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Posted 2/13/2007 3:48 PM (GMT -8)
Hi my name is Carissa.  I just found out that my father was diagnosed with prostate cancer yesturday.  I am so scared for him and would like to get some information about the chances of being cured or if he is going to die.  I have heard that this is not a fast growing cancer and that he could lin=ve for many years and not even get treatment.  Is that info true?  Please give me as much information as you can. Thank you!
Posted 2/13/2007 3:59 PM (GMT -8)
Hi Carissa. Sorry that you joined this club, but you found the place to be. My husband Kurt, was diagnosised 2 weeks ago. My father had PCa 15 years ago. I wish this forum was around back then. You will need to get a little information. You need to know his PSA level, gleason score and stage, to start. His age and health are also a factor. This information will help you determine what the best treatment pattern is. PCa is a highly treatable cancer. You can post his stats here, and you will receive tons of wonderful advice from all of the wonderful people here who have been where you are today. As for us, we scheduled surgery today, now as mama bluebird says, there is no looking back. Good luck to you. Courtney
Posted 2/13/2007 5:08 PM (GMT -8)
Carissalynn,

You can tell you are scared and that it is normal but one of the most important elements in you father's treatment is a positive attitude on his part. You go into this believing he is going to be around for many more years to come and convince him of that. Believe me he is doing enough worring for both of you and you must help him with that right now.

Courtney told you what stats give you a good idea of where he is at with PC. Some of the factors will not be available until a biopsy is done. Every time you get some information from the doc, post it on this site and we will tell you what it meant to us.

As you can tell from Courtney, you are about to receive a very rapid education on this. Again, please be positive and right now that will help him more than anything. Personally I believe in prayer as a very important factor but that is up to each individual.

Good Luck and Many people are now pulling for your dad.

Eric
Posted 2/13/2007 5:43 PM (GMT -8)
Hi Carissa,

Sorry you have to be here but this is the place to be for info, support and hope.

There are many treatments for PCa and the one chosen depends on the extent of the cancer. That is why another post asked for your father's stats. Most people put their stats at the bottom of the posts so you can see where we are coming from and which treatment option we chose or are considering.

You have time. Talk to the doctor and ask questions. Write the questions down. This is where this forum can help because you can see what information is needed in order to make decisions. Remember that what we do here is to share our experience, strength and hope - not professional help. (I have not yet seen anyone post their professional credentials on this forum.) You will probably hear from Bluebird. She is our lead cheer leader and will tell you that "Knowledge is Power". So get going with your research here, with his doctor, the internet and any other place that talks about prostate cancer. There are lots of references. As you learn more, the fear will start to subside and hope will take over. This is your darkest hour and things will start to get better from now on...

Jim
Posted 2/13/2007 6:18 PM (GMT -8)
Hi Carissa:  For starters, I would recommend Dr. Peter Scardino's Prostate Book.  You can find it in the bookstores or on Amazon.com etc.  It is an uplifting book with lots of information on PCa and what to do in your search for treatment.  If your dad is as nervous as I was, you should read the book and highlight things that will be of interest to him or read them to him.  Part of the positive attitude is not dwelling on cancer, but with prostate cancer, there are so many options and so much research to do, you have to deal with the "C" word in your face a lot.  In my case, I finally couldn't bear to read about it at times and my wife took over.  I recommend this book highly.  You will find the right treatment.  Post some information about his stage at this point in time and there are many here who will provide good information for you. And yes, PCa is slow-growing and highly-curable and treatable. Go with that thought. Best to you and your dad.  You've found a good site here.
Posted 2/13/2007 6:25 PM (GMT -8)
Thank you for your help.  So far all I know is his PSA which is 8.5 and that the Bx they did is how they confirmed the Ca. He has an appointment tomarrow but does not wnat me to come but I hope to talk him into it before he goes.  I think because I am his daughter he is uncomfortable with me going.  I am trying to be strong for him and he has not seen me upset but boy that is really hard to do when I see him cry or the look of fear in his face.  If he does not allow me to go I am hoping he will at least allow one of my brothers to go.  Also i should mention that 3 years ago he had colon Ca and at that time they romoved the part of his colon that had the Ca and several lymph nodes.  The lymph nodes were all neg and they believe they caught the Ca early in that case.  They also did a Prostate bx at the time because his PSA was elevated but at that time there was no Ca in the prostate.  That is all the info I have now but hopefully tomarrow I will get the rest of the info.  His age is 67 and he has HBP and is diabetic.  Thank you for your info and help.

Posted 2/13/2007 6:36 PM (GMT -8)
Carissa-

I second everything which has been said here. It's also very important that somebody go with him to the doctor. I found that between my anxiety and all the things that came up in discussion with the docs, I was grateful that my wife was with me to remember the things they said, and to ask the questions I'd forgotten to ask.

Try not to make yourselves nuts over this - it doesn't help and it's not necessary.

-Gordy
Posted 2/13/2007 6:52 PM (GMT -8)

Carissa:

Agree that someone should go with your Dad to all appointments to take notes.  Also, be sure you get copies of ALL tests done and keep a file on them.  You will need them at some point in time as you research for a treatment.

