I'm so glad that I can be of some encouragement to you. I want you to know that I understand what a difficult time you're going through when it comes to not wanting the bag. I was just like you and very much against having one, too. In fact, I did everything possible to avoid it for 7 years.
Unfortunately, my disease kept getting worse, until it finally became an emergency, and I had no choice anymore. After much convincing from four (yes, four!) GI doctors, I finally consented to a temporary ileostomy, all the while thinking that I would have it reversed in 6 months.
What happened during those months changed me. My health improved, and the effects of the disease (chronic diarrhea) did not control me anymore. It was wonderful. Dealing with the bag was easy, and I was completely shocked by how much it didn't bother me. I felt better than I had in years, and it didn't hold me back from anything. I could exercise, swim, and work full time, and still have the energy to cook a nice dinner and clean up the kitchen afterwards.
After 8 months, my colon flared up and bled nonstop for several days. I cried so hard, realizing that this was it. I had to make a choice. I was either going to keep this diseased colon and rectum and possibly end up with cancer, or I was going to get rid of it once and for all, and be healthy.
One of my good friends had died from cancer the year before at age 44, and I didn't want to go through what she went through. So, I called my surgeon and told her that I wanted to schedule surgery as soon as possible. That was last October, and I haven't regretted it for one second.
The bottom line is, none of us asked for or wanted bowel problems. Very few of us were born with them, so we remember what it was like to not have them. Deep down, we all just want it to go away. For some people, medicine and diet works for them. For others, like me, that was not enough, so I had to have surgery to fix my problem. Once I accepted that the bag was how it was going to be, I was fine and excited to know that my years of being sick were behind me.
Whatever ends up happening, you are on your way to good health. My stoma is located to the right of my belly button and down an inch or two. I can wear all the latest styles of clothing, like low rise jeans with a tank top, and it doesn't show at all. I can even wear a tankini bathing suit with a skirt. Yes, you can wear a stoma cap for showers, love making, and anytime you want a break from the bag.
I hope everything goes well tomorrow. I'm praying for you.
Cecilia - Prov. 3:5,6
Post Edited (flchurchlady) : 8/13/2007 10:49:13 PM (GMT-6)