Invited to a Birthday Dinner for a 12 year old

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Date Joined Jul 2005
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   Posted 1/24/2008 12:05 PM (GMT -6)   
I was invited to a birthday dinner for a friends 12 year old. The menu the little girl wants is for her mom to make baked ziti. My question is, I am currently in a flare, and I don't think that red sauce will go great with my stomach. Too acid.  How do I go to this party and not eat, without making a scene that I can't eat that. I don't want everyone there to know and feel sorry for me.   Does anyone have any suggestions how I can go about this? I can't even let the mother know ahead of time, because i don't want any special treatment of her cooking me something different. Any suggestions?
Diagnosed July 2005 with Pancolitis
Asacol 4 tabs 3 times daily
Diosmin(for leg and vein support)

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Date Joined Jan 2007
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   Posted 1/24/2008 12:10 PM (GMT -6)   
Is it a sit down dinner or buffet? If it's a buffet just say tomatoes doen't agree with you and spend the time mingling, refilling drinks for others, and talking while they are eating. Not spending too much time with one person may offset the why aren't you eating question. If it's sit down I would probably tell the hostess and bring a small bowl of plain pasta for myself, and use the tomato excuse. You could always dress as a butler/maid and say that part of your gift to the little girl is to be at her beck and call and that requires you to not eat with everyone else.
Kelly, 29

Left sided UC diagnosed 1/98 age 19, Pan colitis diagnosed 1/07
Currently on 4x3 Asacol, 15 mg pred, down to 10 mg 1/11/08!
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Taken off of Imuran temporarily 1/11/08-back on 1/16/08
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   Posted 1/24/2008 12:44 PM (GMT -6)   
I've been in many situations where I couldn't eat what the hostess was serving. Some of the parties were where they knew of my Uc and others not. For the ones that not, I would just say that I'm on a specialized diet because certain foods bother my stomach so I would either eat before I went there or bring my own.
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Old Hat
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   Posted 1/24/2008 12:46 PM (GMT -6)   
Party food for kids tends to be gooey-- bad for UC flares! My advice: eat something soothing to (hopefully) quiet your intestines before you go. Then tell the hostess after arrival that you're allergic (to whatever), but that you don't expect any fuss. In the thick of activity there should be a quick accommodation that will get you off the hook re ziti-- just expect that others seated at table (if a sit-down dinner) may look at your plate & urge the unwanted food on you. I think if you stay calm, cheerful, & positive the other celebrants will, too, & they'll overlook your food choices. You could also bring a camera along & offer to take pix during the meal-- I've used that to get out of office party eating/drinking. / Old Hat (nearly 30 yrs with left-sided UC ... [etc.])

Regular Member

Date Joined Jan 2008
Total Posts : 154
   Posted 1/24/2008 12:49 PM (GMT -6)   
just say you're allergic to tomatoes
Diagnosed in spring 2005 at age 28
Currently on 12 asacol pills a day + Entocort

Veteran Member

Date Joined May 2005
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   Posted 1/24/2008 12:50 PM (GMT -6)   
My mom gets a reaction to acidic foods and adds a teaspoon or so of sugar to any tomato based sauce and that fixed that problem. Probably not something you want to try at an event outside the home but if you are ever stuck where it is the only meal it might make it a little easier on you.

As to this party - why dont you just ask the mom to save some ziti w/o the sauce for you. Then just add butter or olive oil or eat it plain. It really wouldn't be that much trouble to set some of it aside.

Or, just bring your own meal. I wouldn't worry about being a bother and don't be shy. Our society is used to accommodating lots of fad diets let alone someone with a medical condition!!!
26 Year old married female.  Diagnosed w/ CD 3 years ago, IBS for over 10 years before that, which was probably the CD.  Currently on Pentasa 4 pills/4x day, hysociamine prn, nexium, and ortho evra.  Good times!!!