Good luck to your family and hang in there. 

Dutch

Posted 2/13/2007 7:31 PM (GMT -8)
Carissa, As I have been there with my dad and am now going through this with my husband, I will 2nd or 3rd or 4th, the importance of having others go to dr's appt.'s. When there is so much info being given out, you will be suprised at the differences people hear. Reassure your dad that you will not stay in the room for any exams, but want to hear the results from the doc. Belief in beating this cancer IS very powerful. If you haven't read or heard of this book, Peace, Love and Healing by Dr. Bernie Segal is a great book. I read it when my dad was diagnosised and actually did a report on it in school and made a 100. Opposite score we want to hear here, but says alot for the book. Courtney
Posted 2/13/2007 7:34 PM (GMT -8)
Carissa,

Have hope. Not just pie-in-the-sky blind "hope" but rather, know that prostate cancer is the most treatable of all cancers. It is seldom fatal.

I'm not saying this to minimize the criticality of proper treatment but to try to help put things into perspective. This is a VERY treatable illness. And treatment modalities have become extremely effective in the last few years. There are many excellent options.

On this forum you will find much wisdom, experience and worthwhile counsel. You'll find sympathetic ears and hearts. I've found that it makes a big difference to talk to others who are or have had the same experience as my own. This is a great place to do that.

Is your dad computer literate? Does he naturally like to explore on the internet? If so, this is a great place to bring his questions and concerns. Here people ask ANYTHING and get straight answers. If he's not comfortable with computers, you can help him, by asking questions, reading, researching and sharing what you learn with him.

Best wishes,

Markus
Posted 2/13/2007 8:29 PM (GMT -8)
Carissa,

At your dad's age almost half of the men have prostate cancer. They may not know it but they have it. The vast majority of them will die with the cancer and not because of it. Your dad's PSA while high is not that high. The Gleason score indicates the aggressiveness of the cancer. The more common Gleason score is 3+3 or 6. Higher numbers indicate more aggressive cancer and lower less. His stage is determined by how the cancer was found. If it was found by a biopsy because of a high PSA then his stage is probably T1c. If the urologist felt it with a Digital Rectal Exam (DRE) then it is a T2a or b. Once you have the Gleason and stage along with the PSA you can go to the Partin Tables with your search engine and get a probability of whether the cancer is confined to the prostate or has moved outside to the seminal vessels and/or lymph nodes. The treatment choice somewhat depends upon this information.

Someone definitely needs to be with your dad at the appointment. On this forum we have heard of many cases where the urologist blows right on by most of the treatment options and then biases what he does which in any small to medium size town is usually open type of surgery. There are some though that will refer patients to larger urologic clinics. I would strongly recommend that your dad seek out a second opinion on treatment choice. There are several choices for treatment. If you would like to do more research go to www.yananow.net and when you enter the site go to mentor experiences. Here you will find the stories of many men listed by their choice of treatment. There are many success stories here.

Good luck and stay with us through your father's journey. If he is not computer savvy print off post from ths site and let him read them.

