radiation treatments

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polfred
Regular Member


Date Joined Dec 2009
Total Posts : 62
   Posted 1/21/2010 11:05 PM (GMT -6)   
Hello everyone,
My husband just started his radiation treatments today. I'm praying everything goes well. I'm kinda sad because he prefers to go by himself. I'm trying not to take it personally, because I know that its not about me. Just wanted to vent. Bless you all.
Jan
Age 59
PSA 9 on-08-09
Given antibiotics for 1 month/
PSA 10 on 10-09
Biopsy 11-18-09-Results 10 of 12 cores positive
CT and Bone scan negative
Diagnosed on 11-20-09
Lupron injection/ 7 dys of casodex on 11-20-09
Markers placed on 12-15-09
Planning scan scheduled 1-18-2010/ 8 wks radiation to follow
 


Sonny3
Veteran Member


Date Joined Aug 2009
Total Posts : 2448
   Posted 1/21/2010 11:18 PM (GMT -6)   
Jan,

I can't speak for your husband, but as you know from this forum, I just completed my rad treatment last Friday.

My wife and I went together the first 10 treatments because she was receiving rad at the same time. After that I went by myself also. It wasn't because I did not want her there. The treatments were so quick that I was there and back in about 1:15hrs with driving time. It seemed to me that it would be a lot of trouble for her to get dressed, put on makeup and all just to ride down and back with me. I mean that's all it would have been, just the ride.

Maybe your husband really is thinking of you and knows what you have been through with all of this already. Maybe he is thinking of the inconvenience and bother to you and is just trying to save you that. My wife wanted to go but saw the value in my thinking as well.

Talk to him, it could be a combination of his thinking of you and just wanting to go and get this done without a lot of fuss. I know that it became kinda automatic for me after my wife stopped going. Just zip in and out and count one more treatment off the list.

Best of luck to you and your husband,

Sonny
60 years old when diagnosed
PSA 11/07 3.0
PSA 5/09 6.4
Diagnosis confirmed July 9, 2009
12 Needle Biopsy = 9 clear , 3 postive
Gleason Score (3+4) 7 in all positive cores
da Vinci 9/17/09
Post Surgery Pathology: GS 4+3=7
Stage: T3a
Tumor Volume 12.5%
positive margin, extra-prostatic extension
30 day PSA 0.4, 50 day psa 0.53, 64 day psa 0.6
IMRT completed 1/15/10 35 treatments- 70Gy


goodlife
Veteran Member


Date Joined May 2009
Total Posts : 2692
   Posted 1/21/2010 11:19 PM (GMT -6)   
Jan,
 
I have said this before on this forum, that I as a male feel as tho sickness is a weakness,  Males are supposed to be strong, the leader, the one who takes care of everyone else.
 
When we are sick, it is a blow to our ego and self esteem.  It takes a while for us to build it back up.
 
Meanwhile, we don't like a lot of mothering and worrying.  We want to handle it ourselves.
 
I would say just let your husband be as self sufficient as you can.  Just so he knows you love and care for him, and are there if he needs it.  Sometimes just a snuggle together, a hand in his, or a walk outside is enough to help him through.  This is a big jolt to our system.  Our mortality, our future, our relationships all become kind of jumbled until we can sort it out.
 
Just give him time.  He'll be OK.  Maybe in a few weeks he will invite you along, but if he doesn;t, don't take it personally.  It is just his way of handling it.
 
Good luck to both of you.  It has been said before here, this is a couples disease.  Our partners have to bear a lot of pain and suffering too.  But you can make the difference here, just let it happen.
 
