What a lousy day and its only 9:30am!

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iluvsunflowers15
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2006
Total Posts : 395
   Posted 1/6/2009 9:41 AM (GMT -6)   
I am so annoyed right now. My UC is flaring today due to eating all of the wrong foods during the two weeks I was off from work. I also ate instant oatmeal with blueberries this morning. My uc has been killing me all morning. I've been running to the bathroom all morning. Already have had 5 bm's so far. I am a teacher and thank god I don't teach the first two periods.
 
I am also very stressed out with my boyfriend and grandfather. My grandfather just came home from a short stay at a rehab. He was in the hospital for a week or so and then was at the rehab. He came home on the 30th. He's very dependent on all of us (I live with my parents and brother). It irks me to no end when he yells my name. He is deaf and so is the rest of my family. I am hard of hearing as well. So, I am the only obvious one that can hear him.
 
In addition, my boyfriend of 14 months and I were doing very well until this past week. I will admit that I accidentally took out my frustrations on him by throwing things around the room, crying, yelling, and pushing him away when he only wanted to help. I've apologized repeatingly. He kept stating that I have anger management issues. Anyway, I've been making every effort during my busy work day and evening to text or call him. He calls me once a day and rarely responds to my text messages. During his voice mail messages, he tells me thank you for the texts. That's it. Am I asking for too much? I am probably overthinking things. We have a great relationship going. I am just not happy with the way things have been in the past week. Could it be my family life? I don't know....
 
Thanks for listening to me vent.
 
Heather
Colazal 750 mg 3x3 daily
6-MP 50 mg (2) daily
Miralax-when needed
Rowasa-when needed
Been diagnosed with UC for 5 years


princesa
Veteran Member


Date Joined Aug 2007
Total Posts : 2204
   Posted 1/6/2009 10:05 AM (GMT -6)   
Stress and poor diet choices definitely have the power to instigate a flare or make one worse. These are two of the reasons doctors give for people tending to flare around the holidays.
Diagnosed with ulcerative colitis spring 1999.
 
Maintenance dose sulfasalazine.
Probiotics, l-glutamine and fish oil caps. George's aloe vera juice. Oregano oil antibiotic, antiviral, antifungal. Long-term remission with only minor blips.
 
 


quincy
Elite Member


Date Joined May 2003
Total Posts : 30986
   Posted 1/6/2009 3:50 PM (GMT -6)   
You could sit down with your family and tell them that they're putting too much responsibility to you. Set up a light system connected to your grandfather's room to alert others that he's in need...and suggest that you have to take turns because it's too stressful for you to do all the duties.

Is your grandfather able to understand what's going on? meaning is his mind logical? Explain to him to not call your name unless it's urgent because you can't be running to him at every whim.

The other thing is to maybe get someone in to help with your grandfather a few hours a day.

Most of us have anger management issues, and most of them are fuelled by frustration...remember your boyfriend shuts down with his father, and probably doesn't know what to do with your situation that requires so much of you.

Don't lower yourself to your boyfriend with constant texting, considering his only response is thank you....I know it sounds worse than I'm meaning it...but let him be for a while. He probably doesn't know what to do/say to help you.

You need to talk with your parents and family to work out a plan for your grandfather....that will help lower your stress levels. Maybe do shifts at home so that everyone is contributing to his needs and also their own needs.

quincy
*Heather* Status..Asacol  (3 twice daily); flaring since Dec 22, tapered every 2nd nite (Jan 3)
~diagnosed January 1989 UC (proctosigmoiditis)
~Bentylol (dicyclomine) 20mg as needed
~vitamins/minerals/supplements 
~Probiotics....(Natural Factors Protec, Primadophilus Reuteri Pearls, Natural Factors Ultimate).... @ bedtime
~various digestive enzymes as needed
~Ranitidine (reflux);  Effexor XR 75mg(depression);  Pulmicort/Airomir (asthma)
~URSO for PSC (or PBC) 500mg X 2 daily (LFTs back to NORMAL!!)
My doc's logic.. "TREAT (FROM)BOTH ENDS"  worth it !!!
 


