Mea Culpa and forum decorum

New Topic Post Reply Printable Version
[ << Previous Thread | Next Thread >> ]

Sleepless09
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jul 2009
Total Posts : 1267
   Posted 11/17/2009 12:53 PM (GMT -6)   
Post deleted. 
 
Gone Fishing
 
Sheldon  AKA  Sleepless  
 
 



Age 67 in Apil '09 at news of 4 of 12 cores positive T2B and Gleason 3 + 3 and 5% to 25% PSA 1.5
Re-read of slides in June said Gleason 3 + 4 same four cores 5% to 15%
June 29 daVinci prostatectomy, Dr. Eric Estey, at Royal Alexandra Hospital Edmonton one night stay
Flew home to Winnipeg on July 3 after 5 nights in Ramada Inn  ---  perfect recovery spot!
Catheter out July 9, so far, so good
Final pathology is 3 + 4 Gleason 7, clear margins, clear nodes, T2C, sugeron says report is "excellent"
First post op PSA Sept 09  less than 0.02
PSA on Oct 23 test again less than 0.02
Oct 1st 09 -- dry at night, during day some stress issues, but better every week. 
Feel free to email me at:  sheldonprostate@yahoo.com    

Post Edited (Sleepless09) : 11/17/2009 2:30:05 PM (GMT-7)


Purgatory
Elite Member


Date Joined Oct 2008
Total Posts : 25393
   Posted 11/17/2009 1:30 PM (GMT -6)   
Sheldon, I agree with the general sentiments of what you say here, pretty good portrayal of how a lot of the thought process and emotions fit into this world of PC we are in.

However, there are hard lines that get crossed, and unless a poster is firmly rebuked, it just goes on and on.

That's why there are posted rules here at HW, and most forumns. We agree to abide by those rules when we joined.

Recently (and I want to stress to anyone reading this, that it was not Sheldon) when I was being called a "sissy girl for complaining about going through salvage radiation", among other insults. That crossed the line of decency.

What a terrible thing to say to any brother here going through treatments and procedures. We each have our own trials and battles, our pains and our sorrows, our victories and defeats with PC. I thought the whole idea was to support each other and encourage each other.

To the person that said that and much more to me over the weekend, you did serious damage. Words can and do hurt, contrary to popular opinion.

In my fight, going through salvage radiation has been a big deal. I knew it ahead of time, I knew it from going thorugh 35 rounds of neck/throat radiation in the past. I am also going through it while dealing with a long term SP catheter, which complicates the whole radiation process. So on a night when I had bloody catheter bags, back to back bladder spasms all day long, combined with the normal nausea, fatigue, and soreness associated with completing the first 30 sessions of radiation, yeah, it hurt to be equated that way. And it was an insult to every woman that posts on our board.

What was the solution, all the posts were simply censorsed and deleted. That makes the guilty look innocent and the innocent look quilty one and the same.

I found what happened to be entirely cruel and cold, can't imagine anyone going through what any of go through here in our PC journeys to have to suffer that kind of indignity. And to top it all off, they get away with it, once again.

I have said my peace, won't add another word to it. If this is justice at HW, then I don't need HW anymore, my purposes have ended.
All I am asking is for the agreed upon rules to be enforced.

David in SC
Age: 57, 56 dx, PSA: 7/07 5.8, 7/08 12.3, 9/08 14.5, 10/08 16.3
3rd Biopsy: 9/08 - 7/7 Positive, 40-90% Cancer, Gleason 4+3
Open RP: 11/08, Rht nerves saved, 4 days in hospt, on catheters for 63 days, 5th one out 1/09
Path Rpt: Gleason 3+4, pT2c, 42g, 20% cancer, 1 pos margin
Post Surgery  PSA: 2/09 .05,5/09 .1, 6/09 .11. 8/09 .16
Latest: 7/9 met 2 rad. oncl, 7/9 cath #6 - blockage, 8/9 2nd corr surgery, 8/9 cath #7 out  38 days, 9/9 - met 3rd rad. oncl., mapped  9/9, 10/1 - 3rd corr. surgery - SP cath/hard dialation, 10/5 - began IMRT SRT - 39 sess/72 gys cath #8 33 days, 11/2- SP Cath #9 in place


Steve n Dallas
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2008
Total Posts : 4849
   Posted 11/17/2009 1:47 PM (GMT -6)   

As much as we like helping each other - this site isn't big enough for all of us and some of us need to go...

