As the others mentioned, I'm sorry for your loss. There's no way I can understand or feel what your going through.
As far as PC, you can see by my signature line that I'm very similar to you, even age wise. Even though my first post surgical PSA was .01, because of my positive margins, my doctors were talking about adjuvant RT right away. Recently revealed studies have shown that adjuvant RT within the first year for positive margin patients, will decrease the probability of reoccurance. I wasn't excited about hormones, which my docs perscribed two months prior to radiation and want to continue for a total of two years. I had virtually no side effects with the 32 radiation sessions, and so far, just a few with the hormones. However, my surgeon mentioned that the RT has probably wiped out the nerves he spared. Looking at both sides, I would vote for an increased probability of longer life than the nerves he spared.
Hang in there...you have lots of friends here, and a strong support group at home.