Goodlife
Age 58, PSA 4.47 Biopsy - 2/12 cores , Gleason 4 + 5 = 9
Da Vinci, Cleveland Clinic  4/14/09   Nerves spared, but carved up a little.
0/23 lymph nodes involved  pT3a NO MX
Catheter and 2 stints in ureters for 2 weeks .
Neg Margins, bladder neck negative
Living the Good Life, cancer free  6 week PSA  <.03
3 month PSA <.01 (different lab)
5 month PSA <.03 (undetectable)
6 Month PSA <.01
1 pad a day, no progress on ED.  Trimix injection
No pads, 1/1/10


Geebra
Regular Member


Date Joined May 2009
Total Posts : 476
   Posted 1/21/2010 11:38 PM (GMT -6)   
I did not want my wife to go either. As Sonny said, what's the point. It was a long ride 1.5 hours each way for me. It is uneventful, painless and quick. I did not want her to bother.
Father died from poorly differentiated PCa @ 78 - normal PSA and DRE
5 biopsies over 4 years negative while PSA going from 3.8 to 28
Dx Nov 2007, age 46, PSA 29, Gleason 4+4=8
Decided to participate in clinical trial at Duke - 6 rounds of chemo (Taxotere + Avastin)
PSA prior to treatment 1/8/2008 is 33.90, bounced on 1/31/2008 to 38.20, and down at the end of the treatment (4/24/2008) to 20.60
RRP at Duke (Dr. Moul) on 6/16/2008, Gleason downgraded 4+3=7, T3a N0MX, focal extraprostatic extension, two small positive margins
PSA undetectable for 8 months, then 2/6/2009 0.10, 4/26/2009 0.17, 5/22/2009 0.20, 6/11/2009 0.27
ADT (ongoing, duration TBD): Lupron started 6/22/2009
Salvage IMRT to prostate bed and pelvis - 72gy over 40 treatments finished 10/21/2009
PSA 6/25/2009 0.1, T=516, 7/23/2009 <0.05, T<10, 10/21/2009 <0.05, T<10


zachattack
Regular Member


Date Joined Dec 2009
Total Posts : 97
   Posted 1/22/2010 5:01 AM (GMT -6)   
Jan,I just started my radiation yesterday.My wife goes with me every time I go.We get there sit for a couple of minutes and I go back ,get my treatment and leave.She never even sees whats going on.I enjoy the company,but I know she would rather be doing something else with her time.DO NOT TAKE ANYTHING HE DOES WHILE THIS THING IS ON HIS MIND PERSONNEL ,ALL I CAN SAY IS GOD BLESS THE WIVES AND FAMILY THAT PUT UP WITH US WHILE WE ARE NOT OURSELVES.And by all means take time for yourself.

Zach
age 55dx 12-2008,psa at biopsy 8.6
biopsy 12/12 gleason 3+4=7
da vinci surgery 6-09 nerve sparing by DR. John W. Scott (my hero)
Hospital 3 days cath 7days still leaking from cough(bad lungs)
still have ed may be the hormones.
9-09 psa 2.2 hormone inj
10-09 nuclear bone scan no results yet I will have gold markers placed 12-29-09
start rad 1-10-10
organ confined
extracapsular seminal vesicle involvement
lymph node involvement


60Michael
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2009
Total Posts : 2243
   Posted 1/22/2010 8:57 AM (GMT -6)   
Jan,
I went to my wife's chemo tx's 15 years ago but they were not as frequent. My IMRT tx's are five days a week and I am in and out in less than 30 minutes. I did not want her to have to take off work, and if I am honest with myself, Goodlifes comments also apply to me. Hope the best for his tx and your life together.
Michael
Dx with PCA 12/08 2 out of 12 cores positive 4.5 psa
59 yo when diagnosed
Robotic surgery 5/09 Atlanta, Ga
Catheter out after 10 days
Gleason upgraded to 3+5, volume less than 10%
Margin slightly involved
2 pads per day, 1 depends but getting better,
8/5 1 depend at night only, now none
 started ED tx 7/17, slow go
Post op dx of neuropathy
3 months psa.01, 6 month psa.4, 6 1/2 month psa.5
Starting IMRT on 1/18/10
Great family and friends
Michael


Purgatory
Elite Member


Date Joined Oct 2008
Total Posts : 25393
   Posted 1/22/2010 10:08 AM (GMT -6)   
With my wife being a nurse, working a set shift, with a lot of responsibilities, there was no reason for her to have her work day disrupted for 8 weeks. I made new friends at the clinic, the various patients waiting, some I shared stories about here, and had a chance or two to educate a few people about PC while waiting around. If I was so ill that I needed someone to take me, I had two sons on the ready, that would have dropped what they were doing to take me there and home again.