Name calling is a capital offense in my opinion nono


LV-TX
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jul 2008
Total Posts : 966
   Posted 11/17/2009 1:53 PM (GMT -6)   
Sheldon and David...forgive me here, as I didn't visit the website over the weekend so I have no idea what this is all about. But from what you two wrote is very accurate and needed to be said. As my mother always told me, if you can't say something nice, then don't say it at all...and to follow up with that, she reminded me that when you cross the line, you need to apologize for your action.

Hopefully whatever it was gets resolved so that all can move forward. This is a great community of caring folks and I for one gain so much information even though most of the issues I am not involved in or have encountered myself. But how else could I learn if someone doesn't share that information.

Both of you hang in there, this is just another bump in the roads we all travel and I appreciate all that you guys do here.
You are beating back cancer, so hold your head up with dignity
 
Les
 
Age 58 at Diagnosis
Oct 2006 - PSA 2.6 - DRE Normal
May 2008 - PSA 4.6 - DRE Normal / TRUS normal
July 2008 - Biopsy 4 of 12 Positive 5 - 30% Involved Bilateral w/PNI - Gleason (3+3)6 Stage T1C
Robotic Surgery Sept 18, 2008
Pathology October 1, 2008 - Gleason 7 (3+4) Staged pT2c NO MX - Gland 50 cc
Seminal Vesicles and Lymph Nodes clear
Positive Margins Right Posterior Lobe
PSA 5 week Oct 2008 <.05
                   3 month Jan 2009 .06
                   6 month Apr 2009 .06
                   9 month Jul  2009 .08
                 12 month Oct 2009 .09 


60Michael
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2009
Total Posts : 2243
   Posted 11/17/2009 2:07 PM (GMT -6)   
On Facebook you can hit "block" or ignore if you dont wish to chat with someone. On here we must be the one to ignore as there is no button. Will leave it to the moderators to do what they need to do if someone violates the rules. Putying my energy into correcting someone is energy that is better put somewhere else. I do have to say that most of the time we are very supportive of one another. Just my two cents.
Michael
Dx with PCA 12/08 2 out of 12 cores positive
59 yo when diagnosed
Robotic surgery 5/09 Atlanta, Ga
Catheter out after 10 days
Gleason upgraded to 3+5, volume less than 10%
Margins not involved
2 pads per day, 1 depends but getting better,
8/5 1 depend at night only
 started ED tx 7/17, slow go
Great family
Michael


Tudpock18
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2008
Total Posts : 4274
   Posted 11/17/2009 2:10 PM (GMT -6)   

Hey Guys:

Well, I guess I missed all of the excitement by not checking in over the weekend.  However, I gather from David's post on this thread that the comments were ugly and out of line.  I think I know the offending party from past issues but can really only guess at that...

I believe Sheldon describes some good reasons why someone may behave badly on this forum but, IMHO, this is still no excuse for such behavior.  Some of us spoke about tolerance in a recent thread about religious references and I believe that word is appropriate to describe what we all have a right to expect when posting here.  I think it is fine to disagree and even do so in a blunt and straightforward manner.  However, when such disagreement is not expressed in a respectful and tolerant manner, I think the moderators should be swift and stern in their actions. 

Tudpock


Age 62, Gleason 4 +3 = 7, T1C, PSA 4.2, 2 of 16 cores cancerous, 27cc
Brachytherapy December 9, 2008.  73 Iodine-125 seeds.  Procedure went great, catheter out before I went home, only minor discomfort.  Regular activities resumed, everything continues to function normally as of 9/1/09.  6 month PSA  1.4 and my docs are "delighted"!

Worried Guy
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jul 2009
Total Posts : 3742
   Posted 11/17/2009 2:30 PM (GMT -6)   
A couple of people spoke about the "block button". Where/what is it? I must be really dumb.
Jeff

Steve n Dallas
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2008
Total Posts : 4849
   Posted 11/17/2009 2:36 PM (GMT -6)   
JEFF
Put you mouse pointer on the THUMBS DOWN button in the upper right hand corner of someone's post...

Sleepless09
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jul 2009
Total Posts : 1267
   Posted 11/17/2009 2:42 PM (GMT -6)   
Note: I have made an explanatory edit at the top of my initial post in this thread I should have made clear at the outset. Apologies.

