Here's my take on this issue:
I strongly suspect that the divorce rate is indeed higher for men who are diagnosed with Pca, although that is based on an unscientific survey of people I know who have had or have PCa. Obviously the macro picture doesn't necessarily help analyze or predict the course of a particular relationship.
I am 57, 16 months after surgery. I am living in our garage apartment until our youngest goes off to college in a little over a year. I stay in this unsatisfactory situation because I get to see my daughter more this way than I would otherwise. But after she leaves all bets are off.
We always read these stories about
wives standing by their men no matter what. I am sure that sometimes happens, and bless those who do. But much of the time this stuff about
PCa being a "couple's disease" is bull. Many women marry a man only for as long as he is useful to her [I said "many," not "all."]. This is particularly true where the woman is still young enough to attract another mate.
I have no plans to date and certainly not to remarry; there's no point [which is also why I will not use a pump, shots, etc. to try to restore my sexual performance].
I will focus on other parts of my life until the PCa comes back.
Of course, you may feel differently, izzard2, and if so you have my full support.
P.S. Another aspect of this is the effect of PCa on one's career. I am currently fighting a losing battle to keep my job after a 33 year career - once I returned from treatment, no one at work treated me the same again; I think they feel that they can't give me any long-term projects because they can't be sure I won't get sick again.
[I had significant colon problems at the same time as I had PCa and ended up having six operations in 9 months.]
Post Edited (Zen9) : 11/1/2009 11:12:38 AM (GMT-7)