my first year is coming up with my colostomy and latley I have been thinking about it and I can't get it off my mind.
Novemember 3rd, 2004 The day started out like normal but then I started to get real bad spasms so my mom put me in bed and that didn't help so then she called 911 they took me to the hosptial and they did x-rays and they noticed my colon was going to burst so then they called a surgen and he told me that I had a 50/50 chance of coming out of the surgery. I remember telling him that if he lost me I'd haunt him for the rest of my life.
I just can't get that out of my head, I try to forget about it but I can't, its hard for me to sleep because I keep thinking of it and its driving me nuts! I wish I could forget about it because then it would make things easier for me. I know now that I'm alive and I'm not going to die, but thats the one thing that I keep thinking about.
I'm writing a letter to the doctor who saved my life that day and going to give it to him in person on November 3rd 2005 and going to thank him for saving my life, even though the colostomy drives me nuts sometimes. Before the colostomy I would think life wasn't worth it, but after I almost died I don't think that way anymore, so the colostomy has changed me.
I do need some support though because I'm going nuts thinking about that day, when I see Halloween candy I think that last Halloween could have been my last one.
If anyone could give me support that would be good,