I am very sorry you had such a rough ride and outcome. It is tough when life throws a really hard curve ball. But, I learned that one rises to challenge even if that challenge seemed unimaginable a short term earlier.
My left ureter was accidently blocked during the original surgery. Over the next two months, twice they tried to insert a stent but could not get through the blockage. I spent those two months with a nephrostomy tube and leg bag. (I even took a business trip like that.) Ultimately, they opened me back up and re-implanted the ureter .. two more weeks with a catheter, 6 weeks with a stent. In some ways that was as hard as the original surgery but recovery was ultimately faster.
My original Gleason was 7 but was upgraded to 9 after surgery. Other than the ureter, the surgery outcome was better than expected. In pre-op, the surgeon essesntially predicted he would not finish the surgery because of expected spread but he would do his best. We were all blown away, that with a PSA in the 50s, the lymph nodes were clean. By the way, I had consulted with my rad oncologist prior to surgery. He is a strong proponent of getting the cancer out even if radiation is recommended.
Believe or not, I feel fortunate at this point. Had I waited another 6-12 months to get that PSA (my first) I probably would have had mets.
Age 51; dx at 50~10/2010 PSA 54.9
Nerve sparing RRP 12/2010; removed 14 lymph nodes
Pathology report: T3bN0MX, SVI, neg margin, G9
Dry at 2 months
Ureteral re-implantation surgery 2/25/2011
AHT, up to 3 yr: Lupron 11/22/10, 3/14/11, 7/11/11
All HT SE (including total ED) but still good libido; success w VED
Began ART 7/20/2011
Undetectable PSA so far