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2007
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   Posted 1/24/2008 12:58 PM (GMT -6)   
or you can say you have killer heartburn, which red sauces (for me anyway) make it worse........everyone understands heartburn!

or bring something that you can eat too, just show up with it and put it out on the table and eat that.

the taking pictures thing sounds good too.
Beth, 32
Major Flare Sept/Oct 07 ~ working on remission almost there
UC dx'd March 2000 (30 cenitmeters as of 2005-proctosigmoiditis)
Azathioprine 200mg 1xday nightly; Calcium and Vit D 500mg 3xday, Multi Vit, Folic Acid 400mg 2xday, Probiotics.
Minimal Change Disease (Kidney Disorder) Diagnosed Sept 2007
Prednisone 60/40mg alt days 1xday, Simvastatin 20mg 1xday, Diovan 160mg 2xday. Potassium 600mg 2xday, Fosomax 70mg 1xweek. MCD may be from hypersensitivty to 5ASA drugs.

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Date Joined Jul 2005
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   Posted 1/24/2008 1:08 PM (GMT -6)   
Thanks to everyone for the ideas, Keep them coming
Diagnosed July 2005 with Pancolitis
Asacol 4 tabs 3 times daily
Diosmin(for leg and vein support)

Veteran Member

Date Joined Dec 2005
Total Posts : 3238
   Posted 1/24/2008 1:19 PM (GMT -6)   
This happens to me all the time. Tomato products of any kind kill my IBS. I swear for about 6 months my mil was trying to kill me (pasta, pizza, chili). I have become a master of the shift and move. Just poke at it w/ your fork, eat the other stuff (lots of bread for me!) and then plead fullness from eating a big lunch!
Tabitha (Tab)

100mg Azathioprine, 2 Fibercon, Colazal-9 a day, Acidopholis Pearls, Nexium
Co-Moderator UC Forum

Veteran Member

Date Joined Apr 2006
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   Posted 1/24/2008 2:11 PM (GMT -6)   
Is dinner at the start of the party? You could always go after if it was.

It's usually not a big issue to bring your own. Just make sure that if it's something really good you bring enough to share!

Plead that you're saving room for cake!
Pan-colitis and GERD diagnosed May 2003
Asacol 12 per day,  Azathioprine 75mg, Aciphex, Effexor XR, Forvia and a Probiotic
Osteopenia (hip and spine) from prednisone use.  Started Azathioprine because I was steroid dependent.
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potty girl
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Date Joined Dec 2006
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   Posted 1/24/2008 4:48 PM (GMT -6)   
I find that its not a big deal to take your own, there is a lot of people on all kinds of diets now days that some parties I have been to there is always someone bringing there own. my son has never been able to have any type of dairy so I have been carring food around for 23 years. most people dont think much about it.

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Veteran Member

Date Joined Apr 2006
Total Posts : 733
   Posted 1/24/2008 5:02 PM (GMT -6)   
I was gonna say what tjf said... eat at home first, then when you go get a little pasta and lots of bread, eat the bread, when no one is looking throw the pasta out.  Be careful with the soda too, at these parties they are always giving me soda I can't drink and that is annoying, I just get my own water now.  Try not to be too anxious about it all, it is a good start to get out and give this a try, if you don't feel well and need to leave, it's ok.  I hope you have a nice time and that your guts behave!

Diagnosed with Left-sided Ulcerative Colitis 1995 at 15
Tried: Prednisone, Rowasa & Hydrocortisone Enemas, Proctofoam, Sulfasalazine, Asacol, Probiotics, Fish Oil, Canasa, Enotcort, Colazol, Proctocort, Anamantle, etc...
Diagnosed with Ulcerative Proctitis with almost rectovaginal fistula in 2004, put on Remicade, August 2007:Increased Remicade dosage-700mg every 6 weeks,diagnosed with Psoriatic Arthritis & Fibromyalgia Current meds: Remicade 700mgs every 6 wks (had reaction, will start Humira Jan 29) Clorazepate, Proctofoam HC, Glucosamine 500, Vitamin B, Lomotil as needed, Darvocet, Tylenol pm

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