Un-be-lieve-able! Please don't let her get to you. She has no idea what you've been through or how good you could feel after surgery.
Does she think that people are selfish when they have surgery to remove a cancerous tumor? Or what about
people who spend hours away from their families each week to exercise? What's so wrong with doing things in order to be healthy? The end result is that you're going to be a happy and healthy wife, mom, daughter, sister, aunt, friend, employee, all for other people, which is not being selfish at all!
Dx'd Crohn's in '99 at age 28. Proctocolectomy and permanent ileostomy in '06.
Disease-free and medicine-free since surgery and very thankful to be healthy again.