Strange Story - Anxiety - Your Suggestion Needed

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Regular Member

Date Joined Mar 2008
Total Posts : 166
   Posted 2/3/2009 8:11 PM (GMT -6)   
Right now my UC is not flaring.
On Colozal 3/3 times a day and Canasa supp every other day as needed and probiotics.
My story is strange.
It happens everyday morning.
I'm staying in a single bed , single bath apartment
My wife wakes up in the morning to get ready for work.
when she wakes up suddently i also will wake up and go to restroom before she goes even I'm not having any sensation.
I will do this just to make sure i don't bother her.
When she enters the restroom, all of a sudden my brain starts with negative thoughts (like the sensation of going to restroom) and anxiety builds up, which creates urgency.
This ends up to bug my wife and knock the restroom until she comes out.
This starange thing only happens when she enters the restroom. when the restroom is free, i dont feel like going and no urgency at all.
I will take my time until i really feel like going...
My best days would be weekends, where i wake up around 9 or 10am. But in week days i woke up in the morning around 6.30am and this crapy things start happening in the morning.
Sometimes this happens when i return from work. Then i look around for restrooms and if i go there nothing comes out.I know its all due to Anxiety and keep thinking about my Bowels.
Not able to control these feelings/thoughts and keep them out of my brain.

It may be very starange for all u guys even this is happening durinf flare free days.
What to do?

Do you guys have any tips for this that u follow?

I tried my level best to stop this by watching TV, talking my self, but still not going away.

Please advise

Regular Member

Date Joined Jan 2009
Total Posts : 135
   Posted 2/3/2009 8:20 PM (GMT -6)   
You might wanna ask your doc about anti-anxiety meds
21 yr/old Uni student. Vancouver, BC
Imuran 150 mgs/day

Prednisone 7.5 mgs/day
Diagnosed UC Sept. 2007
Cal-Mag, CoQ10, L-glutamine and Iron supps. Also now trying probiotics Bio-K (acidophilus)

Elite Member

Date Joined Feb 2004
Total Posts : 20577
   Posted 2/3/2009 9:56 PM (GMT -6)   
This is definitely a clear cut case of anxiety, could you ask your wife to leave the door unlocked? Maybe just knowing you could freely go in there if you have the urge will be enough to help with the anxiety of it all, but of course you could certainly look into anxiety meds, meditiation and/or both together.

My hubby and I "go" freely infront of each other if it just happens to be that he's in the bathroom the same time as I need to go (at least when we had only 2 bathrooms, now we have 3 and just 3 of us at home since oldest daughter has moved out) but for us, even though the thought of pooping infront of anyone is really gross to some people, it's never bothered him or me when either of us have done it in the past.

My bum is broken....there's a big crack down the middle of it! LOL :)

Veteran Member

Date Joined Dec 2008
Total Posts : 510
   Posted 2/3/2009 10:11 PM (GMT -6)   
I have almost same situation. But with a live in girl friend and not a wife. Single bath duplex with a basement cold room. the girl friend understands and we work it out. but during the holidays with all that family around. at one time I had 18 people here for dinner with one bath and me with UC. I took a camping porta potty ( one of the ones thats just a toilet seat and ya hang a bag from it to poop in ) ANd put it in the basement cold storage room. Figured In an emergency I could slip off and go there to poop if someone was in the bathroom and an emergency hit. No one would know. Just the knowledge that I had that option kept me from having that panic urgency. Even now when I'm pretty much in remission and can "hold it" again, the knowledge that that is an emergency option gives me immense peace of mind.
38 yr old male, NE Ohio, diagnosed Aug 2008, but been with symptom since Nov 2007
30 mg pred, 9 balsalazide, rowesa nightly, 2 gemfibrozil, 1 norvasc, 1 metoprotol, 1 allopurinol, 2 probiotic, 2 aloe vera tabs
Following gluten free diet as well as spinach/sunflower regime
**down to 25 mg of pred 12/25/08 **down to 20mg of pred 1/7/09**down to 17.5 mg 1/22/09
**down to 15 mg of pred 2/3/08
MED CHANGE: 1/13/09-- 4 Lialda, 2 Pamine Forte, 1 Florajen3 probiotic, 2 Aloe Vera tabs, Rowesa every other night, 20 mg of Pred, Lomotil as needed, 2 gemfibrozil, 1 norvasc, 1 metoprotol, 1 allopurinol

New Member

Date Joined Jan 2009
Total Posts : 8
   Posted 2/3/2009 10:42 PM (GMT -6)   
I have the same anxiety problem about going to the restroom. When my fiance's alarm goes off, and it's before I have to wake up - I get terrible anxiety that he will be using the one toilet we have. I have to hurry in there (most days) and use it before he does. We do go freely in front of eachother, but it gets annoying to him because he wants to go #1 before getting in the shower.

