Posted 8/9/2010 6:07 PM (GMT -6)
Todd, I know you are scared, and I know you are sad. I am feeling both things toward you. I haven't been able to get life insurance for over 10 years because of cancers. I haven't worked in over 2 years now, and still unable to. What my wife and I have been doing, is paying down and off of any debts we can. I am fortunate in that she is a skilled nurse, and makes as much money as I was when I was working. I hate all the financial burden being on her, instead of me like it was for decades before. I am trying to make sure that she will be able to be self-supportive financially if I were to ultimately pass from this disease. That's all I can do right now, so, to the best of my abilities, I have become her full time house servant, I try my best to do all housework, cleaning, laundry, most cooking, shopping, etc, so that when my poor wife gets home from her 10-12 hour shifts, she doesn't have to do any thing but rest and enjoy being home. Makes me feel of value too. To her at least.
Sounds like you are doing the best you can too with what you have to work with. You got my e-mail here, I would consent to talk to you by phone if you think that would help. I talk to a handful of the brothers here on a regular basis.
My own personal fear, is not that of dying, I am pragmatic about that part, we all have to die one day, some day, of something, whether it be PC or a heart attack or getting hit by lightning. I just worry about my wife and family too, because we are all close knit.
I feel your hurt, brother, I really do, and it slays me that I am not in any kind of position to directly help you in some meaningful way. We are already brothers of the PC, and friends too. I will watch out for you, you watch out for me, and we will keep this fighting spirit going.
May some peace come to your heart.
David in SC