Tamu
Posted 2/13/2007 10:03 PM (GMT -8)
Hi Carissalyn    &   Loved Ones,                        A    “Special”   Warm Welcome   to   You!   I know we can “all” make Your Journey smoother just by being here for you!   This is truly a great forum!!! ~ You have joined! You are now part our forum family ~ a group of wonderful individuals who are so willing to share their journey with you!     It helps “all of us” ~ to help you ~ if we know where you are on your path. So ~ Please stay with us and take our hand when you need it!   Keep posting.... OKAY!!    We are all here to help you travel the path with prostate cancer.       KNOWLEDGE IS POWER... and POWER conquers fear YOU MAKE THE DECISIONS… YOU HAVE OPTIONS… ~ and ~ Your decision will be the right decision for you!!!     We invite you to visit our personal thread in the signature area below. Our thoughts and prayers will be with you as you continue your search for answers…   In Friendship ~ Lee & Buddy   “God Bless You”   It's a little prayer   ~   "God Bless You" ...but it means so much each day, It means may angels guard you and guide you on your way.     (Direct Link ~ just click on the title below and a new window will open!   Reminder … click on the REFRESH icon once you get there) Helpful Hints for New Members... Hope this helps you! :)     Helpful Hint …..   If you stay on the Thread you just started….   I need information…. Please!!!   Every question you ask will be answered by many members and they will all be in 1 location right here!!!   If you start a new Thread for every question you have… eventually you’ll be looking all over the board for your answers as they move down to page 3,4,5,6… over time.   If you stay on “1” Thread…. Every time you have a question and Every time someone answers… Your Thread will pop back to the top of the forum.   This is a really good thing!!!!!   A complete journal is calmer on the nerves!!!!     The  most  important  thing  is   ….   Keep posting…..     
Posted 2/13/2007 10:18 PM (GMT -8)
Hi Carissa,   Take a deep breath.... and know that there's a lot of us like you out there... and we've been where you are now.    It’s okay to be scared… but once you start gaining the Knowledge about what prostate cancer is and how it can be treated   ….   This KNOWLEDGE will give you Power. And this wonderful POWER…. will take away the fear!!!!   Say the words out loud…. prostate cancer…..    Okay…. Now let it go and get learning….     Please take time and look at the Helpful Hints page for some wonderful links to others who have so caringly shared their journeys.   (direct link ~ just click on the title!   Reminder to click on the REFRESH icon once there)   Helpful Hints for New Members... Hope this helps you! :) Updated 02-05-2007   Our Journey ~ Sharing is Caring       Excerpts from our personal Thread:   listed above…   We decided to share “ Our Journey” in hopes of helping at least 1 person!   If it helps more….   If it helps you!!!!       That will truly be a blessing …   At no time are we writing to tell you what you must do, or what you should do….   Your Decision is Your Decision!!       Just giving you a view of what decisions we made, what the process was for us, and the outcome as of this date.     Read as much as you can on the forum … there are so many different scenarios.   You will gain much knowledge from all of them.   There will be so much coming at you in the next little while… I would suggest the following for any new member:   When you read a posting that you think you might want to re-visit….copy and paste it in a word document.   There are so many postings coming in ~ you may not find it again….   This way you can re-visit it as many times as you like or delete it.   I hope our journal entries will help you.   Ideal scenario: Prostate cancer detected early, treated, and cured.   Prostate cancer doesn’t have to be fatal.   If it’s caught early enough, it is completely curable.                                                                                      Sharing is Caring         The most important thing right now is... take one day at a time.  Reserve your energy because you'll need it.   We will continue to keep you and your family close in thoughts and prayers. In Friendship ~ Lee & Buddy     P.S. Biker90 ~ You are a sweetie!!!!  xoxo
Posted 2/15/2007 3:18 PM (GMT -8)
Ok this is what he found out yesturday. He still did not want me to go but my step mom went with him. The doctor said it was stage 1 and the gleason was 6. He has referred him to a radilogical oncologist but explained some of the different treatment options with him. The doctor said that if he did nothing at all he could probably still live another fifteen years or so. My father is leaning more towards the radiation chips or surgery. He said he plans on out living me so I guess he is feeling a bit better about things or he is trying very hard to hide how is is feeling now. Thank you all so much for the information and I will keep you all updated as we find out more.
Posted 2/15/2007 3:23 PM (GMT -8)
Look into Proton therapy at Loma Linda. They seem to have a very good outcome and many people on here can testify to that. You can also look at www.protonbob.com for patient reports. Good luck to you. My dad didn't like us to go to dr appts either at first. Just important that someone is with him. Courtney
Posted 2/15/2007 4:18 PM (GMT -8)
Carissa, I can only echo what others have said here. it's now time for your dad (and your stepmom and you and your brothers) to research everything, but the bottom line is that it's up to your dad. he has the final say. yes, he'll be afraid and worried, but he'll get through this. so will you. I promise! kat
Posted 2/15/2007 6:55 PM (GMT -8)
Carissa,

Sounds to me like your dad has caught it fairly early and has a very good prognosis. If I was his age when my PC was diagnosed I would have gone with the proton beam. It creates considerable inconvience because you have to go to one of the two or three sites and there are 44 treatments over a nine week time frame. The research that I have done on it indicates almost every man that has gone through it has done very well and little or no side effects. You should relax some now as your dad is going to be around for a long time.

Tamu
Posted 2/16/2007 3:51 PM (GMT -8)
Today has been a better day and now I am starting to relax a little. My dad seems to be ok with it now and has a completly different disposition now that he saw the doctor and got more information. He goes next week to the radiologic oncologist and then we should know more. I am so glad that I had a place to come and find out information thank you. I will let know know what he finds out next week.
Posted 2/16/2007 3:54 PM (GMT -8)

I am also 67 and I am 4 weeks & 4 days post surgery. I had the open radical removel as I wanted the Dr to be able to see what was inside. I am NOT sorry I chose that route, the surgery was not near as bad as I had invisioned it to be My Gleason was 3+3=6 too with one small tumor deep inside left lobe. First you need to get across to your Dad that this does not just involve him that you and your brothers are just as worried as he is. At 67 yrs old the time for modesty is far past and he needs the support of all his family and that means being involved. As I said I am a little over a month post and I have regained about 70% control now. One of the first things that hit him is "feeling sorry for himself" we all went thru that stage. This may seem harsh but the more he finds out the easier it will be for him and all of you.  Best of Luck to all of you.

Jerrio

Posted 2/23/2007 6:38 PM (GMT -8)
Hi I am just stopping by to let you all know what my dad found out at the radiolgic oncologist on Tuesday. I guess the treatment option he has chosen for know is take estrogen to try to shrink the prostate and the get chips put in if it shrinks enough. He said that if that does not work then he would try they radiation next. He liked the doctor and remains in a positive mood. He said the doctor sounded promising that this treatment would work so we will have to wait and see. Thats all I know for now. I hope you are all doing well. Have a wonderful weekend.
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