Maybe I do need some kind of therapy or somebody to talk to as I am having a hard time getting my head around this disease. The last month I have been feeling really depressed and thought my family would be better off without me, it's like it has complete control over every aspect of my life and I have just given up.
Don't think like that. I too have had thoughts about
suicide, but after having two family members commit suicide, I would never do it. I now know what it feels like to be on the other side. So instead of thinking about
suicide, I now think about
how I can support and help my family. I also try to think about
positives and not deal on negatives.
I joined a positive thinking psychology group earlier this year. It was great. Each week we had a different assignment. We all felt happier from doing the assignments. These may help you feel more positive. Here are some of ones we did:
1. Three Good Things
At the end of each day, write down three things that went well that day and why you thought they happened.
2. Have a Good Day
Keep track of your activities each day, and at the end of the day, rate each activity and the day as a whole. At the end of the week, determine which activities are most meaningful and pleasurable. Try to reduce the time spent on activities that are not meaningful and pleasurable and increase the time spent on those that are meaningful and pleasurable.
Once per day, take your time and enjoy something that you typically rush through. Briefly write down your experience in doing so.
4. Gratitude Visit
Think of a person to whom you feel very grateful. Write a letter to this person, telling them why you are grateful and then invite this person somewhere and read him/her the letter.
5. Active/Constructive Responding
Respond both positively and enthusiastically to good news from another person. Do this at least once per day to a person whom you feel close to.
6. Write Your Own Biography
Write a brief biography discussing what you would like to be most remembered for in life. Think about
ways in which you can begin moving toward these goals in your day-to-day life and then carry them out.
7. Positive Service
Volunteer and write down your experience.