I definitely understand how you're feeling. I've been with my boyfriend for three years, and when we met, I was in the worst flare of my life. One day, before we even started dating, I found an "Understanding Ulcerative Colitis" book in his room. At first, I was really embarrassed and then completely smitten because NO ONE, not even my own family, has ever tried to really learn about
it that much.
He went to appointments with me, talked to me on the phone while I was doing my preps (I never allowed him to come over because I was too embarrassed, this was when I was still living with my parents), he's come to every colonoscopy or sigmoidoscopy and snuggled with me afterwards. It was just such a wonderful feeling to have someone so understanding about
Now, three years later, he's made the occasional unsupportive comment and it really does hurt my feelings. "I hate that I have to spend so much time in doctor's offices and hospitals and I'm not even sick" "I don't think UC is funny, don't make jokes about
it" "It's like I'm dating an old lady, all you ever do is sleep and feel sick, and it's not fun" etc etc...
You have to understand that while we're the ones in all the pain, they have to sit by knowing that there's very little that they can do, and it must be frustrating for them. I know he cares about
me and it hurts him that I feel sick, but sometimes I just want to say well I'm SORRY to inconveniance you, but you're not the one who has to live with this!! But in reality, they kind of do too. They have to watch us run back and forth to the bathroom, decline meals, fall asleep early, miss social gatherings, pay a ton of money for health related items/medicine, lose our sex drive, lose our happiness... It really does take a bit of a toll on them too.
I don't think you're being too sensitive at all; there have been many times when I've cried over the fact that I think I'm being a burden on everyone and it's even worse when they actually TELL you that. But it doesn't mean he doesn't care or love you or support you. Have you talked to him about
Female, 22, Ulcerative colitis (pancolitis) since 1999; GERD; gastritis; oste
openia in hip & lumbar region of the spine from long term prednisone use. Current Meds:
10mg Lexapro (for depression/social anxiety)
Digestive Advantage: Crohn's and Colitis formula (2 pills per day, started 5/14/08)
4800mg Asacol (Four 400mg tablets, three times a day)