Are any of you in counseling?

Hi, I was just wondering if any of you are in counseling to help deal with the disease and life in gereral and has it helped?  I went off of my cymbalta and went to talk to my family doc about it today.  He thinks I will benefit from counseling.  The recent death of my mom has been hard along with everyday life, but I think it is hard on me emotionally just coming to terms with having this disease, even though I don't have it that bad.  Does counseling help you at all?  It just seems weird that all you are doing is telling your problems, do they just listen?  Do they make you feel better?  Any input will be ineresting to me, Thanks, Bellski

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Lori (Bellski)-age 43 from Illinois

I haven't been to counseling but I just wanted to extend my condolances on the loss of your mother.

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I did right at the end of my first flare. We had just found out my dad was a closet alcoholic and the whole ordeal was stressful. I went to a couple sessions and it felt amazing to get things of my chest. I could complain to the counselor about how I was feeling and she would help me find a way to deal with it all- in a positive way (I'm definitely a negative thinker...)
If you do decide to do it I hope it helps you! :)

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Sam
Diagnosed March 2005
Remission since January/April 2006 (incident with mono)
3200mg Asacol, 25mg Amitriptlyine, Ortho Tri-cyclen lo, Imodium when I need it
"If you don't like something, change it. If you can't change it, change your attitude"
Maya Angelou

Thanks Sherry and Sam. I do think I am going to go to counseling. Hospice has some grief counseling for the family that is free but I will also get some christian counseling. It gets expensive as insurance covers only 70% but I figure, I should do it now before January because we have our deductible met. I know it shouldn't matter, I just feel guilty spending too much money. I'm going to go into it with a positive attitude. I do think I need it. Thanks and I'll keep you posted.

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Lori (Bellski)-age 43 from Illinois

Hi..do the counselling. I had therapy for many many years....just because of my own/growing up family issues. Having health problems was a part of the process.

There are many things in which we have no control and many in which we do.....it's an incredible introspective journey to learn the tools of how to deal. It's not all pleasant, however.....but it has an amazing subjective power when we have someone to listen and to guide us through the process of finding "ourselves".

quincy

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Thanks quincy. I hope the counselor I see is a good one. She is recommended by my family doctor. I will make an appt tomorrow for the end of July as she is out of town now. I appreciate your sharing, it helps me. Bellski

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Lori (Bellski)-age 43 from Illinois

Thanks for asking this question, as I've been wondering this myself. I've often thought I could benefit from counseling after being diagnosed. I had been dealing with the stress of leaving my job to stay home to raise to my son (the change in lifestyle was surprisingly stressful), and now the added stress of UC definitely makes me feel like I could use a little help. I've not been on any anti-depressents but have wondered about those also... in fact, I may ask be asking my doc about them at my next appt. on Thursday... we'll see...

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Female, 30.   Chicago 'burbs.

I know it is hard Kiss. My husband suddenly found himself at home after a 22 year career and bam, it does hit you. Stress is a crazy thing. I know several people that benefit from medication, I just didn't want to be on it. I hope counseling can help me through some of the things I've been going through.

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Lori (Bellski)-age 43 from Illinois

Hi there, Sorry about your Mom, that's really sad.  I just finished a course of therapy, it was so helpful, I can't tell you the difference it has made in my life ... UC is a lot to deal with, counselling really, really helps.  I would recommend it to anyone, its is so worth it.  And after you're done, you'll wonder why you put it off for so long. 

I say a therapist for about a year. It was the best thing I ever did. It took me awhile to find the right person that i felt comfortable talking to. I was mainly there because I had a hard time dealing with UC (this was about a year after my first big big (3yr) flare. Seeing her helped me to deal not only with the issues surrounding my disease but with family, priorities, and finding what I wanted out of life.

She encouraged my to move out of my parents house, get a job I was scared to go for which lead to me meeting my husband. I don't think my life would be as wonderful as it is now if i had never gone to therapy.

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Kelly, 30

Left sided UC diagnosed 1/98 age 19, Pan colitis diagnosed 1/07
Currently on 4x3 Asacol, no more pred after two years!!!! Off imuran as remicade is working!
Prontonix once daily for acid reflux, zofran 8mg every six hours for nausea
Remicade started 3/1/08...just had 4th infusion

I need to go, I need help sorting everything out and it's nice to have someone there just for you. I went when my Mom was very sick (mental and physical) and it really helped me out, it is a good place to vent. I only went like 8 times but was all I needed for that at the time and I know I can always go back.

Sorry for the loss of your Mother.

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Beth, 32 ~ hoping to taper pred successfully, wish me luck!

Thanks Kelly and Boyfrom Oz, Sounds like therapy can be very helpful. I have to say, I'm excited about it now. I am the type who does tell my problems to those close to me, but I'm guessing this will be different because this counselor is proffesionally trained to guide me. Thanks again, Bellski

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Lori (Bellski)-age 43 from Illinois

Wow, Thanks too Beth, You know my mom was so sick for so many years and I have to say that mental illness came with the physical. I can't tell you how hard that is to deal with. Just thinking about it makes me want to cry. Well, it sounds like you know what it is like. Well, Thanks all for being there for me. I kind of like to think you are all my little counselors too. It is so nice. Have a wonderful day. I'm off to school to prepare my new classroom! (O: I am so excited. Take Care!

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Lori (Bellski)-age 43 from Illinois

Good luck with the new school year! And I can't believe I forgot to say this in my original reply, but I'm so very sorry to hear about your mother. I can't imagine how difficult that must have been.

I can relate to your husband - leaving a job seems like something a person would enjoy, but its a huge adjustment to make. And on another note, I can't believe that my doctor has never recommended any kind of counseling or medication for depression. I mean, its NEVER even come up. Clearly, he has only studied the physical part of the disease, and I often question even THAT.

