I can image how things are as lack of orgasm is my biggest problem besides leaking of urine during sex. (leakage would seem like a price worth paying if the sex still resulted in an orgasm, and there are occasions when I don't leak.)
Lack of build up to sex is often the case with me too, again, partly because of leaking, as we have to factor in the risk of leaks, and thus have make sure we are in a suitable place first. (so no sex in elevators - just kidding!).
However, since surgery (and SRT) I now often find that the trick to having an enjoyable time is to forget about
my own pleasure and concentrate on my wife's and then even though the orgasm is still missing there are a lot of good sensations to be had.
04/09 PSA 8.6, DRE neg. Biop 2/12 pos. G6
07/09 RALP in Amsterdam
PostOp G=3+4 Bladder neck & SVI -T3b. No PNI No vasc.inv. Clear margins
09/09 No pads
07/12 1 pad per day
11/09 PSA 0.1
03/10 PSA 0.4 04/10 CT.
Summer/10 66Gy SRT
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