Your story and details of retention and strictures is all too scary in how much it resembles what I experienced. Before I had my bladder by-pass surgery last September, I had been on a total of 21 different catheters, had 6 corrective surgeries (including 2 laser), and 2 emergency dialations, and 1 ER visit. For me, the problem was chronic, not temporary. I was not deemed suitable for self-cathing, as there was too much chance of damaging myself.
I am not your doctor, nor pretend to have any special knowledge, but with your description, I do not below that Flowmax would help you. My uro was very patient with me, and that's why we did a total of 6 ops to try to solve the problem. However, and this is important, each time he did one, he warned me that there is a chance with the corrections, that it could leave me incontinent, and in my case, it could take away my rare lack of ED. There was a risk.
I think I would want to talk it over more with your doc, the Flowmax isn't going to hurt you to try it, but it sounds like you may be more on the chronic path with your problem.
I wish you luck, I know first hand the hell and pain you must have gone through to this point.
If you need any more advice based on my experiences in this area, be more than happy to help you.
David in SC
Age: 58, 56 dx, PSA: 7/07 5.8, 10/08 16.3
3rd Biopsy: 9/08 7 of 7 Positive, 40-90%, Gleason 4+3
open RP: 11/08, on catheters for 101 days
Path Rpt: Gleason 3+4, pT2c, 42g, 20% cancer, 1 pos margin
Incont & ED: None
Post Surgery PSA: 2/09 .05,5/09 .1, 6/09 .11. 8/09 .16
Post SRT PSA: 1/10 .12, 4/8 .04, 8/6 .06, 2/11 1.24, 4/11 3.81
Latest: 6 Corr Surgeries to Bladder Neck, SP Catheter since 10/1/9, SRT 39 Sess/72 gy ended 11/09, 21 Catheters, Ileal Conduit Surgery 9/10