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Posted 3/20/2007 9:36 AM (GMT -8)
I was going to call this Jetguy Lite because I hope that my big issues with prostate cancer are behind me.  I mean both emotional and physical.  I changed my mind because I don't want it to become trivial. 

One huge bit of progress is that I no longer worry about that which I can't control.  For example, I'm not yet at all concerned about the FAA.  I'll worry about that when the time comes.  I think that less stress promotes more healing. 

Another conclusion I've come to is that my job at this time is to take care of myself.  That is job one for me now.  I am doing just that

I am truly doing what I said in my two previous paragraphs.  I am the most important thing in my life at this time and my stress level is low.  It would be lower if it weren't for those idiots who drive slowly in the left lane.

Time to leave for my treatment.

Regards,

Bill

Hi, Lee!   :-)

Posted 3/20/2007 9:40 AM (GMT -8)
Hi ~ Jetguy!!!      WOW.... your previous Thread:   Jetguy's Page... Welcome Friend   10-29-2006 through 03-19-2007  :) (direct link ~ just click on the title!   Reminder to click on the REFRESH icon once there) ...has 108 reply posts and 3083 Views.... This is awesome!!! It reminds us how important a complete journey is and with you starting with us before the biopsy ~ makes this a truly powerful thread. You said from the 1st day you would stick with us in hopes of helping others.... This has truly been accomplished.... and we all Thank You!!!! You've given all of us a wonderful gift in your sharing!!!!!!  Your post above ~ makes my heart feel really good...  nice direction you're heading in... with all of us walking with you! Take care "special" friend and we are so thankful you've allowed us to walk this journey with you! Hugs from Lee & Buddy
Posted 3/20/2007 3:04 PM (GMT -8)
You go Jetguy! Your post is uplifting beyond belief!
Posted 3/20/2007 3:07 PM (GMT -8)

Bill:

Sounds like you are headed in the right direction with your attitude - just watch that road rage nono .

Dutch

Posted 3/20/2007 3:52 PM (GMT -8)
Hey Piano, I would like to know why my post was uplifting. I'm pleased that it was, but I don't know why. I thought it was kind of boring. I'm not kidding - I want to know why.

Hey Dutch - Screw 'em. Left lane hogs should be shot. : )

Regards,

Bill
Posted 3/20/2007 7:48 PM (GMT -8)
Jetguy -- Your post was uplifting because I am working hard at achieving what you are well on your way toward -- no longer worrying about what I can't control and realizing that less stress promotes more healing. And realizing that my job at this time is to take care of myself, as you said. I spoke to my friend's mom today -- a lady who has known me since I was an infant. I haven't spoken to her in quite a few years. The conversation was very upbeat and she told me I sounded great. I gave her all the good news about my surgery etc. and didn't complain about anything. Then she said, "Tommy you're a worrier and you've been a worrier since you were a tiny little kid. You have to stop worrying and let go -- let some things be out of your hands." I said, "I wish there was an off switch for worry, but there's no such thing." And I was shocked that over the years she has known me as "a worrier." Now, day-by-day, I'm working on it. That's why your post was uplifting -- I can see that someone else is dealing with the same issues. Keep both hands on the wheel!
Posted 3/20/2007 8:25 PM (GMT -8)
Dear JetGuy and PianoMan, For years I said that when I die, my headstone will read "Born Worried," so believe me I know what you are talking about ! Feeling true, positive calm is essential to healing and it is not as easy as saying it will be so. Visualization, meditation, Reiki and other introspective disciplines are a helpful way to tap into that inner peace. There are CD's and tapes to guide one on one's own, or one can get a Reiki treatment at a local alternative healing center, or take restorative yoga classes. There are so many ways to be good to oneself--and relaxation/healing techniques are at the top of my list of recommendations! Kind Regards, Becky
Posted 3/21/2007 3:22 AM (GMT -8)
JetGuy,
I'm so glad you are doing so good and doing for yourself. I think thats great! I wish I had the balls to be like you and just say "screw them I come first!" when it comes to work and my health. But I fear that day will never come. I continue to make dumb descisions when it comes to beating myself up working too hard and long now that I'm able to. Now that I'm feeling better I've turned myself into a workahalic and have been neglecting other more important aspects of my life. Hell, I've even neglected this forum! I should be on here religiously trying to pay back what to this forum and all the good folks here who have helped me so much as well as the newbee's who my experiances may be helpful. Bill, I miss talking to you. The last few posts I've sent your way have gone by with no responce. I really hope I didn't say or do something to piss you off???
Still your friend!!
Pete
Posted 3/21/2007 7:19 AM (GMT -8)

