Well, based on a suggestion from the moderator, I thought I would introduce myself to this site since I'm a "newbee".
I have been diagnosed with UC for about 15 years now. Been trying to deal with it ever since. I am currently on Colazol and Azathioprine.
My doctor has been stating that I am currently in "remission". I guess his opinion in what "remission" is and what I believe it is it totaly different!
I am currently not experiencing any type of bleeding, but I seem to have all the other symptoms, but not as severe as when I am in a full blown flare-up. Still the same, I'm still finding the emotional part very hard to deal with.
Emotionally, I feel as though I am a wreck...even though I do not protray it to others. I am the type of person who does not want my problems to be others. I have had this *&%$#@! condition for so long, it has worn me out emotionally. Day after day, week after week, month after month and year after year...the same thing. I average a flare up once per year and lasts for several weeks until the different medication that my doc prescribes (pregnizone) kicks in.
I still have sudden urgencies to head to the bathroom and you just do not know when it is going to happen. This happens about an average of three times a day. This is what is driving me crazy. My wife and I are active people and it is very difficult for me to go and do certian things because of my condition. I now actually have full scale anxiey and panic attacks if I feel trapped for some reason (traveling in a car, on a plane, in line somewhere, etc. etc.). Yes...I try to take as much precautions as possible (Amodeum, toilet paper on my possession and even wear Depends from time to time!). But, having this condition to naw at you for so long, it has broken me down.
I honestly can say that I try everything in my power not to have this "thing" affect my wife by tyring my best not to show my emotions when I am under one of these attacks (my UC or anxiety attacks). I cannot have my condition affect others and their lives! I feel bad enough having this condition, but to have my condition affect others and especially the ones I love would tare me apart.
I know that the doctor can try to treat the condition, but how does one treat the emotional aspects of it as well? How can you not feel panicked when you are in a place that you may not be able to get out of in time? To hear someone say..."just don't think about it" dives me crazy! It's not like you can turn this emotional trauma like a switch! It's gone beyond that.
For me...life is not as enjoyable as it used to be. Not enjoyable at all and I'm not even in a flare up. I applaud the people who can triumph emotionally over this condition! It's just for me....it has been so long and the doc says that "this is the best you are ever going to get". That's real comforting. I have looked locally for groups for UC and even at our local hospitals that help people emotionally with medical conditions..but nothing.
I better stop right here. This thing is getting to be a novel! LOL!!!! Sorry people for the ones who acutally read through all of this rambling.