feeling guilty when calling out of work

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turtlepower
Regular Member


Date Joined Oct 2011
Total Posts : 234
   Posted 1/8/2014 6:08 AM (GMT -7)   
I've missed the past 3 days of work because I haven't been feeling great. It isn't UC related, thankfully. I think I feel guilty because I probably could have went in, I just couldn't muster up the courage to do so. I, however,don't feel guilty when calling out when it is UC related. Anybody else feel guilty when missing work?

sherbear46
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Date Joined Jun 2011
Total Posts : 3316
   Posted 1/8/2014 6:30 AM (GMT -7)   
I only work part time and I haven't missed work yet. I drag myself to work no matter how rotten I feel unless I am vomiting. Hard to answer the phone with your head in the trash can or talk to clients face to face.

With that said, if you sick your sick. If you feel like you can't do your job then you shouldn't be at work. When I was a manager and someone was sick and should have stayed home, I would just say go home anyway.
Co-Moderator UC and Breast Cancer forums
Sheri-40 years old

Diagnosed UC/IBS April 2009-Left sided Jan 2013 Endo showed gastritis and Colonoscopy showed only 2 cm of rectal inflammation
Diagnosed in Jan 2013 with Chronic Uticartia

Meds-2 Lialda, Aciphex, Allegra, Singulair, Xyzal, Vitamin D3, Hydroxyzine (as needed), probiotics, Canasa 3 x week

arizonahiker
Veteran Member


Date Joined Oct 2009
Total Posts : 772
   Posted 1/8/2014 6:52 AM (GMT -7)   
Well I think 3 days is a lot especially if it is connected to a weekend. I think if I was going to miss a 3rd day I'd get a note from my doctor and email it in. Then I wouldn't feel guilty.
Male - 56 - Ulcerative Colitis on/off since 1980. Slight flare.
Asacol HD 3X per day
Mesalamine enemas (yippee)
Mesalamine suppositories (yay)
I try to eat preservative-free diet with occasional vegetables and fruits

jujub
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Mar 2003
Total Posts : 10405
   Posted 1/8/2014 7:12 AM (GMT -7)   
I was also one who would drag myself in when I felt terrible. I worked all the way through my 5+ year flare. However, my rules for our department were that if anyone had a fever, productive cough or diarrhea, they would be asked to go home if they showed up. (Not counting anyone like me who had non-infectious diarrhea.)

The plus side was that when I had to be off for six weeks for surgery, I was in full pay status the whole time because I had accumulated leave. Still, when I retired three years later, I had about three weeks accumulated and was paid for them.

It wasn't really so much that I felt guilty as that I was afraid to face my desk if I was out for more than a half day.
Thyroid forum moderator

Ulcerative colitis since 2001 in 7th year of remission with Remicade.
Inflammatory osteoarthritis; osteonecrosis from steroids
Grave's disease treated with radioactive iodine and now on Levothyroxine.
Type II diabetes induced by steroids.
Eczema, darn it!

angee23
Regular Member


Date Joined Nov 2013
Total Posts : 32
   Posted 1/8/2014 7:37 AM (GMT -7)   
I'm with sherbear46...The only time I don't go in is when I'm vomitting. Without going into details I inform my co-works that the porcelin god and I will be best friends for the day.
35 year old female
Left side colitis
Diagnosed 2011
Uceris 9mg
Asacol HD 800mg (2 tablets 3x daily)
Vitamin D

Indycat23
Veteran Member


Date Joined Apr 2011
Total Posts : 661
   Posted 1/8/2014 10:40 AM (GMT -7)   
I used to feel guilty for not coming in to work earlier in my career but I started to realize that I'm not very useful if I am not functioning at a decent level. It's better to sit out for a couple days and come back ready to work then muddle through the day barely able to work.
Pancolitis-- Diagnosed 3/2011
Current Meds-Colazal, Ultimate Flora Probiotic , Canasa/Rowasa,
Simponi, Vit D & Fish Oil Failed-Remi, Imuran & Humira.