Sheldon AKA Sleepless
Age 67 in Apil '09 at news of 4 of 12 cores positive T2B and Gleason 3 + 3 and 5% to 25% PSA 1.5
Re-read of slides in June said Gleason 3 + 4 same four cores 5% to 15%
June 29 daVinci prostatectomy, Dr. Eric Estey, at Royal Alexandra Hospital Edmonton one night stay
Flew home to Winnipeg on July 3 after 5 nights in Ramada Inn  ---  perfect recovery spot!
Catheter out July 9, so far, so good
Final pathology is 3 + 4 Gleason 7, clear margins, clear nodes, T2C, sugeron says report is "excellent"
First post op PSA Sept 09  less than 0.02
PSA on Oct 23 test again less than 0.02
Oct 1st 09 -- dry at night, during day some stress issues, but better every week. 
Feel free to email me at:  sheldonprostate@yahoo.com    


Purgatory
Elite Member


Date Joined Oct 2008
Total Posts : 25393
   Posted 11/17/2009 4:10 PM (GMT -6)   
Sheldon, I wasnt try to take away from your post. I am in agreement with your logic. I was only trying to add a real example where even when people have good reasons to do bad things, it isnt always easy just to make the damage go away.

Your points were well spoken and eloquent. Liked them.

THank you.

David in SC
Age: 57, 56 dx, PSA: 7/07 5.8, 7/08 12.3, 9/08 14.5, 10/08 16.3
3rd Biopsy: 9/08 - 7/7 Positive, 40-90% Cancer, Gleason 4+3
Open RP: 11/08, Rht nerves saved, 4 days in hospt, on catheters for 63 days, 5th one out 1/09
Path Rpt: Gleason 3+4, pT2c, 42g, 20% cancer, 1 pos margin
Post Surgery  PSA: 2/09 .05,5/09 .1, 6/09 .11. 8/09 .16
Latest: 7/9 met 2 rad. oncl, 7/9 cath #6 - blockage, 8/9 2nd corr surgery, 8/9 cath #7 out  38 days, 9/9 - met 3rd rad. oncl., mapped  9/9, 10/1 - 3rd corr. surgery - SP cath/hard dialation, 10/5 - began IMRT SRT - 39 sess/72 gys cath #8 33 days, 11/2- SP Cath #9 in place


James C.
Veteran Member


Date Joined Aug 2007
Total Posts : 4463
   Posted 11/17/2009 4:11 PM (GMT -6)   
As I explained in my post, there is not much that can be done about the situation NOW. The person , the only person who is qualified to ban a member, the owner- Peter_ is out of the loop now, recovering from surgery. He is the only person who can do anything. In the meantime, all we moderators can do is try to clean up the damage, and keep the flames from spreading. That does require that both side of any argument be removed. I explained that in the other thread. I really see no value of opening another discussion of it here or in any other thread. There is nothing to be done for now, so let's accept that and move on. As Tony said, we mods can't ban, we can only make our private recommendations to Peter and he is the one who will decide if he will ban someone from HIS website forum. So, please, lets try to minimize the damage and move on.
James C. Age 62
Co-Moderator- Prostate Cancer Forum
4/07 PSA 7.6, referred to Urologist, recheck 6.7
7/07 Biopsy: 3 of 16 PCa, 5% involved, left lobe, GS 3/3=6
9/07 Nerve sparing open RRP 110gms.- Path Report: GS 3+3=6 Stg. pT2c, 110gms, margins clear
24 mts: PSA's: .04 each test since surgery, Bimix .3ml PRN or Trimix .15ml PRN


Purgatory
Elite Member


Date Joined Oct 2008
Total Posts : 25393
   Posted 11/17/2009 4:19 PM (GMT -6)   
James, hope your mother is doing better. Hope Peter is recovering too. On my end, I will try even harder not to take the bait next time, I try hard not too, but sometimes things go over the edge of reason and restraint. But I will try.

Thanks for your intervention in any event.