Anti-anixeity meds do help a lot. I would recomend one highly to you happyliving.
I am actually not on one right now, but I am thinking I need to start up again. I have been doing much better lately, due to the Prednisone, but once I am off the Pred. I will definately need the anxiety pills! =)
29 years old, female
Ulcerative Colitis -diagnosed in 2005.
Current Status: In a flare, but getting better.
Just taking it one day at a time.
Meds: Prednizone 40 mg-tapering down, Colazal, 6MP, and Remicade. I also take Iron and Folic Acid supplements.

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 723
   Posted 2/3/2009 11:30 PM (GMT -6)   
I don't know if I clearly understand the chain of events you describe, but I think that anxiety like this is a two way street so to speak. It can be like a feedback loop - the way I imagine it is: in the AM my UC is certainly more cranky than the rest of the day, and I'm more prone to urgency. I imagine my gut is sending out negative inflammatory signals because everything has been sitting in it all night and it's not happy. Then my brain tries to make sense of this 'negative' signal, and will try in it's own way to make sense out of it - by imagining negative things. a negative attunement, so to speak.

The negative attunement (like thoughts) feeds back into the gut enhancing the situation.

If this is sounds right, you might try catching yourself at a time you're having the negative thoughts and consciously make the effort to change your attunement. Think of something relaxing, Pray, meditate, think of something that holds a great deal of meaning for you. It may make it easier to deal with (it did for me) to realize that some of the irrational thoughts probably are motivated by the negative signals going on in the gut and not from some Freudian psychodrama.  I don't know that this would help with the need to go in the AM but it might help make it less anxious.

Of course if the UC or the negative thoughts are severe then you should get professional advice.

Take Care

Diagnosed with Ulcerative Colitis 6/2006 at age 26 after sudden E.R. visit
~Pancolitis (Mild to Moderate)
 ~I had Mono in 2000
On Colazal 3x3/day; Folic Acid 1mg; Calcium/Magnesium/Zinc combo
(Generic Balsalazide not as effective for me)
In remission about 2-3 months after E.R. but not back to normal!
I hate Ulcerative Colitis and can't wait till we eradicate it

Veteran Member

Date Joined Aug 2008
Total Posts : 5975
   Posted 2/4/2009 4:07 PM (GMT -6)   
     Best thing to do is purchase a portable toilet.  You can buy them at medical supply stores, about $120 but well worth it.  I have three of them !!  One we had from my mom who lived with us but passed away in 96 (good thing I save and two I purchased.  Keep one in the basement, one in family room and one right here in computer room.  Great for one bathroom homes.
62 yr old granny. South Jersey
Diagnosed with ulcerative proctitis in 1998 in hospital
Hospitalized (2nd time) in May 2008
Update 11/03/08...finally in remission!!  Hope I don't jinx myself.  Off the prednisone since 11/01/ see if I can stay off for longer than two weeks.  Other meds: 6MP (75 mgm), colazal (6 per day), Benicar and Toprol (high blood pressure meds), Probiotic (2 per day), fish oil capsule and multi-vitamin and calcium with vitamin D.

Regular Member

Date Joined Mar 2008
Total Posts : 166
   Posted 2/4/2009 8:42 PM (GMT -6)   
Hi All,

Problem that is bothering me is this happens even though I'm flare free......
Will medicines helps......I want to be away from them.........
Is there anybody else who is practicing some other techniques other than medicines?

Thanks for all your responses

Veteran Member

Date Joined May 2005
Total Posts : 4219
   Posted 2/4/2009 10:38 PM (GMT -6)   
You could try CBT which is cognitive behavioral therapy. In short you basically slowly expose yourself to what you are afraid of, learning to cope each step of the way, until you are not afraid anymore. It is best to do this with an actual therapist so you learn coping skills (like deep breathing, etc). Since this is your wife and not a new girlfriend you should feel safe with her and not like you would just die if you pooped your pants trying.

I would start with asking your g/f to get up first and just go to the bathroom for 2 minutes or so (like if she was to go to pee). Then to get out and let you use it. Once you start realizing you can wait two minutes, build it up to 5. Maybe have her brush her teeth and put on make up or something. No matter how strong the urge, wait it out - just those 2 minutes. Just those five. Do that every day for a week or so. Get to the point where you can fall back asleep.

Next have her work on taking really quick showers while you wait it out.

Also, you could look into getting her a vibrating alarm clock that goes under her pillow. That way you might sleep through her getting up and showering anyway. I also like the idea of having something (like a lined trash can) as an emergency back up.

I personally, don't like the idea of just going in front of each other. In a truly dire emergency (like the side of the road) fine. But UC and Crohns is ugly messy and stinky. I wouldn't want my husband hearing and smelling that come out of me and I certainly wouldn't want anyone doing that while I was in the shower.

But, it happens to the best of us. I had to kick my dad out of the shower when I was visiting recently because I just couldn't wait anymore. Also, I have a friend w/ a one bath apt. and everytime her roommates would get in the shower my heart would race and I would get all sweaty.
27 Year old married female law student (last year!!). Diagnosed w/ CD 4 years ago, IBS for over 10 years before that, which was probably the CD. I am sort of lactose intollerant too but can handle anything cultured and do well w/ lactose pills and lactaid. For crohns I am currently on Pentasa 4 pills/4x day and hysociamine prn. I also have bad acid reflux and have been on PPI's since age 13. I have been through prilosec, prevacid, and nexium. Currently I am on Protonix in the morning and Zantac at night. I also take a birth control pill to allow some fun in my life.