Hi Bill (Fellow Radiation Buddy)!

I just finished responding to your new thread last night and it was wiped away when the HW server went down. I was not pleased--I hope I can reconstruct it!

I loved your message!  I think that a lot of us guys can relate to your feelings and philosophical words. Life will never be quite the same for us again.  In many cases, we will reorder our priorities in life and hopefully spend more time doing the things which are important to us and those we love.  It is time to step back and "smell the roses" and to find the "joie de vie" that may have been missing from our hectic lives before PC. 

I am sure that you are looking forward to the completion of your radiation treatments soon.  I finish my proton treatments on April 17th and can't wait to get my life back again after seven strenuous months between diagnois and completion of my treatment. I am sure that you feel the same way. Cheers and continued good luck!

Dave


Posted 3/21/2007 3:28 PM (GMT -8)

Pete, no way in the world you could piss me off.  I just don't hang around as much as I used to.  I was spending too much time thinking about prostate cancer.  I was close to responding to you and Lee and Swim when I got locked out.  Guess that will teach me to say thank you when I have the opportunity.  Thanks, you all!!!

Glad it's helping, piano.  It's a work in progress, but I'm doing much better.  For example, I always work out on Saturday.  Hardly ever miss.  The last two Sats, I wanted to do some things with some of my buddies, so I blew off the exercise.  Had a ball.  Ate bad food.  Did a bunch of guy stuff.  Felt great.  Is exercising better for me than goofing off with friends and eating improperly?  Not necessarily.  I'm indulging myself a bit and having fun.  Didn't think about cancer for hours.  I'm not certain how I got here, but I'm just not worried about my future at this time.  I'll take care of that in the future! 

I am job one.  I usually help my wife with grandson in the morning.  Last Monday, I blew it off and went shooting with some friends.  Blew off my cardio, too.  Had a great time and did't think about cancer all morning.  I now do my cardio in the morning and lifting in the afternoon.  It means that I'm less help for Jan, but it does me good.  No guilt at all.  If I don't take care of myself, I can't take care of others.

These are just kind of random examples and I hope they help in some way.  I sure feel better having come to this point.  Hope you do too.  'Gotta go help my wife and daughter host their garden club ladies.  eyes

Regards,

Bill

Posted 3/21/2007 4:49 PM (GMT -8)
Hey Bill,

I'm glad to hear you are doing things for yourself. We dedicate a major portion of our post-diagnosis lives dealing with cancer and need to get away from it once in a while. Its good for the mind, emotions and the body. This stuff will always be there and can be dealt with on our terms. It need not dictate our thoughts or emotions and only our actions as far as treatment is concerned. When it is time to start healing, we have to heal all aspects of our lives. Getting out of the "rut" is as important as any workout.

Hey Pete, take it easy buddy. We all miss you around here and your working too hard doesn't help us at all!!!

See ya...

