husband's extreme fatigue and pain

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Regular Member

Date Joined Aug 2007
Total Posts : 67
   Posted 1/17/2008 1:57 PM (GMT -6)   
confused  Hi everyone: Rob had his Zometa Jan.9/08 and normally doesn't see the side affects, achy, tired etc. for a couple of days. This time he had pain, aching, and tired within a couple of hours of his treatment. Since then he is extremely tired, pale, achy, sometimes pain and twice he has had an ache or pain flow throughout his whole body but in different locations and not all at one time. Ex: last couple of nights he starts to ache or hurt in the upper part of his body, arms, shoulders, chest with no pain or ache in the lower extremities. Than it suddenly switches to his lower part of the body from the waist down to his feet and the upper part stops hurting. This lasts for an hour or two before it subsides and disappears. Does anyone know what can cause this? He isn't all that hungry either. Just absoluetly fatigued. Feels like his muscles are tired and achy also. Can Zometa do this?  I also read and article on Hypercalcemia of malignancy which means that there is too much calcium in the blood. This can occur with bone metastases, due to excessive bone loss. Symptoms include nausea (which he has had on occasion lately and vomiting once) loss of appetite, depression, and fatigue. Just this happening is getting him really down.  His hips aren't doing as well as we hoped after his last radiation either. Can anyone recommend a good video to buy on self visualization so he can try some self healing, as well as a good video on learning relaxation techniques and how to destress himself so he can learn how to not get so extremely stressed over everything that happens or might happen. Even the smallest insignificant normal things get him stressed and his imagination goes beyond. My daughter called me and asked us to stop over and pick up something without telling us what it was. Rob started thinking of all negative things instead of looking at this as maybe a pleasant surprise and simply waiting until we got there to see what it was.  He always thinks the worst or negative and works himself into a state of stress that causes his pain to start when he didn't have any. From there it escalates. Even he now sees that he needs to find a way to handle stress better and learn not to get so involved in things that he can't do anything about. Just hard to change habits. Thanks for your help guys and gals. Hope everyone is doing okay. Keep up the fight. You're in my prayers.  lifeline

Veteran Member

Date Joined Nov 2006
Total Posts : 1464
   Posted 1/17/2008 2:53 PM (GMT -6)   

Hey Lifeline,

I had deep depression due to low testosterone.  Like Rob, I stressed out over even small problems like driving to work.  Every problem got magnified to gigantic proportions and it seemed like I just couldn't get anything to come out right.  I don't have Rob's PCa problems but can relate to his depression and negativity.  My doc put me on Prozac to counter the depression and this made me feel like a zombie.  No feeling and every thing was grey. 

I hope and pray that Rob and you can get some relief someway...


Veteran Member

Date Joined Jun 2005
Total Posts : 528
   Posted 1/17/2008 8:34 PM (GMT -6)   
C'mon Lifeline - I shouldn't have to tell you that you should have called the prescribing doc as soon as he felt the side effects.

As far as the depression goes, I'm obviously not a doctor, but it's just as obvious to me that your husband should be on anti-depressants. I'm on Effexor, and have been for a long time, even before my PCa diagnosis. During my radiation treatments I got REALLY depressed and they increased my dosage of the Effexor. That fixed that problem. It's hard to imagine anyone with cancer not being depressed. Some of us are fortunate enough to be able to deal with it without meds, but for the rest of us, pills are the answer. Just be aware that it might take a while to find the right dosage of the right med - trial and error.

Best wishes.

1/2005 Dx PSA 26.5 Gleason 7 (4+3) @Age 61
1/2005 Start Casodex and Zoladex
7/2005-8/2005 5 weeks of IMRT and then HDR brachy
1/2007 Rad Oncologist orders CT scan of pelvis
because of complaints of pain in both thighs
MRI confirms pain not caused by cancer BUT
1/2007 CT scan of pelvis picks up a nodule at bottom of left lung
5/2007 CT scan of lungs shows 1/2007 nodule has grown and
there are numerous nodules on both lungs.
6/2007 Thoracic surgeon removes wedge of left lung for biopsy
6/2007 Path report says 95% chance of metastatic PCa, but she's
never seen cells like this before.
7/2007 2nd opinion at M.D. Anderson in Houston.
They confirm: mutated PCa, very rare, but seen there 2 or
3 times. Recommendation: have CT scans every 6 weeks
and watch for change. At that point start chemo and will
survive for 22 - 24 months thereafter.

Regular Member

Date Joined Aug 2006
Total Posts : 21
   Posted 1/23/2008 2:33 PM (GMT -6)   
Dear Lifeline - My husband just had a Zometa shot on Friday (1/18).  He always feels as if he has the flu for a couple of days.  He was also very happy go lucky before and now his personality has really changed.  He claims he is not depressed, but he is not the same man I married.  But, yes, after this shot and after the Lupron shot he is always very achy.  He even has problems throughout the month on and off.  Sometimes he cannot even walk or stand without feel nauseated.  My prayers are with you because I know how this terrible PCa changes lives.  We will never live without the thought of cancer out of our minds again. 


Veteran Member

Date Joined May 2006
Total Posts : 2542
   Posted 1/23/2008 3:37 PM (GMT -6)   
Dear Lifeline....

        Thinking of you & Rob at this moment

             ~  and just wanted to let you know

                   Keeping you close in thoughts and prayers!

