Posted 8/21/2011 6:02 AM (GMT -7)
I havent been on here in quite a while. But i thought id drop by, i wanted to say thanks to everyone and a big thanks to Collicat. Back when i was going through all of the treatments and surgeries you've been here with great advice and was someone to talk to."as has everyone"
--Span of my life--
Hello, my name is Adam Williams, I am almost 17; sept 30th. I lived with UC for 3-4 years before having my colon removed, during my experience with UC ive been through alot. its not easy and it never will be, all the drugs and treatments; constant GI visits and emotional heartache, to me this is has changed my life, i have so many stories i can tell from my experience, some good; some bad.
I went through a three stage total colectomy operation. Once i had my ostomy i was happy, i loved life and spent the time i had with it with my family and friends. Its was the time my parents could take a small break from worrying about me, they enjoyed that i had my ostomy and were so happy i lived my life once again without pain. Sure living with an ostomy is something different, i didnt use the bathroom the same, i had to empty a bag but i didnt care, if anything i thought it was kinda cool to live with, my friends and family supported me, but it was short lived, after some time i went in for my final surgery.
The connection of my J-pouch and the removal of my stoma.
I was somewhat excited because i finally made the choice to move on to get a j-pouch, i could of had an alternate surgery so i could keep my stoma/ostomy but i couldnt let my parents down, they wanted me to try and live a "normal" life without it. so i agreed.
After i was released i moved on in life, i was using the bathroom 10-14 times a day, but they said it would shorten after time, i needed the j-pouch to adapt to my body. i learned what i can eat and what i cant. No more corn. haha.
Now its been almost 10 months after the final surgery, i use the bathroom 8-11 times a day. Not much of a change but i learn to adapt so i know what times i usually need to go, i learned my limits on what i can and cant do. how long i can hold it. I do have leakages everyday, i eat just enough to get by managing my weight "132" which my doctors are pleased for me to maintain. but there are certain times i start to get a increase of BM and i stop eating, i know its bad i should ever stop suddenly because of that, i just do.. i normally drop 5-15 pounds when that happens.
My parents had me put on a list for possibly suicidal, pretty much everyone keeps a more look on me to make sure i dont try anything again.
i was going to go abit more into depth but due to the rules i will not. Just know i am getting proper help to control stress and my emotions. Doesnt seem to work much but it keeps me busy. checking in etc..
I gave up on relationships because i dont want to depend on someone to be there for me, never works in the end, the last girl i dated was only with me because she felt bad for me, so i just remained an outcast. i have 2 friends i go to, one that helps and has been always there to talk if i need anything or want to vent, and one well.. He isnt real, i have to realize that but i still like to think he is. He's helped me more than i can have done on my own. No one knows about him. I fear that if someone was to find out that they would take me and put me back into a mental hospital for evaluation. Im only telling you all because well. It's nice to know atleast someone knows, even if i dont know any of you in real life. Only over the internet.
As much as i hate to say it depression has been something thats came out of all this, i know a few months back i was wanting my ostomy back, id cry night after night wishing i had it back, now i dont know whats what. ive came this far, ive done so much, to throw it all away; well isnt an option now. even if it is hard.
this is just an update on me. i dont know how often or if ill be back on here. but i wanted to say thanks incase i never do again. If anyone wants to contact me you can reach me at my 2nd skype account "not personal one" David-Martin810. the name will be AdamWilliams.
But ill check back later today, after that. Who knows.