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Female, 30.   Chicago 'burbs.

I'm throwing my butt into counseling starting tomorrow. I am so excited! I have gone in the past and it does wonders. Just getting a different perspective on things really helps. And it's much easier to talk to someone that isn't emotionally involved with you or has nothing to gain (well, other than a check). My husband has been great, but he is just too close to everything...plus sometimes he is part of the stress.

My sister died of a stroke last year and I just found out my mom has lung cancer. My dad has blocked arteries and they are talking bypass surgery. I may end up being in a care taker role for my parents. UC and work just add to that stress!

I never went to grief counseling and in hindsight, I should have. But I am taking the opportunity now. I'm hoping to learn some better methods of dealing with stress and also how to better handle the twists and turns that life keeps throwing at me. I'm looking for some direction for elder care as well. I just want to work thru this feeling of being overwhelmed all the time.

I think you will really get a lot out of counseling.

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Age: 48
location: Seattle, Wa
Diagnosed with UC in June 2006
Medications: Asacol 2 pills 3 x/day, Canasa supps
Supplements: vitamins, probiotics
No. of colonoscopies: 1
Originally diagnosed with moderate UC, pancolitis

I am doing the counceling as well. I was coping w/the disease however, my brother died suddenly last May of a heart attack and that pretty much did me in. I started having MAJOR panic attacks and went to the ER many times. I've had all my stress tests and my heart is fine, but I still freak out when I feel UC pain in my joints and left side stuff...thinking its my heart. Counseling and meds have helped. I'm currently on 5mg Lexapro and .5 clonazepam (anxiety) to help me sleep. I'd like to get off of all these meds but my Dr says its not a good time (many stressors in my life right now). I am worried that my UC is spreading and that I may not be able to work full time as I do now. My counselor has helped me work through dealing with this possibility and encouraging me to look at my challenges differently.

Thanks guys. It sounds like a no-brainer. We all have hard times and it's O.K. to take care of our mental health too. I am not sure my husband quite understands this part and the money factor always seems to be an issue. I just feel if I can help myself become stronger and better we will all benefit. Thanks again for listening and good luck to you all too.

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Lori (Bellski)-age 43 from Illinois

Well, just tell him that it's an early christmas gift. It is SO WORTH the $$!

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Age: 48
location: Seattle, Wa
Diagnosed with UC in June 2006
Medications: Asacol 2 pills 3 x/day, Canasa supps
Supplements: vitamins, probiotics
No. of colonoscopies: 1
Originally diagnosed with moderate UC, pancolitis

Great idea!

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Lori (Bellski)-age 43 from Illinois

Lori, I'm so sorry to read about the loss of your mom. I hope that your memories can help comfort you through this time. I lost my dad in Feb. '07. He was sick for over 20 years and just kept getting worse. It comforts me to know that he's not suffering anymore.

Counseling has helped me at various points throughout my life, like making the decision to leave an abusive husband. Now, I just finished my master's degree in counseling! I can tell you that there are various counseling theories out there and different ones help different people. Most couselors are "eclectic" meaning that they use different techniques depending on what they think the client needs. Counselors are trained not to give advice, but to help you find your own answers. If the first counselor doesn't seem to be helping after a couple of visits, then consider finding a different one. When you click with a counselor it's really a great thing and very beneficial. Also, some counselors will consider financial strain into their billing or have sliding fee scales. You may be able to work out an agreement for your portion of the fee. It's worth asking about, anyway.

As the posts here reflect, counseling's not only for "crazy" people, but for people dealing with normal things that happen in life, too, like sickness and loss. It shows what a strong person you are to realize that counseling can help you and actually taking the steps to do it! Good for you!

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Tressa 35 (F) in WNY

Thanks Tressa, I am glad you were helped by counseling and now help others. I find it interesting that you said they don't usually give advice. I really want advice. I wwant guidance. I suppose I can mention that to my counselor. I mean, If I have to find my own answers, it makes me feel like I don't even need counseling. I am glad you mentioned that though. It is good to know. That way I am better prepared. Also, thanks for the advice on asking about the financial part. We have the money, he just doesn't like spending it. lol Congrats on your Masters! Take Care, Bellski

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Lori (Bellski)-age 43 from Illinois

No problem, Lori. Tell your counselor that you'd like him or her to be "directive". That means that you want them to help guide you.

I have been to counseling 3 times.

1. It was about 25 years ago and I was feeling sorta lost. The counselor kept asking me "how do you feel about that" whenever I brought up a subject. I only went to her once.
2. 15 years ago. I got dumped by a boyfriend and those family apron strings were way too tight. The counselor provided me with some direction on how to stretch my wings, let go of the old bf and gain more confidence in myself.
3. 6 years ago - marital counseling. The counselor was GREAT at helping us communicate. The best advise he gave to us is to ask each other what we need from each other. He really provided a lot of great advise and direction!

I'm going to counseling again because of the stress of UC, the stresses of work and the stress related to my sister's death and my parent's illnesses (and possibility of becoming their caretaker). I'm in a new chapter in my life and I just need some help finding the resources I need to deal with it. I need help defining an action plan instead of just sitting around being overwhelmed all the time.

So....there are a TON of counselors out there. Some folks need the "how do you feel about that" ones and some need the "give you advice and direction" ones. If you don't find a counselor that works with you well, find another one! You owe it to yourself!

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Age: 48
location: Seattle, Wa
Diagnosed with UC in June 2006
Medications: Asacol 2 pills 3 x/day, Canasa supps
Supplements: vitamins, probiotics
No. of colonoscopies: 1
Originally diagnosed with moderate UC, pancolitis