iluvsunflowers15
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2006
Total Posts : 395
   Posted 1/6/2009 5:44 PM (GMT -6)   
Hi quincy,

Thank you for your comments. :) My parents are the sole caretakers of my grandfather. I spoke to my gi nurses and they told me to not even touch my grandfather or do anything physical in terms of caring for him. My parents are the ones that care for him physically. The only time that I care for my grandfather is when he calls me. It is annoying, but what can I really do? He does not understand the difference between what is urgent and what is not anymore. He has dementia and is disoriented most of the time.

My parents are well aware of how I am handing all of this emotionally and physically. I speak to them on a regular basis about it. My father stated earlier today in fact that I've been eating the wrong foods and resorting back to my old habits (not so good habits of course!).

I agree with you about the texting. I didn't realize that texting my bf constantly was my way of getting attention, etc. I spoke to him earlier abou t how I felt that he does not respond at all to them except for phone calls. I did explain to him that I am as busy as he is and that there is no reason why he cannot respond to my texts when he can. The whole situation just made me feel bad. We did clear the air after I spoke to him nicely and said that it would mean a lot to me if he does respond to my texts whether its an hour, 5 hours, or even 24 hours then not do anything at all.

I am going to relax tonight and do some scrapbooking sketches. I need to stay in my room after dinner and just relax! :-D

Thanks for your insights.

Heather
Colazal 750 mg 3x3 daily
6-MP 50 mg (2) daily
Miralax-when needed
Rowasa-when needed
Been diagnosed with UC for 5 years


Kiss520
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jun 2008
Total Posts : 742
   Posted 1/6/2009 6:47 PM (GMT -6)   

I don't think you're asking for too much.  To keep your anger in check, try to remind yourself that this disease can make you too focused on how every single day is going.  Even when things are going great, if I have one bad day I really let it get to me.  So now I try to tell myself that one bad day among several good ones is just a blip and I can handle it.  When you have a rough day, try to convince yourself to just make it through today and see what tomorrow brings. 

I'm sorry to hear that your home life is so difficult right now.  I like Quincy's suggestion about the light system - that could really take the pressure off of you.  I hope you find a solution soon, since the stress will do nothing but aggravate your condition.  Good luck!!


Katie, 30.   Chicago 'burbs.
DX:  Pancolitis as of 9/08 (Proctitis as of 1/08)
Current Treament:  Spinach/sunflower & Low-residue diet.
Previous Treatment:  Canasa suppositories, Cortifoam, Prednisone, Colazal, Symex DuoTabs, Rowasa, Bentyl, Cortenema, Asacol, Iron, Zoloft, Acidophilus.
Status:  Near total remission
 
 
 
 


quincy
Elite Member


Date Joined May 2003
Total Posts : 30986
   Posted 1/7/2009 1:40 AM (GMT -6)   
Hi Heather...I didn't realise the extent of your grandfather's situation and that your parents were his caregivers. It must be very difficult for them to see him in such decline.

Talking about it and asking for others' perspective on something always helps.

Hope you enjoyed your evening.

Take care.
q
*Heather* Status..Asacol  (3 twice daily); flaring since Dec 22, tapered every 2nd nite (Jan 3)
~diagnosed January 1989 UC (proctosigmoiditis)
~Bentylol (dicyclomine) 20mg as needed
~vitamins/minerals/supplements 
~Probiotics....(Natural Factors Protec, Primadophilus Reuteri Pearls, Natural Factors Ultimate).... @ bedtime
~various digestive enzymes as needed
~Ranitidine (reflux);  Effexor XR 75mg(depression);  Pulmicort/Airomir (asthma)
~URSO for PSC (or PBC) 500mg X 2 daily (LFTs back to NORMAL!!)
My doc's logic.. "TREAT (FROM)BOTH ENDS"  worth it !!!
 

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