Funny family 'solutions' to UC

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ddneilson
Regular Member


Date Joined Mar 2008
Total Posts : 21
   Posted 4/22/2008 10:52 PM (GMT -6)   
Since this disease sucks so much, it's always nice to introduce a bit of levity whenever possible. So, if you have a funny/entertaining "solution" to your disease that was suggested by a family member, friend, or total stranger who just doesn't "get it" please share! I'll start.

My grandfather is 80+ years old and from the "old country" so he tends to attribute odd things as "fixes" to various conditions; the logic's pretty strained most of the time but, we love him anyways. :-P For example, one of his solutions to _all_ stomach issues is to never have hot and cold food at the same time -- eat one temperature, wait a few minutes, then have the other. We're pretty sure he doesn't feel pain/discomfort like other people; he underwent cataract surgery with zero anasthetic (he found out he's immune to the stuff).

Anyways, so, I'm chatting with him on the phone last summer and he's asking how I'm feeling -- 'not great, but I've been much worse' is my usual reply. Then, he tells me of a remedy from the "old country;" he says to go down the liquor store, buy some plum brandy, and have a shot every single morning. He then immediately follows that up with "we use moonshine but brandy is close enough." I got a good laugh out of that one afterwards. :-)

edit: Misremembered. It was plum brandy not bourbon.
Universal Colitis since 09/2003
Current Meds:
Asacol (800mg 3x daily),
VSL #3 (4 packet/day),
Calcium Supplement,
Multivitamin

Post Edited (ddneilson) : 4/22/2008 10:03:57 PM (GMT-6)


Red_34
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Date Joined Apr 2004
Total Posts : 23551
   Posted 4/23/2008 6:15 AM (GMT -6)   
I don't have any funny family "remedies" but it can be sort of funny what some people come up with. But who know?! Maybe the plum brandy can work! If not, at least it will make you "happier" :)
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tjf
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Date Joined Dec 2005
Total Posts : 3238
   Posted 4/23/2008 7:08 AM (GMT -6)   
The first time my hubby ever met my uncle (God rest him) he served my husband moonshine. Okay that is totally unrelated from your topic but it made me remember and laugh!!
Tabitha (Tab)

100mg Azathioprine, 2 Fibercon, Colazal-9 a day, Acidopholis Pearls, Nexium

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lemonhead
Veteran Member


Date Joined Dec 2007
Total Posts : 1028
   Posted 4/23/2008 7:34 AM (GMT -6)   
In have 2. My father-in-law swore that his mother had UC and she had a martini every night, and she had no symptoms of her UC after she started that regimin. My boss told me that (and he is a doctor) if you eat Skyline Chili everyday, it will cure anything.....anything. I don't know if you all are aware of Skyline chili, but it tastes great going in, burns like fire coming out. Funny thing is, even knowing this, I tried it anyway.....anything to get rid of this UC....didn't work.
diagnosed with left-sided UC in 1997. (45cm)
Currently on 10mg Prednisone
12 caps of colazal    9 caps Colazal
2 rowasa enemas nightly
35, female


bookworm21
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2008
Total Posts : 1766
   Posted 4/23/2008 11:19 AM (GMT -6)   
I have a non-UC one. I've always been short and skinny, but have always had long hair. My parents thought that all the nutrients I was eating was just going to my hair instead of the rest of my body. So my parents made me cut my hair short in junior high (I absolutely hated it). This did nothing--my hair grew back in less than a year and I remained (and still am) short and skinny. They made me cut off my hair for no reason--I was extremely angry!!!
This isn't necessarily funny, but my parents are also making me drink coconut water because they think it'll be good for my digestive system. Is this true?
Female, Age 19, Dx w/ UC August 2007
Seasonal allergies
9 Asacol/day, 1000 mg Canasa (caused side effects)
Digestive Advantage (Crohn's & Colitis), 2 pills/day
Calcium chews
 


78SilvAnniv
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2008
Total Posts : 289
   Posted 4/23/2008 1:03 PM (GMT -6)   
Not a solution, but it is a cute joke...

A woman was having trouble with her keyboard and called computer support to see if they could send someone over to fix it. On the phone, the technician asked a few questions to narrow down the scope of the keyboard situation. The lady told him some of the keys were sticking. He asked her which ones. She replied; A, E, I and occassionally O and U. The technician told her he knew exactly what was wrong with her keyboard: It had irritable vowel disease.


I have the ability of single-minded determination and accurate project focu....Hey, look, a cat!
 
