At six months, I don't have much to complain about. I have hit zeros twice now, and continent and my health is good. I am still completely impotent. I continue the pump/pill/injection routine, hoping one or all is effective in hurrying the regrowth and repair of the nerves...lol At 61 I ain't no spring chicken, but I still want to scratch in the barnyard and crow occassionally.
My wife is content, she says, with having me well and healthy. We can manage to have sex with artificial help as needed and she seems content with that. What she really feels or thinks, is kept to herself, I suppose....lol Like I told her last night, I don't want to regain function so we can have sex every 2 days or week or whatever. If I could regain it to the point that I could have it when I wanted it, even if only once every 3 months, that is my goal. I want working equipment, even if it isn't practical to use it every day... I don't want to yield a single thing to this disease. I want it all back the way it was before surgery. Impractical, maybe, but everyone's gotta have a goal. If I end up with the pills not working, and having to rely on injections, then so be it, but I ain't giving up the fight yet. Just the fact that we want to have a natural erection after all this is a big deal mentally for most of us in our road to full recovery, I think. Sure, we say we will be satisfied with being cancer free and having dry pants. We have the plan when we begin- first treatment, then continent, then ed overcome. We want to check off each item on our way to full recovery, and it does bear on our state of mind if we aren't completing each one, I think. Maybe not consciously, but sub-consciously, maybe. Deep down I think we want it all, even if we won't say it or admit it to others. Now as has been said, as we age, we begin to put less stress on sex and more on companionship and contentment. This state can be reached by each of us by just the fact of aging, but to have it interrupted by cancer or to not be able to reach this stage because of early age diagnosis seems to bring out our fighting side on a lot of us.
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4/19/07 PSA 7.6, referred to Urologist, recheck 6.7
7/11/07 Biopsy- 16 core samples, size of gland around 76 cc. Staging pT2c
7/17/07 Path report: 3 of 16 PCa, 5% involved, left lobe , GS 3/3:6.
9/24/07 (Open) Retropubic Radical Prostatectomy performed
9/26/07 Post-op Path Report: GS 3+3=6 Staging pT2c, 110gms, margins clear
10/15/07 ED- begin 50mg Viagra and Vacurect pump nightly, Fully continent
01/14/08 Caverject started/stopped, aching. .5ml Bimix started-success
3/24/08 ED- 6 mts.-Viagra, pump, Bimix continues- no response
Post-surgery PSA's:Nov-0, Mar-0