Sex after surgery

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Psychored
New Member


Date Joined Sep 2006
Total Posts : 9
   Posted 12/5/2006 4:04 PM (GMT -7)   
I never thought to discuss this with my doc, (mainly because I was soooo relieved with the other news) but what has been your experience?

Tamu
Veteran Member


Date Joined Oct 2006
Total Posts : 626
   Posted 12/5/2006 4:23 PM (GMT -7)   
Psychored,

I was told that I could try and have sex after the catheter was gone but most men, including me, are not ready for that due to leakage and the lack of an erection. Sounds like you have done well with the leakage and you are younger then i am so you may be getting erections quicker if not already. My urologist has me on a penile rehabilitation program where I started taking 25 mgs of Viagra on the third week day following surgery and doing this for six days and on the 7th taking 100 mgs and trying to have sex. I have done this for two weeks with little success. I will see my urologist on the 18th and see where we go from here. I believe that if you are up to it go for it.

Tamu
Diagnosed 7/6/06
1 of 10 core samples, 40%
Stage T1c, Gleason 3+3
Da Vinci on 11/01/06
56 Years Old
Post Op Path
Gleason 3+3
Approx. 5% of prostate involved
Prostate Confined, margins clear


Psychored
New Member


Date Joined Sep 2006
Total Posts : 9
   Posted 12/5/2006 6:23 PM (GMT -7)   
Actually, I was a little afraid to see if I could get an erection. I didn't know if there was a waiting period or not. But, there are other things that are pleasing as well!

Tamu
Veteran Member


Date Joined Oct 2006
Total Posts : 626
   Posted 12/5/2006 9:11 PM (GMT -7)   
Yes, I fully agree and that keeps me going. The one good thing is that orgasms do not require an erection and they are just as good as before.

Tamu
Diagnosed 7/6/06
1 of 10 core samples, 40%
Stage T1c, Gleason 3+3
Da Vinci on 11/01/06
56 Years Old
Post Op Path
Gleason 3+3
Approx. 5% of prostate involved
Prostate Confined, margins clear


iggy_pop69
New Member


Date Joined Nov 2006
Total Posts : 11
   Posted 12/6/2006 4:31 AM (GMT -7)   

Ahhhh... sex after prostate removal.... what a novel idea... unfortunately not for me yet... taking cialis and or viagra only makes a pressure build-up and makes my testes ache... sorta like when i was the "young stud" and i had "blue balls" from lack of "nooky".

     I have faith that life will come back to that area...but for now it is only a pipe dream.  I guess it is a small price to pay to avoid the alternative  skull  .  I only hope my wife has the patience to wait... for the "old me" to return.. but...even the desire for sex has faded since the operation. I never thought I would lose desire. As most or many males... it was one of the driving forces of my life yeah .... I am not even interested in looking at pics  on the internet of naked women...   Ah fate... it comes around to bite you in the arse....

As far as getting injections to encourage erections....... I dont think so.... nono the last thing i want to do is to stick a needle in my "sacred" area.

Maybe if i get desperate enough I many try needles or the vacuum... but not at this time....

Post Edited (iggy_pop69) : 12/6/2006 4:42:43 AM (GMT-7)


M. Kat
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 715
   Posted 12/6/2006 5:45 AM (GMT -7)   
yes, we always have this discussion somewhere along someone's recovery. :-) Jeff has not had an erection yet to the point that we can have intercourse, but we do other things to satisfy each other and ourselves. as soon as the catheter was out, he wanted to start working on that. we do get frustrated and impatient, but we are happy that we did what we did. the cancer is gone. Jeff has info on a vacuum therapy system that we are going to pursue. so far he's shying away from the injections. I can't really blame him.

