sigmoid Colon Resection
2006 Right Knee Replacement 2005 Breast Reduction
2008 RE-did the Lower Lumbar Fusion/ lamanoctomy
2010 DX: colonic Inertia/ Pelvic Floor Disorder
2010 Total Colectomy ABD W/O proctectomy; w/Ileosto