I' m in a real quandry

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Regular Member

Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 160
   Posted 10/19/2007 10:31 AM (GMT -6)   
Well I saw another physician yesterday and the whole thing crashed in  on me.  He told me that because of the size of my stoma, strangulation of the colon with attendant peritonitis is inevitable.  He could not of course give me any time line, but he did say that emergency surgery like this was something I probably can not survive.  His suggestion is to have planned surgery, but even that is extremely risky.  I have a bad heart, and bad lungs and probably can not survive even planned surgery.  He told me to go and get my affairs in order and discuss the situation with the family.  I dont know what to do.  I am too young to die (82) and I have too much to do still before I go.  I just can't make a decision.  Pray for me
When there are no more choices, tha decision is easy!

Veteran Member

Date Joined Dec 2006
Total Posts : 1986
   Posted 10/19/2007 10:57 AM (GMT -6)   
Oh Ralph, I'm sorry to hear that and will definitely remember you in my prayers.

Maybe you should go and talk to a surgeon or was this a surgeon? Maybe they can do some type of surgery that will be less stressful on your heart? An epidural maybe?

Did your stoma start out this large? Do you have a disease process going on that caused it to be this large?

If you decide not to do the surgery, get out and do all the things you've always wanted to do, use up all your assets, do what YOU want. My father-in-law has an extremely aggressive form of melanoma that took him by surprise and his time is almost up. He saved his entire life and now wishes he would have done more. And it doesn't always take money, most times it just takes TIME.

My thoughts are with you, let us know what you decide.

49 years old, CD since I was a child.    
Six resection surgeries, permanent ostomy, adverse reactions to Remicade finally off of Prednisone, back on 6MP for maintenance, hoping for a long remission from this last surgery. 

Regular Member

Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 160
   Posted 10/19/2007 1:14 PM (GMT -6)   

thanks Judy

my first surery was with an epidural and I made it ok.  My cardiologist had said I wouldn/t make it , but I did.  The Doc I just saw was another surgeon.  I have been satisfied with my regular surgeon, but he figures that once he has cut he is finished.  The stoma sarted out at 7" by 2" and is now 7" x 4 1/2" and still growing.  I don't know how long I have, but if it has doubled in size in 6 months I don't expect it to go much longer.  I need to see an anasthesiologist and my cardiooligist again before I begin to fret too much.  I have been trying to wind things up.  I have a valuable book collection, but I don't think that anyone else is aware of how valuable some of the books are.  for example I just found a Nero Wolf mystery, a first edition that is now selling for a sum between $500 and $3000.  My edition looks to be about $650.  So I am inventorying my books, fine art, and other collections and trying to in some way evaluate them for my wife and kids.  It is just that I don't like to have to do this, because I always thoought I was invincible.  Now I am just scared.

Ralph confused mad

When there are no more choices, tha decision is easy!

Veteran Member

Date Joined Dec 2006
Total Posts : 1986
   Posted 10/19/2007 2:24 PM (GMT -6)   
If you have the surgery, will it be a stoma revision (which may be a short little surgery) or is there a disease process they need to remedy (something taking more time)?

Keep positive thoughts, talk to your cardiologist and anesthesiologist, get some facts, and then make your decision.

In the mean time, don't wast all your time cataloging your books, read them or read a new one. Do things with your family, enjoy your time as much as you can ;0)
49 years old, Crohn's Disease   
Six resection surgeries, permanent ostomy, adverse reactions to Remicadeback on 6MP for maintenance, hoping for a long remission from this last surgery. 

Regular Member

Date Joined Aug 2007
Total Posts : 22
   Posted 10/19/2007 3:46 PM (GMT -6)   
I would definitly get a 2nd opinion on that. Even a third. What do you have to lose. I was told twice that I would die. Once I was in a coma and heard it said. I've always looked at things related to my health in a positive way and I think it helped. Know it did.
You can survive, even thrive more than you know. You are in my prayers.
Sandy B

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2007
Total Posts : 2765
   Posted 10/19/2007 3:55 PM (GMT -6)   
I'm so sorry that you're having to deal with this. sad I agree with Sandy and think you should get a second and third opinion. I will definitely keep you in my prayers.

Veteran Member

Date Joined Aug 2006
Total Posts : 6571
   Posted 10/19/2007 9:36 PM (GMT -6)   
i think another opinion is in order also, and i also think you should spend time doing what you want, not only because of this, but becasue you made it to 82(which is too young to die) and that's something to celebrate in and of itself.
But i will keep you in my thoughts and prayers

Forum Moderator

Date Joined Feb 2003
Total Posts : 1251
   Posted 10/20/2007 1:51 AM (GMT -6)   
I third, the second opinion :)

You're in my thoughts - sending prayers and good vibes to you.
I have had an ileostomy for 31 years now due to UC.
Moderator of the Ostomy Forum
I'm not a complete idiot - some parts of me are missing!

Regular Member

Date Joined Jun 2004
Total Posts : 231
   Posted 10/21/2007 9:35 PM (GMT -6)   

Hi, I think they might not want to risk it for themselves and any liability, but what if you sign a waiver or something.  I see them work on tiny premature babies, who can't breath and have heart problems but they never never give up trying to save them.  I just don't get how they think it is ok to give up on you. You deserve a chance too.   God Bless, and please get another opinion. 



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