I feel so behind!
First, Kyle...woohoo! So glad you made it through and you are doing SO well. You are one tough guy, keep up the good work!
Nanci - glad you are starting to feel better!
Mary, I saw one of your other posts saying you were feeling a little down right now - and I totally empathize with you. I have been feeling the same exact way...I feel very much like a waste of space right now...and like I am ruining everyone else's good time. I try so hard to be "normal" around my family but sometimes I am trying so hard, and I get very quiet and serious and not vibrant and happy like I used to be. I feel so angry with myself because I feel like such a burden all of the time! It helps so much to come here and see that there are other people who know exactly what I mean.
As far as my situation goes, I talked to my mom about
it yesterday. She says I am an adult and she won't put her foot down, because it is my health and my decision. She just worries because she is my mom. She really feels strongly that I need to try for a little while to "turn myself around"...meaning get back into a regular person's routine of getting up early and going to work and going to bed at a normal time. She said if I do that for a little while and I still feel bad, then she will feel like we really DID try everything. She wanted me to do that for 6 months but I said that was way too long. I said if I was going to have surgery I would want to do it at the end of August or September. I think 3-4 months is reasonable enough.
I am currently trying to decide between 2 surgeons at Duke University. One is a woman and one is a man. The man seems like he has more experience and has done a lot of writing and research, but I have had such good experiences with a female motility doctor (I felt like she really understood my symptoms and concerns when I would try to explain them to her)that I wonder if I should try meeting with a female surgeon. I just don't know how to decide. I am also worried that when I go to get a second opinion, what if that surgeon says something totally different than the other surgeon? I am not even sure what to do at a second opinion appointment. My motility doctor said she would refer me and send all of my records there for me. Do I tell the second surgeon that surgery has already been offered/recommended to me and that I just wanted to make sure I had a place and a surgeon I was comfortable with?
I feel like I am back in the territory of worrying and freaking out because I don't know what a doctor is going to tell me...I just want a plan of action so I can feel more grounded. Right now I feel like I'm just hanging here waiting for answers again. I mainly worry because of my pelvic floor. Both the motility doc and the surgeon said that I went to/graduated biofeedback and that is pretty much all they do for that, and it shouldn't be an issue but learning to relax is something you have to always remember how to do, so if I had issues with it in the future I may want to go to a refresher biofeedback session now and then. So I worry a new surgeon would say no to surgery or something because of that.
Post Edited (Alibee) : 6/6/2011 12:15:29 PM (GMT-6)