UC is pretty darn crappy, but if you can't laugh at yourself, you'll cry. 
I'd much rather laugh.


pb4
Elite Member


Date Joined Feb 2004
Total Posts : 20577
   Posted 4/23/2008 1:47 PM (GMT -6)   
ComedyDork said...
I have a non-UC one. I've always been short and skinny, but have always had long hair. My parents thought that all the nutrients I was eating was just going to my hair instead of the rest of my body. So my parents made me cut my hair short in junior high (I absolutely hated it). This did nothing--my hair grew back in less than a year and I remained (and still am) short and skinny. They made me cut off my hair for no reason--I was extremely angry!!!
This isn't necessarily funny, but my parents are also making me drink coconut water because they think it'll be good for my digestive system. Is this true?

Coconut juice/water is excellent for your health so keep up with it.
 
:)
My bum is broken....there's a big crack down the middle of it!  LOL  :)


summerstorm
Veteran Member


Date Joined Aug 2006
Total Posts : 6571
   Posted 4/23/2008 8:53 PM (GMT -6)   
my grandma thinks that rockin rye (whiskey) will cure anything. My aunt (her sister) thinks Dr. Pepper is a cure all, she actually thinks that dr pepper will cure most ailments, and their other sister thinks you should wave your hands above your head for few minutes. THis makes me sound like i come from a family of loonies! but they are all 78 or older. Their mother had collitis and she used to eat ice to cure it. what she was really doing, obviously, is just resting her colon by not eating for a while.
but as for the brandy, and such, alot of older people use that for curealls. You can use it for a fever reducer, or to stop coughs, it actually does work to stop coughs. For teething, lots of things.

pb4
Elite Member


Date Joined Feb 2004
Total Posts : 20577
   Posted 4/23/2008 9:14 PM (GMT -6)   
Well even on the news when they mention people who are centenarians (people who live to be a hundred or more) many of them swear by smoking and booze...just the other day they had a guy on who was turnig 110 and he still smokes 14 cigs a day and has a shot of rye every night and has been doing so for most of his life.

:)
My bum is broken....there's a big crack down the middle of it!  LOL  :)


julee70
Regular Member


Date Joined Oct 2007
Total Posts : 486
   Posted 4/23/2008 9:58 PM (GMT -6)   
This made me think of the movie My Big Fat Greek Wedding -- the father believed Windex could cure everything. Maybe I should spray some on my stomach. lol
-------
UC for the last ten years
Current Meds: 6MP since 2006, Cortifoam
Past Meds: You name it; I've tried it. (Asacol, Colazol, Pentasa, DiPentum, Rowasa, Canasa, Cortenema, sulfasalazine)
5ASA drugs don't work for me. Canasa seems to make me worse.
Alternative treatments I have had success with: Acupuncture, Hypnotherapy


78SilvAnniv
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2008
Total Posts : 289
   Posted 4/24/2008 9:37 AM (GMT -6)   
julee70 said...
This made me think of the movie My Big Fat Greek Wedding -- the father believed Windex could cure everything. Maybe I should spray some on my stomach. lol

Ah-ha-ha-ha-ha-hah!  I was thinking of MBFGW as I was re-reading this thread!
 
[Greek accent] You should spray some windex on it. [/Greek accent]
 
Now for something windex related...I actually HAVE tried it and I doubt very much that it works!  o_0  Two Remicade appointments ago, I was stuck in the car-park garage traffic and had to "go", so I situated myself with a garbage bag and towels and 'went' while trying to find a parking space.  NOT one of my finer moments, I'll tell you!  When I finally found a parking spot and was able to clean up, all I had were some towels and a spray bottle of windex.  I sprayed the windex on the towel, intending to only clean my skin and leave the more 'sensitive areas' windex-free, but I guess I wasn't as precise as I thought I would be and boy-oh-boy did it STING!
I have the ability of single-minded determination and accurate project focu....Hey, look, a cat!
 
UC is pretty darn crappy, but if you can't laugh at yourself, you'll cry. 
I'd much rather laugh.


kb5
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2007
Total Posts : 1015
   Posted 4/24/2008 9:54 AM (GMT -6)   
My husband threatens to spray my belly with windex all the time!!! Great thread!
Kelly, 30

Left sided UC diagnosed 1/98 age 19, Pan colitis diagnosed 1/07
Currently on 4x3 Asacol, 5mg pred, 150mg Imuran
Prontonix once daily for acid reflux, zofran twice daily for nausea, darvocet for pain
Remicade started 3/1/08...just had 3rd infusion

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