One of the things we (I) did prior to Bratcat's surgery was get in touch with a patient of the surgeon's who had gone through it. In fact, we did this with both surgeons we looked into. It made it a bit easier to ask questions to people who had gone through the process.
It is definitely important, unless done as an emergency, to be as mentally prepared for surgery as possible. I honestly think that is a strong component to healing. Bratcat has been home for about 24 hours so far from step 1. We are beginning to have questions about recovery that, although the home health care nurse seemed to answer, we will probably ask on j-pouch.org. Might as well ask those that have gone through it! But even Bratcat knows no one answer will fit everyone. She knows to ask questions, listen to answers, and try to see what fits her.
Sorry you have to even be thinking about this next step. Noone wants to get to it. We never expected to be at the surgery point ever, let alone less than 2 years after being diagnosed. For now, if nothing else, you can contact a surgeon (or two) and look into all the possibilities. Our thoughts are with you always.