Hodaya alerted me to your reply. Am still on a ship and only check email every few days. I THINK what is going on is that something either went wrong in surgery OR you have some scar tissue in one of your pelvic structures. THe reason I think this is because prior to your having your colon removed all your pelvic studies came back just fine. Scar tissue of a pelvic muscle no matter how well the surgery was done is a possibility. i THINK that is why your doc may be going MUM. Also the timing of your post-op difficulties (2 weeks post surgery) is the timing for scar tissue to set in.
So in your discussion with him, acknowledge that you realize scar tissue may be an outcome of the best done surgery and that you are in no way criticizing his work, you simply want to move forward and get the problem solved. (THis technique lets the doc off the hook in terms of less than desired outcome and puts you in the forward-moving problem-solving mode.) Tell him you would like him to be part of your forward-moving team of helpers and ask what HIS plans are for you. If he does not HAVE a plan, this is not a good thing. IN this case, cast around your area for a fresh look at the situation. I really don't get why he is not into finding a puborectalis muscle botox shot trial for you. It does exist, I had one and they put you under general for it. They inject both end plates of the puborectalis muscle as well as the levator ani muscle to which the puborectalis is attached. I know Lahey clinic does them if you are near Massachusetts. My issue turned out to be scar tissue and it did not work, but what the heck is the big deal about at least trying one? You could even ask that (but in more politically correct terms), you know what I mean.
Re: Med School. Take it from me. YOUR HEALTH comes first, YOUR CAREER comes second. WITHOUT YOU, YOU cannot have a career. I have traveled this road and it know. Don't get discouraged. Get you fixed up the best that can be done, reapply to school. If med school accepted you once, they will accept you again. You could even strengthen your application by citing the road you traveled as a patient since your first application and that your experience will make you a better doctor as you will have first hand experience as a patient, not a quality all docs possess.
Also, tell your doc that you realize with an ileo that it takes 6-9 months before the fast output slows down and that if this is in your future you need to take steps to rule out other possibilities (ie: trying the shot), then gettting the ileo. The holding pattern you are in is not moving forward. Glad your parents are going with you.
These are just ideas based on my experience; take what you think are good ideas and leave the rest. Keep in touch. We care. I was talking to a young man on the cruise who is about your age. I am old enough to be your mom, in fact your mom is likely younger than I. You deserve all the best treatment both medically, politically, psychologically, and spiritually while going through this time. Good luck, Rosemary