When to start a sex life again ?

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Regular Member

Date Joined Jan 2011
Total Posts : 126
   Posted 1/11/2011 9:50 PM (GMT -6)   
I suppose this subject is a regular one in here but i have two parts to it ...

Firstly, how long after prostate removal is a safe period before trying to have intercourse again ?

Secondly, if using ED medication to gain an erection, has anyone had a problem with straining where they rejoin the uretha to the bladder ?

Prior to my surgery i already had ED and was self injecting with CAVERJECT (alprostadil) which gave me a full erection for a considerable time, obviously i want to try this again but i am very wary of trying too soon and straining my pipework repair but also know that if i leave it too long, that scar tissue will not stretch.

I wondered what your experiences where as you went through this period ?

Prostate problems since early 40s
April 2007 biopsy & all clear
July 2010 prostate swollen more, psa up to 5.6 August 6.7
September Biopsy again
October 7th diagnosed cancer, Gleason grade 6 at 10% mass
December 13th 2010 open radical proctatectomy
Pathology results came back Gleason grade 7 at 12% mass BUT clear margins
Catheter out Jan 5th 2011, Jan 12th down to 1 pad at night & 2 in the day

Elite Member

Date Joined Oct 2008
Total Posts : 25393
   Posted 1/11/2011 9:54 PM (GMT -6)   
Bob, the how long before part of your question and the "strain" issue is best answered by your surgeon. That would vary so very much patient by patient.

Since you had ED before surgery, and were use to injections, when the time is right, sounds like you are already a step up on the process.

Age: 58, 56 dx, PSA: 7/07 5.8, 10/08 16.3
3rd Biopsy: 9/08 7 of 7 Positive, 40-90%, Gleason 4+3
open RP: 11/08, on catheters for 101 days
Path Rpt: Gleason 3+4, pT2c, 42g, 20% cancer, 1 pos marg
Incont & ED: None
Post Surgery PSA: 2/09 .05,5/09 .1, 6/09 .11. 8/09 .16
Post SRT PSA: 1/10 .12, 4/8 .04, 8/6 .06 11/10 Not taking it
Latest: 6 Corr Surgeries to Bladder Neck, SP Catheter since 10/1/9, SRT 39 Sess/72 gy ended 11/09, 21 Catheters, Ileal Conduit Surgery 9/23/10

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2009
Total Posts : 1267
   Posted 1/11/2011 10:41 PM (GMT -6)   
"Mad dogs and Englishmen go out in the midday sun." Noel Coward

I don't mean to be disrespectful, EnglishBob, quite the opposite. You're barely off the table and making plans. Ah, how I envy the energy of the young.

Good on you!

Sheldon AKA Sleepless
Age 67 in Apil '09 at news of 4 of 12 cores positive T2B and Gleason 3 + 3 and 5% to 25% PSA 1.5
Re-read of slides in June said Gleason 3 + 4 same four cores 5% to 15%
June 29 daVinci prostatectomy, Dr. Eric Estey, at Royal Alexandra Hospital Edmonton one night stay
From "knock out" to wake up in recovery less than two hours.  Actual surgery 70 minutes
Flew home to Winnipeg on July 3 after 5 nights in Ramada Inn  ---  perfect recovery spot!
Catheter out July 9
Final pathology is 3 + 4 Gleason 7, clear margins, clear nodes, T2C, sugeron says report is "excellent"
Oct 1st 09 -- dry at night, during day some stress issues.
Oct 31st padless 24/7 
First post op PSA Sept 09  less than 0.02
PSA on Oct 23, 2009 less than 0.02
PSA on Jan 8, 2010  less than 0.02
PSA on April 9, 2010 less than 0.02 
PSA on July 9, 2010 (one year) less than 0.02

Cajun Jeff
Veteran Member

Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 4119
   Posted 1/11/2011 11:09 PM (GMT -6)   
I think my Dr told me 6 wks. but I could be wrong. It did not matter for me because at 6 wks there was nothing. Best of luck with recovery. Sounds like your doing great.

