Hi Susie. Tough when things don't work out, and it's tough to keep things going when they're not working out.
Your husband probably is depressed, but he has a responsibility to work things out for himself...and that includes counselling and the most important...accepting responsibility for himself and his part in the marriage.
If you do go to Montana....you have to as well make the decision to either not move back or move back for good. The saying "absence makes the heart grow fonder" has a lot of truth.
Make some decisions to get on with your life, for if you always have an "out" (moving to Montana), as well as your husband always having an "out" (you forgiving him and moving back), you'll never get to the next step.
You tried....he tried....old habits die hard.
Make sure you have your support systems intact.
If you do intend to give it a last shot before you do leave, offer your husband the options of getting his act together by a certain date or you will be leaving (and filing for separation?). Antidepressants might be in order for him as well as therapy/counselling (but alone without you).
Maybe financial counselling for him as well since his mood is dependent on his business successes.
You two should consider to be on Dr. Phil...joking but with a possible suggestion.
I hope it works out....and that's a subjective wish meaning in the best possible result, be it together or separate.
You really have to look after yourself....some people just aren't good for each other even though they do love each other.
*Heather*Status: mini flare Dec 28... tapered to every 4th night
~diagnosed January 1989 UC (proctosigmoiditis)
~5ASA: Asacol (6 daily) + Salofalk enemas (increase for flares tapered to maintenance)
~Bentylol (dicyclomine) 20mg as needed
~Probiotic 3(Natural Factors Protec) bedtime + 1 (Primadophilus Reuteri) occasionally
~multi-digestive enzymes as needed ....zymactive 3 - 5x daily
~Ranitidine,Pariet (reflux) Effexor XR 75mg; Pulmicort/Airomir (asthma)
~URSO for PSC (or PBC) 500mg X 2 daily (LFTs back to NORMAL!!)
My doc's logic.. "TREAT (FROM)BOTH ENDS" worth it !!!