2014 Plan---Vedolizumab or Surgery..time to get on with life.

deltaforce
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jun 2010
Total Posts : 2242
   Posted 1/8/2014 11:50 AM (GMT -7)   
@sherbear46,
I like managers like you. I have seen the kind, who tell their folks to take the medicine and do the job. When I was working on my PhD, I used to work 7 days a week, almost 10 hours weekdays and at least 5 hours on the weekends, that would vary depending on work. When sick, I would avoid going to lab and my boss would make sure to give me a call that I am really sick. It used to be so annoying that I put so much efforts in, agreed its my PhD, still the guy calls in when I am really sick and unable to even answer the phone..

To OP question,
No, I don't feel bad at all. If I go to work, I give my 100%, I don't even answer any personal phone calls, unless its emergency. If I am not going to give my 100% for any reason, I would prefer to stay home.
Dx 03/2007, left sided UC.
Sulfasalazine 1.5gm, Imuran, 50mg, Vit. B12, 1mg, Multivitamin, 1 tablet, Fish oil 2400mg , Vit D 2000 IU, Benebiotics 2caps, Folic acid 1mg. Canasa

Verapamil 320mg for migraine,
Nabumetone 750mg as an abortive, so far so good with GI side effects.
iHerb code BMV549
$5/$10 off on $20/$40 first purchase

Old Hat
Veteran Member


Date Joined Feb 2007
Total Posts : 5135
   Posted 1/9/2014 2:53 PM (GMT -7)   
Whether you should feel guilty or not depends on what your overall job attendance/performance is like. If you have a limited amount of allowed sick leave per yr, have you exceeded it? Does your supervisor seem satisfied with your day-to-day accomplishments? What was your most recent official performance evaluation like? (If your organization requires periodic staff review.) For many yrs I worked where staff were required to submit a doctor's note after 3 consecutive days absence on sick leave, and the supervisors acted very resentful/suspicious if anyone called in sick on Friday or Monday unless they had a sterling attendance record. / Old Hat (33 yrs with left-sided UC; presently in remission taking brandname Colazal)

sherbear46
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Jun 2011
Total Posts : 3316
   Posted 1/9/2014 3:34 PM (GMT -7)   
@Angee-that is what I tell co-workers now...most know my situation and if I'm having a bad morning I say "I may need to dash off and you know why". Funny though, I have never needed to at my current job.

@Delta-I was a Manager of a boarding kennel for dogs. There were only like 8 of us who worked there. I worked one day with full on brochitis, fever, feeling like I was going to die. And the other girl didn't show up just because. I cleaned the whole darn kennel that day. I think the owner finally sent me home after she saw how effed up I looked. That day I should have stayed home but I had thought I would get things squared away for an hour or so and then leave. Little did I know. But over the 8 years I managed the place, I sent people home for being sick, drunk, strung out on god knows what and for just being an idiot who couldn't do the job on a good day. LOL
Co-Moderator UC and Breast Cancer forums
Sheri-40 years old

Diagnosed UC/IBS April 2009-Left sided Jan 2013 Endo showed gastritis and Colonoscopy showed only 2 cm of rectal inflammation
Diagnosed in Jan 2013 with Chronic Uticartia

Meds-2 Lialda, Aciphex, Allegra, Singulair, Xyzal, Vitamin D3, Hydroxyzine (as needed), probiotics, Canasa 3 x week

embersglow1
Veteran Member


Date Joined Nov 2013
Total Posts : 1612
   Posted 1/9/2014 9:14 PM (GMT -7)   
My boss does a good job of making me feel guilty about calling in.
We are a staff of 3 so if we go one man down, then it can suck.
But also, its not a HUGE deal for our line of work.

I feel guilty in the fact that I have depression and not being able to "accomplish" anything for the day make me very upset... or I feel guilty because I hate "letting down the team."

But with my UC... I literally went into work, vomited, was paler than white and could barely keep my eyes open and my boss told me to "work through it."

PFFFFT. After that... yeah... guilt is not really there.
Katie - 27
Diagnosed UC July 11th, 2013
Currently Flaring.

