You may remember that I wrote a post few days ago about
my G10 dad getting a break from treatment for 1 month.
Since the day the doctor said he seemed to be in remission and would be checked for the results next month, my dad's behavior is getting totally wired.
Yesterday he was soundly laying in bed, once he heard my little sis. being near his bedroom, he started moaning and asking for help, saying that he is getting paralyzed. Having known that he was totally fine few minutes ago, my sister and I decided to ignore his complains and he fell asleep right away.
Again today I asked him if he has any pain and he said no. I advised him to sit more rather than laying in bed all the time. He immediately came back to bed and tried to sleep.
Then I had to go to the dentist and he was alone at home. When we came back, he was sitting in the hall. I prepared some smoothies for him and he ate it all. (his appetite, hemoglobin and RBC improved since last month). Then he told me that in the morning he was feeling dizzy. I just said hmmm. Then the strangest thing happened: He left to go to his bedroom and I obviously saw that he safely tried to hit the ground, pretending that he cannot get up and called my name. It all happened in front of me and I am sure it was not sudden. I took him and he sat on the bed, saying that he felt dizzy again.
To be honest with you guys, I didn't believed him.
I know that having cancer must cause a hell of emotional and mental pressure on the patient, but believe me, it is also extremely hard for the caregivers and family members. These 2 years I have lived in a real hell and even my relationship with my husband has been affected by my anxiety and severe depression. If I feel better now, that's because I am under medication and I also see a psychiatrist every month. I don't think it is fair to put more pressure on the loved ones like this to take attention (at least this is how I feel seeing him behaving like that once he was told that he is on remission).
Another example: He says he cannot eat but I have seen him taking stuff from the fridge when he thinks we don't see him (which makes me happy, but why?!!!).
I have said it all, but I still feel guilty sending this post as an inner voice keeps saying: what if you are totally wrong?
I had seen some other seniors over 70s in our relatives and neighbors behaving similarly and I am worried that my dad wants to STAY sick to draw attention. What do you think?
Post Edited (Farz53) : 4/20/2019 12:36:01 PM (GMT-6)