My wife did come on #39 of #39, because she had a day off, and just wanted to see the place that tied me up for 2 months. I took her, and she was impressed with both the hardware and the caliber of care with the staff.

There's no right or wrong on this subject. And I don't buy the "tough guy" act, and "men want to do it alone" bit ,as that's just generalizing. We are all different, and all react to things differently. I tend to be honest, open, and transparent with my feelings, whether they are good or bad. If I hurt, I hurt, not going to pretend different. If I need help, I will ask for it politely.

David in SC
Age: 57, 56 dx, PSA: 7/07 5.8, 7/08 12.3, 9/08 14.5, 10/08 16.3
3rd Biopsy: 9/08 - 7/7 Positive, 40-90% Cancer, Gleason 4+3
Open RP: 11/08, Rht nerves saved, 4 days in hospt, on catheters for 63 days, 5th one out 1/09
Path Rpt: Gleason 3+4, pT2c, 42g, 20% cancer, 1 pos margin
Incontinence:  1 Month     ED:  Non issue at any point post surgery
Post Surgery  PSA: 2/09 .05,5/09 .1, 6/09 .11. 8/09 .16
Post SRT PSA: 1/10 .12
Latest: 7/9 met 2 rad. oncl, 7/9 cath #6 - blockage, 8/9 2nd corr surgery, 8/9 cath #7 out 38 days, 9/9 - met 3rd rad. oncl., mapped  9/9, 10/1 - 3rd corr. surgery - SP cath/hard dialation, 10/5 - 11/27 IMRT SRT 39 sess/72 gys ,cath #8 33 days, Cath #9 35 days, 12/7 - Cath #10 43 days, 1/10 - Corrective Surgery #4, and Caths #11 and #12 in at the same time


polfred
Regular Member


Date Joined Dec 2009
Total Posts : 62
   Posted 1/22/2010 10:21 AM (GMT -6)   
turn Thank you'll so much for your comments. I feel better already. My husbands treatments are scheduled for 8:30 in the morning. We live in Bossier Louisiana and the cancer treatment center is only 12 minutes away from our home.  I am self employed so I can be very flexible with my hours at the office. I do understand his need to maintain his independence, and I do respect his position on this matter. Again thank all of you. Hope you have a healthy and prosperous year.
Will keep you posted.
jan 
Age 59
PSA 9 on-08-09
Given antibiotics for 1 month/
PSA 10 on 10-09
Biopsy 11-18-09-Results 10 of 12 cores positive
CT and Bone scan negative
Diagnosed on 11-20-09
Lupron injection/ 7 dys of casodex on 11-20-09
Markers placed on 12-15-09
Planning scan scheduled 1-18-2010/ 8 wks radiation to follow
 


Galileo
Veteran Member


Date Joined Nov 2008
Total Posts : 697
   Posted 1/22/2010 11:19 AM (GMT -6)   
My wife never went with me to treatments. The sessions were during regular work hours for both of us, and they were (to me) not very eventful. Kind of a nice break in the morning, actually.
So maybe, like the other responder wrote, that's your husband's mindset also--no reason to disrupt your day.

She did go with me on the initial consultation with the radiation oncologist, an event where I was extremely anxious. Having her there helped. She went with me to the first couple of followups, but now I don't bother her with those, either. Those are pretty routine, too, since I always find out my PSA before the actual appointment.

