the blare of 70s music and buzz of the radiation machine was replaced by pomp and circumstance and my wife and some of the girls came into the radiation chamber and congratulated me as i lay of the carbon fiber table clutching a large rubber chew ring at my chest, my shorts at half mast.
i removed my legs from the casting for the last time, pulled up my shorts and swung off the table. one of the technicians placed a mortar board on my head, handed me a "diploma" and then another gal took my picture. i was hugged and congratulated.
now i am a cynical b*stard but i was truly touched by the graduation ceremony -- even tho i figured my IGRT treatment cost someone about $200 a minute. most of all i was relieved that i would no longer be irradiated. by that night a supposed jock itch below my pubic tattoo would bubble up into a second degree burn ... something i was told would not happen. toward the end the IGRT machine was freaking me out. at times i imagined that it was straying too long at one of 10 designated targets or that it hit some targets twice. i felt like screaming out a few times but i didn't. near the end of IGRT, my fear of the radiation machine outweighed my fear of the future.
i saw my doctor again after i relieved myself and he pumped my hand and gave me a pep talk. he wrote me a prescription for twenty 100mg viagra tablets at my request. the pills aren't covered by my insurance and cost $450 plus tax....say what? the pills will be for rehab that the doc says isn't really necessary in my case -- only rehab because i will get my last 3-month shot of lupron in 2.5 weeks; i have had no desire or erection for months. i will see this doctor again in a month and hopefully my urinary issues (mostly night time frequency) will be relieved to the point where we can consider discontinuing or cutting back on flomax.
i plan to stay on ambien and celexa until after our trip to maui in december. i'll need to taper off both drugs but i am in no hurry.
my dx was in february and i took my first shot of lupron in march. i had 40 cesium seeds implanted in my smallish prostate in may and my second shot of lupron a couple of days later. i was hit with the double whammy. the following month or so i had the worst side effects of my combination-treatment journey, and as soon as i started feeling a bit better i began the 28-dose IGRT treatment.
i've gained 20 lbs and my body does not regulate heat well. i get exhausted very easily. i've lost my passion for my hobbies but i still do weight training and aerobics. i now have two parakeets in my home office and they make me happy. i'm fearful yet optimistic at the same time. it's been a tough year for me and my wife but i think we handled it well. i know what to expect from the next shot of lupron and my goal is to just keep moving and not gain anymore weight.
PSA on 10/09: 6.8
no symptoms, no prostate enlargement
12/12 cores positive....gleason 3+4 = 7
ADT, brachy and IGRT
Post Edited (F8) : 8/29/2010 1:54:11 PM (GMT-6)