Veteran Member

Date Joined Mar 2008
Total Posts : 2855
   Posted 2/5/2009 11:20 PM (GMT -6)   
I was thinking the same thing, that there is probably some kind of therapy to get over this.

That said, anxiety can definitely cause me to feel urgency...then nothing happens, once I can relax.
I have the good fortune to have 5 bathrooms in my house, and there are only two of us, so no problem there! But anxiety will hit me like that when I'm in the car or flying. I've gotten pretty good at talking to myself through it.
49 year old female attorney, diagnosed UC/pancolitis 1985, no surgery but much suffering.
Asacol/5ASA 6x400 mg maintenance for 20+ years; use prednisone & Rowasa for flares. 
August 2008 sought care of naturopathic doctor. Food sensitivity test showed wheat/gluten, other intolerances; started diet without gluten, soy, dairy, tomato etc. Replete$$ probiotic powder, then Forte, now a stronger one (50 billion). Doing much better, but still having some bad days. 

Veteran Member

Date Joined Feb 2005
Total Posts : 2103
   Posted 2/5/2009 11:33 PM (GMT -6)   
I feel the same way when I'm in a public place and I don't know where the restrooms are. I freak out and end up having to go. Its almost like my brain is so used to having to know where ALL restrooms are at any given time and make sure no one is occupying them. It wasn't a huge problem for me but I've noticed that since starting effexor for general anxiety problems, I don't worry about stuff like that much anymore.
20 year old college student diagnosed with ulcerative colitis at 16
Remission since January/April 2006
400mg Asacol 2x, 10mg Elavil, 75mg Effexor XR for GAD

"If you don't like something change it. If you can't change it, change your attitude"
Maya Angelou

Regular Member

Date Joined Jan 2008
Total Posts : 362
   Posted 2/6/2009 12:12 AM (GMT -6)   
The minute I walk out my front door, this happens to me. Only since last October when I had an accident in my car while out(alone thank goodness).
Now I am fine until I put my shoes on. Then my coat, and it starts.
I never travel the freeway, but main roads with all the fasts food restaurants, and gas stations so I can pull in if needed
Unlike some of you, I would die if I ever had an accident in front of my husband, and never would I go, nor would I want to be in while he goes to the bathroom.
It's the only thing I keep for my privacy, and he feels the same.
But I hate driving to unknown areas, as I don't know where the bathrooms are.
This life is hell at times.

UC Dude
Regular Member

Date Joined Aug 2005
Total Posts : 438
   Posted 2/6/2009 6:27 AM (GMT -6)   
Therapy is my thought. UC makes you nuts if you aren't already. :) Therapy can be a big help without adding other drugs into the mix.

Regular Member

Date Joined Apr 2008
Total Posts : 460
   Posted 2/6/2009 9:15 AM (GMT -6)   
What your experiencing happens to me too, it's the worst feeling. Thankfully we have 3 bathrooms so I don't have to worry about it at home. I get the same feelings when I have to leave my house too, especially if I'm going somewhere with someone. My family has a summer home with one bathroom. Imagine the feeling of hearing 6-10 people enter the bathroom throughout the course of the morning. It's torcher and that's why I haven't been there in 3 years!

I saw a therapist and she did have me do CBT. It helped a little bit but sometimes the urgency and disease are still there and it just doesn't work. I choose to take a small dose of Xanax a few times a week when I'm having bad days and am nervous about leaving the house. It's not the ideal situation (I wish I didn't need the anti-anxiety medicine) but it really helps me.
Female, Age 38
Diagnosed w/c.diff 7/02 when pregnant w/1st and only child during 2nd trimester(wasn't on antibiotics)
C.diff flare within weeks of delivering baby 1/03, Diagnosed with UC 2/03
Current Meds:
75mg 6-MP
Ferrex Forte
Acidophillus, Sacchromyces Boulardii, Oil of Oregano

Soccer Coach
New Member

Date Joined Mar 2008
Total Posts : 1
   Posted 2/6/2009 6:41 PM (GMT -6)   

I have the same problem.  There is only one bathroom where i work for 17 people.  I will not have the urge to go until I see someone go into the bathroom and lock the door.  I panic and need to get in there in less than a minute or I have an accident.  However if I work on a Saturday and I am the only one at work, I can work all day and use the bathroom maybe once.  I have been on the Carbohydrate Specific Diet since April of 08 and have been doing much better.  These frequent panic episodes are my only struggles.  When I am relaxed at home I use the bathroom 3-4 times a day.  At work or on the road I am using every bathroom I see just in case and many times do not pass anything.

I have spoke to my doctor about this but he does not understand.  It is comforting to know that I am not alone in experiencing this problem.

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