I brought my son into the treatments one day, so he could watch from the control booth. I was hoping to inspire him to study hard and go into some kind of medical field. No sign of such inspiration yet. rolleyes
Galileo

Dx Feb 2006, PSA 9 @age 43
RRP Apr 2006 - Gleason 3+4, T2c, NX MX, pos margins
PSA 5/06 <0.1, 8/06 0.2, 12/06 0.6, 1/07 0.7.
Salvage radiation (IMRT) total dose 70.2 Gy, Jan-Mar 2007@ age 44
PSA 6/07 0.1, 9/07 and thereafter <0.1
http://pcabefore50.blogspot.com


Ed C. (Old67)
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2009
Total Posts : 2461
   Posted 1/23/2010 10:19 AM (GMT -6)   
Jan,
I wish you and your husband the best. My wife worries more about my PSA results than I do but tries not to show it. It is always reassuring to have a caring wife who supports us while we fight PCa.
Age: 67 at Dx on 12/30/08
PSA 9/05 1.15; 8/06 1.45; 12/07 2.41; 8/08 3.9; 11/08 3.5 free PSA 11%
2 cores out of 12 were positive Gleason (4+4) and (4+5)
Negative CT scan and bone scan done on 1/16
Robotic surgery performed 2/9/09 Dr Fagin, Austin TX
Pathology report:
Prostate weighed 57 grams size:5.2 x 5.0 x 4.9 cm
Posterior lateral lesions measuring 1.5 x 1.4 x 1.0 cm showing focal capsular penetration over a distance of 3mm in circumference.
Prostatic adenocarciroma accounts for approx. 10-20% of the hemisphere.
Gleason 4+4
both nerve bundles removed,
pT3a Nx Mx, Negative margins
seminal vesicles clean, lymph nodes: not dissected
continent after 4 months
8 weeks PSA test 4/7/09 result <0.1
5 months PSA test 7/9/09 result <0.1
8 months PSA test 10/9/09 result <0.1


polfred
Regular Member


Date Joined Dec 2009
Total Posts : 62
   Posted 1/23/2010 1:45 PM (GMT -6)   
turn Hi Everyone,
My husband's first two days went pretty well.  Due to his Parkinson's, it takes him extra time to get dressed. He sometimes struggle with little things like trying to put his wallet in his back pocket, buttons, and putting on his shirts. Putting on his shoes usually takes about 5 or 10 minutes. I've bought  him sweat pants and sweat shirts with a little extra room in them, but he said it still took him longer than he liked to get undressed for his treatment.  He told me that there are separate dressing rooms for the men and the women, so even if I accompanied him I couldn't go in the men's dressing area.  Asking for assistance from staff is out of the question. (ego thing). He did say that later on in the day after the treatment that he had a funny taste in his mouth. Thanks for listening.
jan 
Age 59
PSA 9 on-08-09
Given antibiotics for 1 month/
PSA 10 on 10-09
Biopsy 11-18-09-Results 10 of 12 cores positive
CT and Bone scan negative
Diagnosed on 11-20-09
Lupron injection/ 7 dys of casodex on 11-20-09
Markers placed on 12-15-09
Planning scan scheduled 1-18-2010/ 8 wks radiation to follow
 


60Michael
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2009
Total Posts : 2243
   Posted 1/23/2010 2:25 PM (GMT -6)   
Jan,
I am happy that he is at least discussing his tx with you. That is a good sign and maybe not all that you want, but hopefully you all will grow together thru all of this.
Michael
Dx with PCA 12/08 2 out of 12 cores positive 4.5 psa
59 yo when diagnosed
Robotic surgery 5/09 Atlanta, Ga
Catheter out after 10 days
Gleason upgraded to 3+5, volume less than 10%
Margin slightly involved
2 pads per day, 1 depends but getting better,
8/5 1 depend at night only, now none
 started ED tx 7/17, slow go
Post op dx of neuropathy
3 months psa.01, 6 month psa.4, 6 1/2 month psa.5
Starting IMRT on 1/18/10
Great family and friends
Michael

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