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Just cause it's Christmas doesn't mean we can't have jokes

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Posted 12/25/2020 7:02 PM (GMT -7)
Quarantine has turned us into dogs.

We roam the house all day looking for food. We are told "no" if we get too close to strangers. And we get really excited about car rides.
Posted 12/25/2020 7:14 PM (GMT -7)
Breaking News: A large shipment of Viagra was hijacked today. The police are looking for the hardened criminals.
Posted 12/25/2020 10:53 PM (GMT -7)
I'm not in a joking mood.
My computer got hacked
On Christmas Eve!
I am so upset that I have to reset everything and change my credit cards, too.
A warning to all to be careful, especially when choosing a password.
Mine was "beefstew", which ,as I've discovered, is not Stroganoff.
Posted 12/26/2020 3:22 AM (GMT -7)
What size turkey do I need to cook for 12 people and possibly 2 police officers?
Posted 12/26/2020 3:31 AM (GMT -7)
It's hard to explain puns to kleptomaniacs because they always take things literally.

What's the difference between a hippo and a zippo? One is really heavy and the other is a little lighter.

My ex-wife still misses me, but her aim is starting to improve.

Post Edited (DjinTonic) : 12/26/2020 3:35:00 AM (GMT-7)

Posted 12/26/2020 7:39 AM (GMT -7)
Here's a relevant post. Searching

after christmas jokes

gives us

https://www.bing.com/images/search?q=after+christmas+jokes&qpvt=after+christmas+jokes&form=igre&first=1&tsc=imagebasichover
Posted 12/26/2020 7:52 AM (GMT -7)
Speaking of viagra, my Dr questioned me about why I cut the pill into 4 quarters. I told him it's not for sex. I just need a little length to stop peeing on my shoes.
Posted 12/26/2020 8:59 AM (GMT -7)
Been missing the two BB's...perhaps licking their wounds...Its said that vitamin D soothes most post elective wounds...
Come on its entirely appropriate...just because the election is over shouldn't mean we can not joke about it... its healing to be the butt of Christmas toys...as long as yo don't put an "I" out...butt if you must be offended..do it with a chuckle
Posted 12/26/2020 1:50 PM (GMT -7)

logoslidat said...
Been missing the two BB's...perhaps licking their wounds...Its said that vitamin D soothes most post elective wounds...
Come on its entirely appropriate...just because the election is over shouldn't mean we can not joke about it... its healing to be the butt of Christmas toys...as long as yo don't put an "I" out...butt if you must be offended..do it with a chuckle

The presidential election isn't over according to one of the candidates; and there's still an election to be decided in Georgia (the state, not the country)
Posted 12/26/2020 2:28 PM (GMT -7)
I have an admission. I organize tennis play several days a week. Pre-COVID we used to draw cards for the pairings. Now each Sunday I send out the matches in advance for the week. Just to spice things up a bit I usually steal one of the Friday Funnies, insert a player's name into the joke, and send it out. It's been a big hit...so please keep 'em coming.

Jim
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