Your leaking history is similar to mine until week 12. Don't get discouraged. Keep kegeling. The Pelvic Floor Muscles will develop into a bundle of muscles -like your bicep- and display a muscle tone of recruitment patterns that will communicate with the unconsciously controlled (smooth muscle) valve on the bladder to eventually keep you continent - even when squatting down and lifting..... It will take time and work.
While wet, use a barrier cream (e.g., petroleum jelly) daily and a fungicide cream (e.g., generic Tinactin) weekly.
I would use a vacuum pump daily to keep your largest nerve bundles looking in the right direction for the promised land. Hold your wife close and often. You will conquer E.D. but this will likely take even more time.