It's totally normal to feel on edge after everything you've been through. A low dose antidepressant will help you feel more like yourself again, so it's nothing to be afraid of.
My dad died unexpectedly two weeks after my proctocolectomy. After 6 months of feeling really sad, my doctor suggested a low dose of prozac. I wasn't thrilled about
taking it either, but it really did help me feel like my normal self again.
Plus, after 7 years of being sick with Crohn's and then suddenly well after surgery, I think I had some PTSD, because every time I had a stressful day at work, I would panic and think that the Crohn's was going to return. The medicine helped with that, too. I took it for less than a year and when I felt like I was ready, I weaned myself off of it, and have been fine ever since.
If you choose not to take any medicine, exercising is a great way to boost your mood naturally.
Take care buddy,
Dx'd Crohn's in '99 at age 28. Proctocolectomy and permanent ileostomy in '06.
Disease-free and medicine-free since surgery and very thankful to be healthy again.