Talk to anyone that works full time for the terminally ill. My wife sees this all the time. Often, family members that can't deal with losing a loved one, forces the patient to prolong their life for their benefit, instead of what the patient either wants, or is in the best interest of the patient. Making them suffer even longer, especially if it's clear that these last minute attempts will not really prolong the life, or cause the patient to linger on for all the wrong reasons.
This is why my wife and I have living wills, and have all the nitty gritty details all worked out. It's not a question of giving up or quitting per say, it has to do with true quality of life, and the right to die with dignity. Often well meaning family members are in deep denial with the approaching death of a loved one, and can make well meaning but ill advised medical requests at the end.
Not talking about
some dogmatic statement or position here, it is a personal choice issue. The terminal person should be the one with the last word, assuming they are not in a coma or too demented to know what is going on.
Also don't see this as a right or wrong thing, just something to think about
for the future. I ask this as a general question, not to any poster in particular. If it were you, what would you want done on your own behalf?
The only certainty on the subject, is like it or not, we all have to die at some point. Death should not be some taboo subject. PC still kills 28k plus men a year, just in this country. In my 5 years plus here at HW PC, we have lost some fine brothers, despite prolonged and heroic battles to the very end, and others here, will die of PC eventually if they stay in touch here long enough. I think its important to devote some time, each person, especially those in advanced stages, to think through the process, and be prepared mentally, emotionally, and physically toward the end. That part of PC, is still reality for some, and should be addressed. The subject may not be the most pleasant, but I don't think avoiding it entirely does people a good service either.
For me, I would rather be in hospice, hopefully at home if possible, with sufficient pain medications, then to be in some last minute desperation move in an ICU, away from home, knowing that its unlikely to meaningful prolong my life. Would rather have those few weeks, to die with dignity on my terms. But that's just me.
Post Edited (Purgatory) : 3/4/2014 9:56:21 PM (GMT-7)