I don't get men either and I are one. ;)
The best thing my wife told me was, "We're in this together and we'll get through this together." The best thing she did was to go to the appointments with me and was just, 'there.' She listened, took notes, asked questions - looked the other way for some exams... Just knowing she was there was a big comfort to me.
My wife knows my mood very well and would just wait till I was ready to talk but then I am a talker and it doesn't take long for my to lay out how I feel.
Should you let him know you're anxious? Maybe, a little but having your own support group would be good too. A lot of us guys are 'fixers.' A woman tells us a problem and we feel like we have to fix it. Light blub out, I'll fix that. Wife feeling anxious - I'll fix that is the first thought I have (even though I have no clue how to do that, I'll get stressed if I can't). The most difficult communications lesson I've had to learn with my wife is that sometimes she is just saying how she's feeling and I don't need to do anything other than listen - turn my problem solver brain off and just listen with maybe a hug later.
Maybe you just need to tell your husband once it awhile - "I am anxious, but you don't need to fix it" or something like that.
Not sure if that is at all helpful - just a few thoughts that come to mind.
All the best,
I'll be in the shop.
PSA 4.2 10/11, 1.9 6/12, 1.2 12/12
2 out of 14 cores positive
Treatment IGRT - 2/2012My latest blog post