Current medications:
balsalazide 3 750mg caps × 3x a day.
Prednisone 20mg (tapering)
Zoloft 200mg.

Past meds: Lialda 4.8g - nope. Prednisone - 20mg, 40mg, 60mg, 30mg - nope.

Allergic to Sulfas.

Dizzy2002
Regular Member


Date Joined Mar 2011
Total Posts : 118
   Posted 1/12/2014 5:21 AM (GMT -7)   
I used to feel guilty, I used to go to work when I was really ill. But after my second stay in hospital, I didn't even get sent flowers or a card while I was in hospital, or any visitors from work. Then I came back to work, and my boss was really mean about me being off, and the fact that my doctor had signed me off for reduced hours while I recovered. Since then I just thought that if no-one else cares about my health, that I should put my health first.
Diagnosed 2002. Hospital 2002 for 2 weeks. Hospital 2010 for 2 weeks. Been off steroids for about 2 years. Currently in remission (fingers crossed!) taking 4800mg Asacol daily, also iron and anti-sickness pills.

jujub
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Mar 2003
Total Posts : 10405
   Posted 1/12/2014 6:48 AM (GMT -7)   
I think you've hit on something there. I suspect that, in many cases, our devotion to our jobs is directly related to the amount of support (or maybe just lack of abuse) we feel from our employer and co-workers.

If they have no concern or loyalty for us, I see little reason we should have for them.
Thyroid forum moderator

Ulcerative colitis since 2001 in 7th year of remission with Remicade.
Inflammatory osteoarthritis; osteonecrosis from steroids
Grave's disease treated with radioactive iodine and now on Levothyroxine.
Type II diabetes induced by steroids.
Eczema, darn it!

arizonahiker
Veteran Member


Date Joined Oct 2009
Total Posts : 772
   Posted 1/12/2014 7:32 AM (GMT -7)   
"If they have no concern or loyalty for us, I see little reason we should have for them." Judy you just explained the meaning of Leadership 101. LOL
Male - 56 - Ulcerative Colitis on/off since 1980. Slight flare.
Asacol HD 3X per day
Mesalamine enemas (yippee)
Mesalamine suppositories (yay)
I try to eat preservative-free diet with occasional vegetables and fruits

sherbear46
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Jun 2011
Total Posts : 3316
   Posted 1/12/2014 9:49 AM (GMT -7)   
I am always concerned when anyone I know is sick whether its my family, friends or co-workers. At work, if someone feels bad I'm always asking "can I get you something?" or "you should go home" but I am also frantically wiping everything down with clorox wipes and staying 15 feet away from them. I'm a bit of a germaphobe. Even before UC. I do think the Vitamin D supplement has helped me not get sick as often though. :)
Co-Moderator UC and Breast Cancer forums
Sheri-40 years old

Diagnosed UC/IBS April 2009-Left sided Jan 2013 Endo showed gastritis and Colonoscopy showed only 2 cm of rectal inflammation
Diagnosed in Jan 2013 with Chronic Uticartia

Meds-2 Lialda, Aciphex, Allegra, Singulair, Xyzal, Vitamin D3, Hydroxyzine (as needed), probiotics, Canasa 3 x week

Tornado6
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2013
Total Posts : 1155
   Posted 1/12/2014 1:42 PM (GMT -7)   
Judy2 said...
I think you've hit on something there. I suspect that, in many cases, our devotion to our jobs is directly related to the amount of support (or maybe just lack of abuse) we feel from our employer and co-workers.

If they have no concern or loyalty for us, I see little reason we should have for them.


I have reasons. I qualify for FMLA since I've been there more than 12 months. I have six sick and fifteen vacation vacation days, which are partially devoted to FMLA appointments and infusions. I have a 60% pay short-term disability policy. I have a $2500 out of pocket max on my insurance.

I HATE my job, but I sure don't want to lose it!
Ulcerative colitis / 36 / female

Allopurinol - 100 mg
Imuran – 50 mg M - F / 25 mg weekends
Remicade - 7.5 mg / kg @ 8 weeks
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