iggy, you've been through a lot and I'm sure your emotions have been all over the place. hang in there (oops, in more ways than one tongue ) things will get better. kat
Husband Jeff 56 years old diagnosed July 27, 2006
PSA 6.5, 2 positive areas in biopsy, Gleason 3+3=6
Radical Retropubic Prostatectomy August 30, 2006
pathology report - all clear - cancer gone
1st post-surgery PSA test 0.1
no more pads Oct 12, 2006
2nd post-surgery PSA test 0.1


daveed
Regular Member


Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 172
   Posted 12/6/2006 10:31 AM (GMT -7)   

pyschored

I have not had an erection yet. Surgery was on Nov 1. Have not approached my wife yet because of leaking. I am sure she wouldn't mind a little leaking HAHAHAHA, yeah right!!!! Did have an orgasm (more than one). The orgasm was a lot more pleasureable and longer lasting than before and also no more clean up!!! Maybe everyone should have their prostae removed

Daveeed


2busymom
Regular Member


Date Joined Nov 2006
Total Posts : 118
   Posted 12/7/2006 9:56 AM (GMT -7)   
At about 3 week after surgery Jeff had an orgasm but was pretty achy afterwards, so we backed off for about a week, when we saw the Dr. and he said it was okay to try whatever. Jeff is taking viagra about every other day, and although it's a bit inconsistant as to any effect, I'm hoping it's still sending blood to those nerves that were tugged on during the surgery, to quicken their healing. Some days there is more "visible" response than others, but we don't really know why. It really is a waiting game. So we practice a lot, and have found that the shower is a great place to do that, because then the leaking is no big deal.

Jeff talked to our urologis this week and he thinks he's right on track with his healing. Even with viagra you can't expect miracles overnight. I think this weekend we're getting a sample of cialis and see if that's any different.

bec
husband Jeff 45 years old, diagnosed 8/25/06
PSA 2.1, 2 of 12 samples at 3% & 4%, involving 1 side of prostate
Gleason 3+3=6 in both samples
laparoscopic radical prost. 10/17/06
cancer in both sides of prostate, positive in one area of margin
first PSA in 1/2007


Psychored
New Member


Date Joined Sep 2006
Total Posts : 9
   Posted 12/7/2006 11:01 AM (GMT -7)   
It's unfortunate we live in such an "immediate gratification" society. While I know in my head it could take a long while, I, like most of you, would prefer a quicker return to some 'normalcy'!

lawink
Veteran Member


Date Joined Oct 2006
Total Posts : 621
   Posted 12/7/2006 1:34 PM (GMT -7)   
Bec - I have to thank you for being up front and sharing the shower suggestion . . .I think you had mentioned it previously as well. It's not something I myself thought of but the "leaking" is an issue here and the shower has turned into something enjoyable and a first for us in many years. . . .did I say it caused an erection . . . .HELL NO . . . but any lengthening or firmness definitely seems to occur in the shower in an upright position. . . .and again, the leaking ceases to be an issue there.

Thanks again!
;o) Linda
Bob (60) had laproscopic prostate surgery on Sept 27, 2006 - 2/12 malignant biopsy samples - gleason 3 + 3 = 6.  Follow up PSA results and pathology results received Nov 14th are NO MORE CANCER!  Gleason changed to a 3 + 4; cancer completely confined to prostate; (even a second more agressive, previously undetected cancer)      PSA UNDETECTABLE.
 
Bob also takes Hydroxyurea to control Polycythemia (elevated red & white cells & platelets) has secondary condition . . Myelofibrosis) -- If anyone has experience or knowledge of these, please post us.


2busymom
Regular Member


Date Joined Nov 2006
Total Posts : 118
   Posted 12/7/2006 2:46 PM (GMT -7)   
You're welcome! Jeff's been doing well with the leaking in everyday situations, but in an intimate situation he concentrates too much on NOT leaking, and it really makes things more uncomfortable both emotionally and physically. And being in an upright position does seem to help (gravity?).