                           Hugs from Lee & Buddy

Regular Member

Date Joined Jan 2008
Total Posts : 218
   Posted 1/23/2008 4:11 PM (GMT -6)   
I know this depression. It is a time in a man's existence when he know he is no longer in control of his life and he is vulnerable. A time when there are no new horizons only dark valleys to face. I hate it because it is a time when you feel angry especially towards the ones you love because they are seeing you like this. i think you get pushed away by his anger for that reason.

When things got bad for a while my wife hugged my neck and took control of everything making it clear that there is light at the end of the tunnel.

12/06/07 DaVinci and LRP

Regular Member

Date Joined Aug 2006
Total Posts : 21
   Posted 1/24/2008 4:31 PM (GMT -6)   
Since I went to therapist when I had breast cancer, I have wanted my husband to go to my therapist also. He claims he is not depressed, but he has changed. Why don't men talk about things? I also get depressed and am a little angry with him simply because I had wanted him to go the doctor for a number of years and he wouldn't. Now that he is in this position, I just wish I could get him to get some help from drugs or otherwise. Why are our men so stubborn?
Hang in there lifeline, I will be in touch with you soon. Prayers are with you and your husband. Sandy

Tony Crispino
Veteran Member

Date Joined Dec 2006
Total Posts : 8128
   Posted 1/24/2008 9:02 PM (GMT -6)   
Good Point Sandy,
I don't understand this either. And I'm a man. My entry into my blog tonight is about the fact that we guys just all too often are not willing to talk about these things. I am very vocal about it, but I had to admit first that this is a life changing experience. I too have to admit I was stubborn about going to the doctor. In my case it isn't a strong point. Look at my age. I wasn't supposed to be tested for 6 more years. Look at my numbers. That would have sucked had I waited. I mean the guys here are great. But when I see you women post, I always ask, why not him? My brother and I are close, but I would bet he would not want to talk about it. Heck it took 6 months after my surgery to get him in for a PSA. He's 49. Geez. But at least I am trying...

Stubborn Tony....:-)
Age 45 (44 when Dx)
Pre-op PSA was 19.8
Surgery on Feb 16, 2007
Post-Op Pathology was poor: Gleason 4+3=7, 4 positive margins, Stage pT3b (Stage III)
HT began in May, '07 with Lupron and Casodex 50mg
IMRT radiation for 38 Treatments ending August 3, '07
My PSA did drop out after surgery to undetectable.  It has not returned and I will continue HT until January '08.
My Life is supported very well by family and friends like you all.
Visit my journey at:

Regular Member

Date Joined Aug 2007
Total Posts : 67
   Posted 1/27/2008 1:24 PM (GMT -6)   
Hi: thanks everyone for your quick response. Since the last post Rob has had a few partial good days, but these last 3 days are not good and we are so confused.  The ache in his muscles, (i keep asking him is it pain or ache, is it in the bones) he insists it's muscle ache, won't go away unless he takes a hot bath. One day after coming out of the tub he said that he didn't even feel like he was sick. He sounded like his old self. Unfortunately, this only lasted about 10 min. then things went downhill again. I don't get this. Anyone know anything about this. Where Tyenol 3 or 4's worked to help the ache, they no longer work nor does Advil or his Morphine. Sometimes like this morning, he could hardly walk, the muscles don't seem to want to support him. Does anyone know what could be happening. Is it possible that his spinal cord is being affected and is  he getting close to being paralyzed? I know i'm hopefully panicking for no reason. this whole thing started after his last radiation in Dec. when he had a heavy dose for his hips and pelvic and Zometa the same day, then Zometa 3 wks. later. I read info. that after a long time on Zometa and rad. some men can have a reaction to these, dibilitating muscle and joint ache and pain for awhile and have to be taken off Zometa for awhile. Is there anyone out there whose husband has advanced pc. similar to mine who may have gone through the same? We sure could use to know that there is a light however dim coming. I'm wandering, is he reaching the end.  I have printed out so much info. to ask the chemo dr. when we meet with him this coming Tues. I don't think we will have time to discuss everything with him and i feel i'm getting bogged down with info. He isn't losing weight and most times is eating really well.  Can the cancer do the above or is there really hope that it could just be the radiation and Zometa. We are both really needing more hope.  thanks lifeline 

Veteran Member

Date Joined May 2006
Total Posts : 2542
   Posted 1/27/2008 3:13 PM (GMT -6)   

Dear Kathy *Lifeline & Rob ~


Tuesday will be here and hopefully you’ll get some answers… the not knowing is the scariest.

I feel your fear and my heart is filled with thoughts of you ~ as you continue to reach out.  This is so important… so please stay extra close. 


I am wrapping bluebird wings around you both… and I hope the warmth will give you understanding as to how important you and Rob are to all of us. 


I want you to read what you wrote to Sandy….

Partial quote from lifeline to brendafeathers….

Yes, it's a scary journey, but remember, you are not alone. Let all of us help you and be your shoulder to cry or lean on, or your hand to hold.  This kind and caring group of people has helped me so much. Without them I wouldn't get through this. You WILL BE OKAY and make it through this.

lifeline or kathy


Kathy ~ thank you for sharing your name… it allows a deeper connection for all of us!

It’s like putting a face to a name….  You’ve given us a “face”…

And your wording is so true!!!!  Good, Bad, and/or Scary ~ with friends who know… it makes the path less dark.  Each step is wobbly at the moment and hopefully in the near future they will become more stable and you will see that light.  Keeping you extra close at this time in our thoughts and prayers.

Gentle hugs and warm thoughts surround you!  Lee & Buddy

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