I had my first surgery a little over eight months after I was diagnosed, when I was 26!
I do not regret my decision. Like you, I couldn't work and could rarely leave the house. I was on a lot of drugs, many of which had unacceptable long term effects on my health (e.g. prednisone), and my GI didn't have anything else to try. I did lots of different diets and some alternative treatments like acupuncture to no avail.
I don't see what I did as giving up because I came to realize that my suffering was not going to cause my body to heal. For a long time I thought that if I just held on and endured the pain and missing out on things I wanted to do in my life, then I would eventually be "rewarded" with remission. But for me, there was no connection between the two. I was waiting for something that would never come. The only thing I "gave up" on was the false idea that my suffering meant anything besides spending one more day in unnecessary pain. I'm a young, ambitious person, and suffering for months or years waiting for a new treatment was not acceptable to me.
I can't decide for you and I would want to know more about
your med history (e.g. what happened with the Humira?) before even hazarding to give advice, but I do want to emphasize that surgery is NOT giving up. There are many things that should factor into your decision but feelings of failure should never be one of them.
dx'ed UC pancolitis 5/12
past meds: asacol hd, VSL#3, apriso, rowasa, xifaxan, 6mp, cortifoam, pentasa, cimzia, canasa, butyrate, flagyl, cipro, prednisone, remicade, methotrexate, cholestyramine, cortenema
current meds: none!
step one: colectomy, end ileo 1/16/13
step two: j-pouch construction, loop ileo 5/1/13
step three: takedown 7/31/13