From the partner perspective, Mark's interest really decreased throughout the years with UC. He was either just sick feeling, or worried always that he'd have to get up, etc..You know the drill. Anyways, what we learned throughout this time was the true meaning of INTIMACY versus sex. What I started to learn was that we needed to reestablish ways to connect physically, and I found that a lot of the time Mark just hurt, his body hurt, he felt gross, etc.., so we started introducing ways to make his body feel pleasure that didn't require him to feel the stress of sex performance. Plus, for me this helped because I also lost my interest b/c he did seem "Sick" a lot. So, we started doing things like having him relax in the bath, then maybe I could rub his arms, shoulders, legs, etc...then if it struck the moment things may have lead one thing to another - but for us, we started turning off the tv., rubbing feet, maybe it would lead elsewhere. We also, especially on my end would remind him that this back rub or whatever does not have mean sex, so that it would take that pressure off. Once we did that we really started to reconnect and it saved us as a couple. And we also introduced more avenues to share with each other more openly times of self satisfaction, so that if it wasn't together at least we weren't totally excluding each other from our sexuality - again it was more about developing our intimacy versus actual sex. I'm trying to talk honestly and yet still be age appropriate for diverse readers. I did actually do a post on the blog called Sex and Intimacy http://ucstory.wordpress.com/2008/07/03/sex-and-intimacy/ because it was such a long learning process for us to learn how to be an intimate couple realistic with his health issues.