There is no shame in needing help. You have been through a lot, with your open surgery, your back pain, and now, if I am reading correctly, marrital problems. Your loss of sexual interest may have nothing to do with any one of your problems, but a combination of all of them. When was the last time your saw your urologist, how did your first post PSA turn out? You should almost be due for your second one too like me.
Do you have family or friends you can talk to? There's always help out there if you feel you need to. If funds are a problem, most areas have good free or low cost mental health clinics, least you could talk through all these issues.
You are on a lot of pain meds, that could be affecting your moods, sexual interests, etc. You have a lot of factors going on there.
And no, it's not just you, each of us here fight our own personal battles on a daily basis, whether it be physical or mental or both, that is very normal. Each person has their own tolerance level and their own ways of dealing with them.
And you can always come here, just like you did now, and get it off your chest and talk through it with the good people here. We are here for each other ,we are here for you.
Hope you get to feeling better, you have a lot on your plate, best thing to do is deal with one small piece at at a time, deal with a piece that you can handle, then move on to the next. If you think about all your problems at once, you will be overcome. Do it in small pieces, that is how I survived all I have been through.
Wishing you better times,
David in SC
ps and being 42, I know that all of this is harder on you still
Age 56, 56 at DX, PSA 7/7 5.8, 7/8 12.3,9/8 14.5
3rd Biopsy Sept 08: Positive 7 of 7 cores, 40-90%, Gleason 7, 4+3
Open RP surgery 11/14/8, Right nerves spared, 4 days hospital, staples out 11/24/8, 5th cath out on 1/19/9
Post-surgery Pathlogy Report:Gleason 3+4=7, pT2c, 42 grm, tumor 20%, Contained in capsular, clear margins, clear lymph nodes
First PSA Post Surgery 2/9 .05, 6 month on 5/9