David in SC
Age: 57, 56 dx, PSA: 7/07 5.8, 7/08 12.3, 9/08 14.5, 10/08 16.3
3rd Biopsy: 9/08 - 7/7 Positive, 40-90% Cancer, Gleason 4+3
Open RP: 11/08, Rht nerves saved, 4 days in hospt, on catheters for 63 days, 5th one out 1/09
Path Rpt: Gleason 3+4, pT2c, 42g, 20% cancer, 1 pos margin
Post Surgery  PSA: 2/09 .05,5/09 .1, 6/09 .11. 8/09 .16
Latest: 7/9 met 2 rad. oncl, 7/9 cath #6 - blockage, 8/9 2nd corr surgery, 8/9 cath #7 out  38 days, 9/9 - met 3rd rad. oncl., mapped  9/9, 10/1 - 3rd corr. surgery - SP cath/hard dialation, 10/5 - began IMRT SRT - 39 sess/72 gys cath #8 33 days, 11/2- SP Cath #9 in place


Ziggy9
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jul 2008
Total Posts : 981
   Posted 11/17/2009 4:24 PM (GMT -6)   
First of all I have no idea what happened this weekend, but before anyone is banned, banished, ostracized etc.. Get a grip people.

Dave no one should call you sissy for what you are going through. But when you make over 3600 posts in a year you make yourself a target by being THE major poster here. It comes with the frequency of posting. That's internet human nature. I'm not going to say anymore, being I didn't read the thread. For I can't comment on anything more than I know factually.

This forum deserves better than to be a cool kids clique with the most popular getting special treatment. It's about PCa after all, not egos.
Diagnosed 11/08/07 - Age: 58 - 3 of 12 @5%
Psa: 2.3 - 3+3=6 - Size: 34g -T-2-A
 
2/22/08 - 3D Mapping Saturation Biopsy - 1 of 45 @2% - Psa:2.1 - 3+3=6 - 28g after taking Avodart - Catheter for 1 day -Good Candidate for TFT(Targeted Focal Therapy) Cryosurgery(Ice Balls) - Clinical Research Study
 
4/22/08 - TFT performed at University of Colorado Medical Center - Catheter for 4 days - Slight soreness for 2 weeks but afterward life returns as normal
 
7/30/08 - Psa: .32
11/10/08 - Psa.62 - Not unexpected bounce after the 80% drop the quarter earlier. Along with urine flow readings, an acceptable amount left in bladder measured by sonic. Results warrant skipping third quarter tests, and to return April, 2009 for final biopsy scheduled to
complete clinical research study 
 
April 2009 12 of 12 Negative biopsy
10/12/09 - Psa .30
 
 
 


Purgatory
Elite Member


Date Joined Oct 2008
Total Posts : 25393
   Posted 11/17/2009 4:50 PM (GMT -6)   
I dont seek or get special treatment, nor do I want any. As a writer, this is just my natural medium, and perhaps I have more time on my hands then others. But the number of posts isn't a contest, at least not to me. I have said many times before here. I get far more from the brothers here, then I ever give back, despite the number of posts. I have learned so much in my time here. If we were doing this by telephone, you would never hear from me, as I hate being on the phone, even with those I love or like, lol.

Everybody has their own style, and we should respect that. We are all different and the same at the same time, but united through our Prostate Cancer. That is what it is all about to me.

David in SC
Age: 57, 56 dx, PSA: 7/07 5.8, 7/08 12.3, 9/08 14.5, 10/08 16.3
3rd Biopsy: 9/08 - 7/7 Positive, 40-90% Cancer, Gleason 4+3
Open RP: 11/08, Rht nerves saved, 4 days in hospt, on catheters for 63 days, 5th one out 1/09
Path Rpt: Gleason 3+4, pT2c, 42g, 20% cancer, 1 pos margin
Post Surgery  PSA: 2/09 .05,5/09 .1, 6/09 .11. 8/09 .16
Latest: 7/9 met 2 rad. oncl, 7/9 cath #6 - blockage, 8/9 2nd corr surgery, 8/9 cath #7 out  38 days, 9/9 - met 3rd rad. oncl., mapped  9/9, 10/1 - 3rd corr. surgery - SP cath/hard dialation, 10/5 - began IMRT SRT - 39 sess/72 gys cath #8 33 days, 11/2- SP Cath #9 in place

New Topic Post Reply Printable Version
Forum Information
Currently it is Monday, September 24, 2018 4:35 AM (GMT -6)
There are a total of 3,005,994 posts in 329,291 threads.
View Active Threads


Who's Online
This forum has 161818 registered members. Please welcome our newest member, demonsss.
207 Guest(s), 0 Registered Member(s) are currently online.  Details