Your pep talk is queued up. I know you as a friend and I'll always be there to help. My motto here at HW is "Stay Positive". I can't stress enough how much I believe in the power of positive thinking.
Some of the next steps might actually be far more tolerable than that run on ADT. There is plenty of reasons to be motivated to look into them. One of my favorite pictures in all of Facebook, is you with your grand daughter.
And it's important to note that I noticed several different feelings while my hormone balances changed. What I felt one day, changed quite a bit as time moved on. For example, with my T levels getting closer to normal, I am completely intolerant of HGTV and shoe sales. And I just bought a new ATV and I still haven't read or asked any directions.
Hang in there Todd! Love you my friend and keep the faith!