Cajun jeff
9/08 PSA 5.4 referred to Urologist
9/08 Biopsy: GS 3+4=7 1 positive core in 12 1% cancer core
10/08 Nerve-Sparing open radicalSurgery Path Report Downgrade 3+3=6 GS Stage pT2c margins clea
r3 month: PSA <0.1
19th month: PSA <0.1
2 year PSA <0.1
Only issue at this time is ED but getting better

Regular Member

Date Joined Aug 2010
Total Posts : 121
   Posted 1/11/2011 11:18 PM (GMT -6)   
When my surgeon removed the catheter, he gave me samples and a subscription for Cialis, then counseled my wife and I to at least try before returning for my six week check up. Fortunately, we more than tried before the six weeks. To be honest I think we pushed the situation a bit, but without any ill effects.
Age 61, Diagnosed July 2010
PSA 04/09 - 2.5; 05/10 - 3.7; 07/10 - 4.7
DRE and Ultrasound - Negative
Size at biopsy - 32 grams
T1C, 3+3=6, 1 core of 12 60% positive
da Vinci nerve sparing RP 10/29/10
Post op biopsy indicated bilateral Gleason 6 tumors
Continent 90% and hopeful
Minor ED - 85% naturally, 95% with Cialis
6 week PSA - "undetectable"

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2010
Total Posts : 3892
   Posted 1/12/2011 12:00 AM (GMT -6)   
With some men, depending on their new plumbing configuration, their semen is replaced with urine..You might want to be ready for that possibility..
Age 68.
PSA at age 55: 3.5, DRE normal. Advice, "Keep an eye on it".
age 58: 4.5
" 61: 5.2
" 64: 7.5, DRE "Abnormal"
" 65: 8.5, " normal", biopsy, 12 core, negative...
" 66 9.0 "normal", 2ed biopsy, negative, BPH, Proscar
" 67 4.5 DRE "normal"
" 68 7.0 third biopsy positive, 4 out of 12, G-6,7, 9
RRP Sept 3 2010, pos margin, one pos vesicle nodes neg. Post Op PSA 0.9 SRT, HT NOW

Father of Two
New Member

Date Joined Dec 2010
Total Posts : 14
   Posted 1/13/2011 3:56 PM (GMT -6)   
I was wondering this myself.  I feel ready to try sex, but so far, not even a hint of an erection.  I'm only three weeks post-op, so I understand perfectly well that time will likely heal all wounds, but still...  I have told my wife on a few occasions that I have a mental erection but I'm ready for the real thing.  I haven't yet tried medication because my doctor prescribes only after one month, but even then, I don't know what to expect as I had never had an issue in that area before my surgery.

Sorry for the rmablings, this is all still very new to me...

Regular Member

Date Joined Jan 2011
Total Posts : 126
   Posted 1/14/2011 4:17 AM (GMT -6)   
My erections were not great prior to surgery so if it is going to stay like that, then i am cool with it, i just needed some ideas as to when it was safe to self inject my meds again, i have this vision of straining the join in my Uretha which makes me cringe yet i am eager to try again,
As to the ejaculate, if i stimulate myself i do squirt urine which took me by suprise and i have disscussed this with my wife and she says it is fine, she is not worried about it at all
Take care, Bob.
Age 58
Prostate problems since early 40s
Ed since early 40s
April 2007 biopsy & all clear
July 2010 prostate swollen more, psa up to 5.6 August 6.7
September Biopsy again
October 7th diagnosed cancer, Gleason grade 6 at 10% mass
December 13th 2010 open radical proctatectomy
Pathology results came back Gleason grade 7 at 12% mass BUT clear margins
Catheter out Jan 5th 2011

Regular Member

Date Joined Jun 2010
Total Posts : 192
   Posted 1/14/2011 8:18 AM (GMT -6)   
I leaked a bit at orgasm when I first started back at sex however as my continence improved so did the leakage, I am now totally dry with sex. Make sure you urinate prior and it helps if you cut down on fluid intake a couple of hours before.

Regular Member

Date Joined Apr 2009
Total Posts : 179
   Posted 1/14/2011 1:15 PM (GMT -6)   
I waited 10 days after surgery but only because of the catheter.
63 yo
V10.46 Dx Feb-09

RRP 5-5-09

No adverse SE

PSA still zero after 18 months.

Thriving, not just surviving!
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