Many years ago, I worked in Special Ed for 4 years.
Now, for the last 18 years, I have taught elementary age children every
Sunday in Church.
(I've only missed a handfull of Sundays in 18 years - half of them for my prostatectomy...)
Specifically I teach the 4th & 5th grade.
The advantage of this age group (or emotional and developmental level) when explaining sensitive issues is that the simplest truth is the easiest
They will ask questions. Short honest answers
are best - and actually expected.
The challenge here is your "great unknown" of how the post-surgery biopsy will turn out.
Compounding this unknown and its emotional roller-coaster that all of us here have ridden or are currently riding, ...
... compounding this emotional state is your recent hysterectomy and its impact on your emotions.I mention these emotions because this is what you must try to keep out of your discussion with your child on this topic.
Your child undoubtedly will read the stress and worry in your voice, posture, eyes, etc.
Many special ed. kids are more perceptive in these channels than mainstream children.
So, my experience suggests to perhaps just say for now (with all honesty) that Daddy is sick and visiting the hospital to try to make him better.
You are not sure what it is exactly but will tell him later when you find out.
By the time you have the post-surgery biopsy explained to you,
you will be comparative veterans of the emotional swings that come with this territory (both radical prostatectomy and hysterectomy) and
have a better picture of what you are facing and can lay it out in simple and least possible emotional terms
Children at this level that are given this type of information will of course want to know if Daddy will be all right? More importantly they want to feel secure
- for example that they will not be left alone or in put in unfamiliar circumstances when anything suggested frightens them.
A brief example of why I personally teach at the elementary level and not teenagers might help encourage you some in your situation:
When the kids read in the script
ures; "....and he knew her...." ,
they ask "Teacher, what does that mean?"
Without flinching, I don't bat an eye or smile too big and say:
"They spent the night together and 9 months later they had a baby."
They say "Oh." or "Gross" or some such thing and the subject is changed and never brought up again....
Looking on the bright side of your situation, the ability to give simple answers is much easier than say, explaining the male reproductive system to two teenage daughters.
Be honest. Keep it simple. Wait for a time of comparative calm and more knowledge.
2 Years of PSA between 4 and 5.5 + Biopsy 23DEC06
Only 5 percent cancer in one of 8 samples. + Gleeson 3+3=6
Radical Prostatectomy 16FEB07 at age 54.
1+" tumor - touching inside edge of gland. + Confined. :)
Pad Free @ 14 weeks. Six Month PSA <.003 :)
At 6 months, ED treated with Pump Exercises & 50mg Viagra Daily
Texas Hill Country FRESH Produce Department Manager
Have you had your 5 colors today?