Psychored, I think one of the reasons we expect things to get back to normal so quickly is that you men heal pretty quickly on the outside, (especially with the new procedures) you start to get your energy back and it SEEMS like everything is good to go. If you had major surgery done on your leg or arm and were in a cast for months, and then physical therapy, you would never expect to go back to running or throwing a football or go golfing after 6 weeks, sometimes even after 6 months. about a month after Jeff's surgery I finally watched a Vanderbilt video of the procedure, and it's not pretty! They did so much pulling, cutting and manipulating of tissues that it became much more clear to me why it can take so long for things to heal and get back to normal. We just keep telling ourselves it'll happen - and just think, it'll be like we're all on our honeymoons again - only better because we're older and wiser!

bec
husband Jeff 45 years old, diagnosed 8/25/06
PSA 2.1, 2 of 12 samples at 3% & 4%, involving 1 side of prostate
Gleason 3+3=6 in both samples
laparoscopic radical prost. 10/17/06
cancer in both sides of prostate, positive in one area of margin
first PSA in 1/2007


djhouston
Regular Member


Date Joined Jan 2007
Total Posts : 68
   Posted 1/5/2007 3:54 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi All,
New to the website and thread, and it is good to be here. My old high school friend Tamu told me about it. Facts of my case are on the Tamu Update thread, posted 1-4-2007, but briefly: at age 56 diagnosed on 6/06; PSA of 4.4 after a previous 2.9 triggered biopsy=4 of 12 samples positive-worst was Gleason 4+3=7; daVinci'ed 8/23/06, had leaky anastomosis so catheter stayed 4 weeks; final path was stage T2c but negative margins, nodes, and vesicle, Thank the Lord! However, the right neurovascular bundle had to be cut into; therefore, expect not going to have much fun for 6 mos.-1 year. The doc did plastic surgery with the robot and spliced the nerve, but it is going to take a while to grow back. I am on penile rehab which includes 25 mg Viagra 5 days a week to keep the blood flow up, a full dose (100 mg Viagra or the equivalent of Cialis or Levitra) one day, and 1000 micrograms MUSE the other day (my doc is not ready to go to the shots yet).

Now I love "doing it" as much as the next guy, so I am not trying to be puritanical. But, from what my doc and his nursing staff have drummed into my head, before and after my surgery, I am concerned about what I am reading about people trying to have sex of any kind too soon. Of course, you should do what your doctor tells you, but mine told me not to do anything sexual for 6 weeks after the surgery. No pills, no pumps, no other playing around, and no orgasms by any means. His nurse even told me, though she knew that I had the nerve cut, that if I miraculously got an erection (her words "...if the Lord gives you one..."), don't do anything with it for 6 weeks.

The concern was that movements or muscular contractions would mess up the microscopic stitching inside that the robot did. My team was especially mindful that something could get strained at the newly sewn junction of the free end of the urethra, in front of where the prostate was cut out, to the newly made bladder neck. "Newly made" because, if the job is done correctly, they cut way up into the base of the bladder so that not one prostate cell is left that could turn into cancer. This junction was where a pinhole leak was that kept the cath in me for three extra weeks. But, they told me about this abstaining before the surgery as a warning, before it was determined that I had a leak that needed extra time healing.

So, for what it's worth, again, do what your doctor says, but I wouldn't rush things until you are good and healed there.

dj

biker90
Veteran Member


Date Joined Nov 2006
Total Posts : 1463
   Posted 1/5/2007 4:22 PM (GMT -7)   
On the day he took out the catheter (6 days after surgery) my doc told me to have sex 4 times before my next appointment (3 weeks later). We tried but didn't make it bacause I had a complete "flat tire". Now ( 5 weeks after surgery) I am just starting to see some improvement but nothing useful yet.

Jim
Age 72. Diagnosed 11/03/06. PSA 7.05. Stage T2B Gleason 3+3.
RRP 12/7/06. Nerves and nodes okay.
Pathological stage: T2B. Gleason 3+4. Cancer confined to prostate.
PSA on 1/3/07 - 0.04.  Next PSA on 4/4/07.
 
            "Cancer feeds on fear.  Starve it to death."


cancervivor
New Member


Date Joined Aug 2006
Total Posts : 6
   Posted 1/10/2007 12:39 PM (GMT -7)   
Psychored said...
It's unfortunate we live in such an "immediate gratification" society. While I know in my head it could take a long while, I, like most of you, would prefer a quicker return to some 'normalcy'!
Sorry Psychored, but there will be no return to "normalcy."
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