Jim
Posted 3/22/2007 3:22 AM (GMT -8)
Bill- you crack me up with your comments about the way people drive! but I guess you are spending a lot of time on the road. I'm glad you are having fun. I thought women had a hard time putting themselves first. don't ever feel selfish when you do that because if you don't take care of yourself, you are no good to anyone. Piano - it's not easy to stop worrying, but keep telling yourself that 95% of what you worry about won't happen anyway. have a lot of positive self-talk, and yes, you can change. Pete - take care of yourself and don't work so hard. Jeff works way too much and I tell him that all the time....but he doesn't listen to me either. HA! take care guys and keep up the good fight...kat
Posted 3/22/2007 7:17 AM (GMT -8)
Bill,
Thanks for setting me straight! I was in a real state of stress yesterday and I guess it came through in my thread. Jim, you are the best! and as usual your right. Kat, you are always there with a kind word of encouragement for us guys. Thank you all from the bottom of my heart! I don't know, maybe by overloading myself with work, I'm just dealing with other problems caused by other people and like it or not, fixed by yours truely! It takes my mind off other personal problems that continually fill my life. Work is kind of like a drug like that. Stay busy enough and hide from what really counts. I may be exagurating a little and I don't want y'all to get the wrong idea because my life is 100 times better now than when I had low testosterone, it just seems I have my priorities all screwed up! Middle age is so challenging and confusing, especially when you are a member of OUR CLUB! Ain't that right boys & girls? Swim, I miss you too!!
XXXOOOXXX!!!
Pete
Posted 3/23/2007 11:18 AM (GMT -8)
Hey Jetguy - Good luck today!
Posted 3/23/2007 5:06 PM (GMT -8)
      A Nice Day to Reflect…….      Having special thoughts of where we’ve been, where we are, and where we’re going. Our Journeys continue on ~ as we step onto new stepping-stones.   Thank you for allowing us to travel with you… Thank you for being our friend… Thank you for realizing ~ how important you are to you, your family, and to this forum.   Taking care of “You 1 st” ….     allows you to be there for all of us!!   And it was wonderful to see this in your 1 st posting on this new thread….   All we can say… with a huge smile on our face….is.... We’ve come a long way babe!!!!   “Sounds like a song”… Let’s keep singing together…..       Love from Lee & Buddy
Posted 3/24/2007 8:03 AM (GMT -8)

My thanks to all of you for your kind thoughts and words.  I was exhausted yesterday.  Probably a combination of fatigue from the radiation and emotions from it being over.  The girls at the clinic gave me a big hug as I was leaving.  The folks at the club where I work out gave me a nice card and they chipped in and gave me a gift certificate for a massage.  Which I need and was planning to buy.

I went to my local small airport for breakfast again today and one of the guys bought my breakfast.  This is the place where we creatively embellish our flying stories (usually known as lies).  "There I was, running out of airspeed, altitude, and ideas all at the same time."

My daughter and her husband are buying us lunch and then we will mess around the Southlake town square with the cutest baby in the world.  Jan and I were planning to celebrate last night, but I was too tired - in bed and asleep before 8:00.  Maybe tonight. 

I think my biggest surprise is that I never got a speeding ticket in nine weeks of a 70 mile round trip.  Guess I'm getting old, or more careful.  Or more careful 'cause I'm older.  That's it.  Didn't spill any coffee, either.  What a talent! :-)

Got some more good news yesterday.  I contacted the specialty flight surgeons that my company has a contract with and was assured that I'll be up, up, and away within about three months.  I'll have to jump through a few small hoops for the next five years, but it should be no sweat.  I didn't contact them sooner, because I was concentrating on the here and now rather than the future.  The future is now in terms of my medical certificate, so that's what I'm doing.  Amazing.

Keep Your Mach Up,

Bill

 

Posted 3/24/2007 8:16 AM (GMT -8)
Wow Bill - such a great post! Congrats on being done your treatments! You have come such a very long way in what in the scheme of things is a very short time (only seems long at the time).

Our best to you now and always! We will continue to keep you close to mind and heart and prayers.

;o) Linda & Bob
Posted 3/24/2007 9:39 AM (GMT -8)
Congratulations on being done, Bill.

Your posts are so helpful and informative and positive. New folks will benefit greatly from your experience, strength and hope. And good news on getting back in the air soon. That will indeed be a great day for you.

Your strength, attitude and humor have helped me and all of us so much...

