thanks, don - pro - and bronson
i try to be positive for everyone elses pc case, because it helps keep the thoughts off my own. yeah, a bit bummed, been raining all day here (always depresses me on cloudy days, could never live in seattle or places like that), plus took my wife and daugther to airport this morning as they are visiting relatives in St. Petersburg, FL for a full week. This is the longest my wife and I have been apart since this whole PC mess started, and the longest time I will have to deal with my stoma device on my own.
i have thought the same thought, could try ht, and if it proves to be too problematic for me, then of course i could stop it. if i had had ED as the result of the surgery or srt, i could have accepted that, because it would have been expected, but i didnt and i dont. so i cant get my mind set on doing the chemical castration thing of my own free will. at my age, sex is not number one in my priorities, but still somewhat important. i would not choose death at the expense of having sex.
i hate being out of work for over 2 years now, and none of my doctors will certify me fit to work. i was at the peak of my "game" when all this hit me, and had no intention of being forced out of the work force at age 56 (at dx), my wife, good woman that she is, has never complained even one time about that part. but makes me feel like crap, because i have always been the sole provider or main provider for most of our nearly 37 years of marriage.
i was not prepared for PC to knock me down this hard, caught me off guard, and there is only "x" i can do about my situation.
again, not looking for a hanky or a pity-pat, just trying to deal with what i guess will be my new reality. it would also help if social security would stop jerking me around after all this time, i paid into the system for 43 years, and still havent gotten the first disability check yet, got a good lawyer now, but i shouldnt have to go through that. my lawsuit, is as slow as molasses, typical with legal matters, and even my VA agent orange disability has been lingering for nearly 2 years, a lot of us navy guys have a harder time getting approved, because of minute technicalities.
six month after this urinary bypass surgery, i am barely physically funciontial for short periods of time, and thats after 5 months of being very compliant at out patient physical therapy.
i will stop while i am ahead, i know there are guys much worse off than me. just trying to see some positive trend at some point, thus far, that has not happened. sorry if i am venting.
david in sc
Age: 58, 56 dx, PSA: 7/07 5.8, 10/08 16.3
3rd Biopsy: 9/08 7 of 7 Positive, 40-90%, Gleason 4+3
open RP: 11/08, on catheters for 101 days
Path Rpt: Gleason 3+4, pT2c, 42g, 20% cancer, 1 pos marg
Incont & ED: None
Post Surgery PSA: 2/09 .05,5/09 .1, 6/09 .11. 8/09 .16
Post SRT PSA: 1/10 .12, 4/8 .04, 8/6 .06 2/11 1.24
Latest: 6 Corr Surgeries to Bladder Neck, SP Catheter since 10/1/9, SRT 39 Sess/72 gy ended 11/09, 21 Catheters, Ileal Conduit Surgery 9/10,