You can visit the Social Security web site and click on the "disability" button. There is a fairly extensive explanation of disabilities that qualify and the procdures for doing so. There is also information on spousal and minor children benefits since you mention that you want to see what can be done for your wife.
Sometimes your employer will also allow a disability claim and early retirement without penalties. I suppose you are covered under the collective bargaining agreement. Take a close look at it to see what is allowed.
Best of luck to you.
Here is the link to the disability site.