It's awesome your father shared his wishes for a New Orleans jazz band to lead him at his own funeral..and that you're honouring them.
I agree that it's for the celebration of his life, there's no doubt he will be missed and that the day will be difficult and sad. Take in the sharing from others of how they knew and remember him. Hopefully, others will overlook the aspects of the arrangements that they might not like.
I hope the support of your family and friends helps you through this painful time.
*Heather* Status..Asacol 6 (3 twice daily); enemas every 4th night
~diagnosed January 1989 UC (proctosigmoiditis)
~Bentylol (dicyclomine) 20mg as needed
~Probiotic 4(Natural Factors Protec) bedtime + Primadophilus Reuteri Pearls occasionally
~multi-digestive enzymes as needed
~Ranitidine,Pariet (reflux); Effexor XR 75mg(depression); Pulmicort/Airomir (asthma)
~URSO for PSC (or PBC) 500mg X 2 daily (LFTs back to NORMAL!!)
My doc's logic.. "TREAT (FROM)BOTH ENDS" worth it !!!