142, thank your mother. My PC has somehow brought my mother and I closer together than we had been the past 25 years or so. At almost 83, I don't think she likes the idea of one of her chlldren dealing with a serious ailment such as PC. Parents never like to think ahead that they may indeed out live their children. Years ago, I use to joke about how my mother would be 90 and going well, and that I would die before I was 65. Only as a joke. Now that I am going on 58 this year, and with my current situation, not quite so unbelievable anymore.
I agree with you, I am never jealous of someone else's good forturne, as each human life must travel its own natural path, but I know what you mean. Nothing has been simple or easy with me since I found out that I had PC. No, I don't feel like I have been picked to suffer more, as there are so many brothers in advanced situations that make any of my sufferings pale in comparisom. And so far ,I am not one of the unfortunate 28,000 plus that die each year because of this cursed cancer.
The closest I had to "normal" since this journey began for me, was from March - June of last year. I had recovered pretty good from my open surgery, had spent 63 days at that time on catheters, had a corrective surgery (my first), was fully continent, and by some miracle of miracle, never had an ED issue at any point. So that was 4 reasonably good months ,during which time, my wife and I took a long overdue real vacation out of state (FL), and I spent the the spring time busy restoring a vintage RV trailer, and just starting to get back into my life.
But from July of last year, until now, its been one set back and ordeal after the other. More blockages, 4 more corrective surgeries, SRT that has done a lot of damage, and 10 more catheters added to the mix.
So that's 11 months now, where I don't have a normal day, or even a single pain free day. Yet, I still have to be a good husband, good father, good grandfather, still have to seek work, still have to accomplish something every single day, or else I feel totally useless to myself and others.
Yes, I am a person of faith, but even that has been pushed to its limits at times. I get sick of seeing so many terrible acting people, that have plush lives where on the surface, they never have to suffer bad health or hard financial times. They treat others so poorly, yet their lives are "blessed" on the outside. Sorry, ranting a bit again.
David in SC
Age: 57, 56 dx, PSA: 7/07 5.8, 7/08 12.3, 9/08 14.5, 10/08 16.3
3rd Biopsy: 9/08 - 7/7 Positive, 40-90% Cancer, Gleason 4+3
Open RP: 11/08, Rht nerves saved, 4 days in hospt, on catheters for 63 days, 5th one out 1/09
Path Rpt: Gleason 3+4, pT2c, 42g, 20% cancer, 1 pos margin
Incontinence: 1 Month ED: Non issue at any point post surgery, no problem post SRT
Post Surgery PSA: 2/09 .05,5/09 .1, 6/09 .11. 8/09 .16
Post SRT PSA: 1/10 .12, 4/8 .04, next one: July
Latest: 7/9 met 2 rad. oncl, 7/9 cath #6 - blockage, 8/9 2nd corr surgery, 8/9 cath #7 out 38 days, 9/9 - met 3rd rad. oncl., mapped 9/9, 10/1 - 3rd corr. surgery - SP cath/hard dialation, 10/5 - 11/27 IMRT SRT 39 sess/72 gys ,cath #8 33 days, Cath #9 35 days, 12/7 - Cath #10 43 days, 1/19 - Corr Surgery #4, Caths #11 and #12 same time, 2/8-Cath #11 out - 21 days, 3/2- Cath #12 out - 41 days, 3/2- Corr Surgery #5, 3/6 Cath #13 out - 4 days, Cath #14- 27 days, Cath #15 - 26 days, Cath #16 - 4/23 put in