Jim
Posted 3/25/2007 11:33 AM (GMT -8)
Jetguy -- I've just gotten my diagnosis (3+3=6, T1c, one positive out of 10)(age 60, also still married to same girl after 38 years) and just joined the forum yesterday. Over the past couple of days, I've read back over many threads relating to both surgery and IMRT/IGRT. Still trying to decide what's best for me. Sounds like things have gone really well for you. Congratulations on completing your treatment. If you have a moment, can you tell me why you chose radiation therapy rather than surgery? I'm really torn. Like so many, I'm trying to decide between "I want the darn thing out and know that the cancer's gone" and "I can't deal with the possibility of incontinence and impotence." Thanks. Again, congrats!
Posted 3/25/2007 2:42 PM (GMT -8)

Dear Puget,

I just sent my thread Why I Chose Radiation to the top for you.  I also have a thread that describes what happens during IGRT called Radiation - a journey.  pcdave has a good one about proton beam and JustJulie has a good one about brachytherapy (seeds). Since most of the guys have had surgery there is no end of info about that. Lots of info here and even more support.  I'm glad that you found us. 

My urologist told me that the cure rate for me was the same for surgery and IGRT.  I have never had a surgery and it's my goal in life to never have a sawbones cut on my tender body.  I think that most of us choose what we fear the least.  That's what I did.

The radiation has been good to me so far.  Minimal side effects.  I'l have my first meeting with my urologist Monday, April 2 and will report back at that time. 

Good Luck to You, Puget -

Bill

P.S.  You can expect many emotional ups and downs.  It's normal for this situation.

Posted 3/25/2007 4:06 PM (GMT -8)
Bill/jetguy, thanks for sending the thread.  I'm leaning toward IGRT.  Do they irradiate the entire prostate, even if you only have one lobe involved on biopsy?  My brother had IGRT, but his entire prostate was positive for growth, so i thought maybe that's why his entire gland was targeted.  Sorry if my questions seem a little lame.  I'm new at this with a BIG learning curve to tackle before I make up my mind.  Thanks again.
Posted 3/26/2007 4:48 AM (GMT -8)
Bill, I'm so happy for you that your treatments are over. I'll do a little dance for you! as you said, now you can get on with living! and Pete - yeah, middle age is challenging, but we'll take that any day over the alternative, right?! Have you heard the old saying "getting old is not for sissies." God bless, kat
Posted 4/2/2007 6:27 AM (GMT -8)
Hi Bill,   I just read your posting about the special events that took place after your last treatment.   No wonder you were tired…. Breakfast, Lunch, Lies… I’d be tired too!!!           Much deserved “special” specials for you!!!   Don’t wait on that massage.   If they have the Swedish Hot Rocks…. Go for it.   You want a nice soothing massage.   The deep tissue massage can come later.   Pamper yourself.   We do every other Thursday….. it’s part of our wellness program.     Bill ~ your postings are wonderful.   Just imagine newbies coming on board and finding them……   it truly is a powerful gift that you said from day one that you would be sharing your experience and you stayed true to it!!!!     Take the time you need….. take all the naps you need too to help in your healing/recovery process.   Baby William would love to have a nap with you!  I'm glad to see that you focused on "YOU"... and once you have some "healing/recover" time you can move forward to getting back up into that beautiful sky!!!      Looking forward to hearing about your Monday appointment.    Keeping you tucked in close...with happy hearts filled with love for the two of you and baby William.... from Lee & Buddy    
Posted 4/2/2007 7:14 PM (GMT -8)
jetguy, how did your appointment to today? I hope and trust you continue to do well, with no adverse side effects. Hang in there.
Posted 4/4/2007 5:08 PM (GMT -8)
puget

i will soon finish my proton radiation treatments.  they have to radiate the entire prostate. the biopsy is only a sampling of the potential cancer in the prostate. quite often when PC patients have surgery, they find that the pathology of the removed prostate shows a higher Gleason score and stage of cancer. if they didn't radiate the entire prostate, they could miss some of the cancer.  moreover, i don't believe that any form of radiation could target just an area of the prostate. the prostate at its normal size of about 24cc is about the size of a walnut.  also, when they radiate the prostate, they also radiate some of the area surrounding the prostate (i.e., the margins) to hopefully target any cancer that may have escaped the prostate. 

dave

 

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