Doing little things that the drs. don't tell you. Purchase several pairs of hip-hop pants that either button or zip all the way up on the outer part of the leg, sold a sporting goods stores:Dick's, Dunhams, a note pad and pen for questions to ask drs.
men's guards, chucks, white wash clothes and many of them, ice and ice bags chances are that his scrotum will be swollen and this is normal so try not to be alarmed, soup, throat losenges, vinegar for rinsing the catheter, light meals, tylenol, surgical dressing and tape, vasoline for catheter or surgilube, no matter what your husband says make sure he uses it. My husband insisted that it didn't work and refused to use it, until his penis was so sore and irritated that he was in tears and couldn't walk. alcohol pads for cleaning the tip of the catheter. Loose fitting briefs for after the catheter comes out, his abdomen will be swollen and tender anything tight fitting will be painful. I hate to say it but male Depends, for the first couple of days after the catheter comes out. My husband also used the Depends with the tabs not the pull up type while the catheter was still in so that he could feel somewhat human. A vegetable laxative such as Senna any kind of pain medication will cause constipation, and constipation is very painful after a prostatectomy and suppositories are a big no-no after surgery.Also depression is extremely common for men after a prostatectomy even though they won't admit to it.
Get little things to keep him busy while in bed, card games, pc games an exersize band and stress squeeze balls. Also, get something for yourself, this is a very difficult time for both of you. You need to keep yourself strong for him, he will go through the physical pain, but you will go through pain as well. If you need the time to cry, showers are a great help.Have him get a hair cut the day before and trim toenails, rubber sole slippers toes enclosed. Things to watch out for post op check the tubing of the catheter freguently make sure it is flowing signs of build up are salt like chrystals in the tubing it and it became cloudy and thick looking
You may need some type of reminder when catheter when catheter comes out that he needs to urinate every 2 hours, my husband initially didn't have the sensation to urinate and need reminders he felt that he didn't need to go but he did. At first the stream was weak, but gradually gained strength. The only time he had the sensation was night time. Then it was hourly.
My husband still has incontinent issues especially standing still. He is ok when sitting, laying down, or when moving running walking but constant movement but as soon as he stands still there is leakage.
Be his rock, you are the soarse of his strength right now, he probably won't admit it (most men won't). Men generally don't or won't ask questions, so you need to do that for him. I think it's our roles as wives.
Ask when to start ed meds, many drs recommend as soon as catheter comes out. This is to restore natural blood flow and not to achieve an erection. Also manual message to the penis again not to achieve an erection. It is usually 6 to 8 weeks post op before it is ok to start trying to have an erection. He may have successful enough to have sex or he may not it depends on if nerve sparring surgery was able to be done. Also his diet, and physical health also if he smokes or drinks play a role. Even though he may not be able to have an erection, he still will be able to have an orgasm. My husband didn't think he would be able to, but has since found out otherwise.Urine leakage is common during sex, especially during an orgasm it's like urine replaces ejaculate. And at about
the same force and amount.
A really helpful sight the I found was Ladies only prostate.org this is an online support group. This is a group of wonderful ladies that will provide you with support, you can ask anything or say anything they are wonderful.
The best of luck to both of you.
April 09 PSA 3.2
May 09 DRE enlarged prostate
July 09 PSA 5.2
July 09 Biopsy 5 out of 12 malignant
Gleason score: Primary 3, Seconary 4 Total 7
August 24, 2009
Radical Open Prostatectomy Andocarcinoma of the prostate
% of 4 and/or 5: 1-25%
% of 3 76-90%
Androgen deprivation effect: Negative
Apical involvement: Positive
Apical marginal involvement: Negative
Extraprostatic extension (EPE): Negative
Bladder Neck Shave: Negative
Areas of involvement: Right and Left lateral, posterolateral and posterior and left anterior apex and mid prostate
Principle area of involvement: Right and left lateral, posterolateral and posterior apex and mid prostate
Volume: Medium(100 Sq mm)
Ejaculatory Duct: Negative
Seminal vesicles involvment (SVI): Negative
Vas deferens N/A
High Grade PIN: Positive
Neuroendocrine differentiation: Negative
Pathologic Stage: pT2c NO MX